awaiting second beta results- panicking

[Sams25]

On my 7th cycle I finally got a positive Beta. I have absolutely no symptoms. I am waiting for my second beta results today. Panicking.

dont see any change in the test line (darkness) between yesterday and today.

I have never come this far so really don’t know what to expect. Anyone gone through this ? Looking for some solace.

[Millbanks]

I totally get your stress, but you won’t get a difference in line colour at this stage really.

I was so scared to test at all on my successful transfer so I just had bloods. After 2 viability scans I really wanted to see those 2 lines so did a test at home and was surprised at how weak they were 😂 I was expecting proper dark lines…

My love you are pregnant.

X

[Sams25 in reply to Millbanks]

Thank you 🙏🏻 🙏🏻🙏🏻 and god bless you ❤️.

After so many fails, why is it so hard to believe and so frightening to be happy? It almost feels like imposter syndrome! I am unable to work and thinking of taking a sick day 🥺.

[Millbanks in reply to Sams25]

Do it! You need to take care of you right now.

I struggled with imposter syndrome throughout my whole pregnancy. Like on the tube people would offer me a seat and I’d feel like a fraud. It’s completely normal to feel like that after dealing with infertility.

And it is so hard to believe. Honestly it will take so long for it to sink in. It may never properly sink in…

Xx

[Sams25 in reply to Millbanks]

Today when I went to the clinic for my blood work I almost felt guilty seeing other women sitting in the waiting room. And then the thought that I don’t want to be sitting there - fear that I might .. and then guilt again. This is so shit. How did you survive it?!!!!! Any tips?

Waiting for results is such a hard thing to do. I wish there was a faster way to know. 😐

[Millbanks in reply to Sams25]

Ugh I know exactly what you mean!

I just tried to block it out. Which I know is impossible but I honestly just tried not to think about it too much. If it crept in to my mind I would just push it out.

But equally try to remember that you have as much right to be here as anyone. Even more so! You deserve this x

[Sams25 in reply to Millbanks]

So true! I guess I need to figure out how to be happy for myself and let negative thoughts out. Once the second beta results come back convincing I think it will help 🤞🏻🤞🏻🤞🏻🤞🏻🤞🏻. It’s been a long long and very hard journey so far to get here. I am hoping to enjoy the next leg 🤞🏻🤞🏻🤞🏻🤞🏻🤞🏻🤞🏻🤞🏻

[Millbanks in reply to Sams25]

Yes this is a good plan. Every wait in hard. And there’s no way round it - just take it day by day. Congratulate yourself for each day you tick off xx

[Sams25 in reply to Millbanks]

For sure the line darkness don’t matter right? 🥺

[Millbanks in reply to Sams25]

you don’t need to have a super dark line to have a viable pregnancy ❤️❤️

[Sams25 in reply to Millbanks]

Thank you so much….your right, one day at a time. Need to celebrate and enjoy how far we’ve come. I will try my best ❤️ fingers crossed 🤞🏻 and waiting now for the call 🤞🏻🤞🏻🤞🏻🤞🏻

[MrsOrangejuice]

Aw, I can't say it gets any easier I'm afraid, but in my view getting bloods done is the best thing - the lines are so subjective and can be influenced by so many factors, whereas the bloods are accurate. I found work a distraction waiting for them but of you can't concentrate and need the day off just do it, or whatever helps - go for a walk on your own, see a trusted friend or family member, binge watch Friends... this bit's hard but it will have come and gone before you know it x

[Sams25 in reply to MrsOrangejuice]

Thank you for the kind words ❤️

It’s just that , it’s been such a long and hard journey. And now I am finding it difficult to focus because I want this so much! I am scared of being happy and terrified because of past trauma … can’t focus . Need to rest and deal with one thing at a time.

[Christianbaby]

Totally understand the anxiety. Get that sick day, rest, relax. Wishing you all the best! x

[Sams25 in reply to Christianbaby]

I did ! And it helped a lot 🤞🏻

[Littlepeax]

Ahh congratulations on your positive that's amazing ♥️🫶 How's everything now? How was your beta

[Sams25 in reply to Littlepeax]

Thank you! It went fine. The doctors have not asked for any more blood work. I did only 2 so far. Now need to wait for the scan in 2weeks 😳😥. This process doesn’t help with anxiety management 😐😃.

[Millbanks in reply to Sams25]

Ah so pleased to see this! Yea this bit is tough - not much to help I'm afraid - you just have to tough it out and take it day by day. I think I just tried to think of some nice things that I would do to make myself feel better eventually if it didn't progress. x

[Sams25 in reply to Millbanks]

Thank you ❤️ it scares me to think otherwise. I am trying to not think about it. Just ordered some books to read, hoping it will help. 🤞🏻🤞🏻🤞🏻🤞🏻

[Crie1983]

Hi, I completely sympathise. I found out I had a BFP yesterday and it’s my 7th round. I had a BFP on my 2nd round almost 3 years ago and that ended in miscarriage so my nerves right now are through the rough.

My clinic don’t repeat the BETA test and I have to wait 3 weeks for the viability scan.

I’ve tried to make plans the next few weekends to keep me busy.

Wishing you all the best in your pregnancy. Xx

[Sams25 in reply to Crie1983]

Congratulations!

What was your beta and how many dpt are you now? I too am trying to make plans but nothing seems exciting enough to keep my mind off this 😂

Wishing you all the best with your pregnancy too xx

[Crie1983 in reply to Sams25]

Thank you, yesterday it was 700 at 12dp5dt. It’s the one and only time they are checking it.

Honestly my mind is on nothing else at the moment. I’m finding it so hard to focus on anything and feel like I’m just counting down the days until the scan. Xx

[Sams25 in reply to Crie1983]

That’s a great beta value!

I totally understand - I too have ZERO focus ! Work is suffering- I’ve been taking sick leave and almost thinking to ask my GP to give me a mental health break letter. Even then at home I am then thinking of nothing else !

My friend recommended to order for what to expect when you’re expecting and read . She said that it helps distract from the day to day and focus on the growing baby. I don’t know how far it works, I’ve just ordered the book and it’s coming in 2days. Have you read this already?

[Crie1983 in reply to Sams25]

Yes the clinic were really encouraged with that beta level so that’s good.

It’s no surprise work is suffering, honestly how are we supposed to be calm and focussed given what’s going on. You have just got to do what you feel is right and if that’s taking time off then so be it. Your well-being is so important right now.

I haven’t read that. My partner gave me a pregnancy book when we first got a positive 3 years ago. I told him this time I don’t want to look at it until I know all is ok the 7 week scan. X

[Sams25 in reply to Crie1983]

So sorry to hear that. And I can understand why. I was thinking to read until how far along I am currently and keep that going every week. Don’t want to add on any anxiety. My clinic is going a 6week scan.,Thankfully ..

why does it have to be so tough..

Sending you positive thoughts xx

[Crie1983 in reply to Sams25]

I know, it should be a happy time shouldn’t it but everything is so heightened. And the same to you, I’ll be thinking of you. X

[Sams25 in reply to Crie1983]

Likewise , it’s comforting to know I’m not alone . Everyone I know conceived naturally so there’s no one to talk to about this either. Glad to find well wishers here! Keep me posted on your scan 🤞🏻🤞🏻🤞🏻

[Crie1983 in reply to Sams25]

I will. And you too. Always here if you want to chat. Xx