So happy to finally have found a place onl... - Facial Palsy UK

Facial Palsy UK

1,070 members327 posts

So happy to finally have found a place online where people can understand me. I have bells Palsy since 5 weeks ago

Hidden profile image

I have been feelign really isolate and lonely, i feel no one understand for what i am going throught

13 Replies

My advice is to not stress too much, it can impede recovery, if anything. I'd recommend trying to only be in relaxed situations. Surround yourself with people that make you feel at ease. It'll help your recovery and maintain your self esteem during a difficult process. Try to allow your face to remain relaxed as much as possible (so it can heal), but having a laugh about it isn't the end of the world.

My experience - I first got Bell's Palsy 10 years ago when I was fourteen and still in school, and 2 more times since then. I guarantee the best thing to have is just a positive attitude about it. Nothing sucked more for me than how I thought about myself. It sucks royal, but life goes on =]

Hidden profile image

Thank you Chris. I got Bell's palsy just 5 weeks ago, I had a tumor removed from my left ear and product of that I got Bell's palsy... It has been more down than up this days. Because everybody keep telling me you look great don't worry, it a matter of time, but I don't look great, I don't feel great, and I really hate when people keep telling me like that. I understand they do it to try to cheer me up, but if get really upset. I am on sick leave for 2 months from work. I don't know if I will be fine to go back to normal life/work . I think people always judge for the way you look. I don't like to go out, I feel they always looking at me. Might sounds silly...I know isolation is not good, but right now I don't feel like talking or seen anybody. Thank you for your replay. Is always nice to talk with someone who has experience this sickness.

patriciaol profile image
patriciaol in reply to Hidden

Hi - as someone else has said - try not to stress about your face. Some hospitals offer exercise and electric stimulus and it has been proved to help. I have permanent facial paralysis due to cancer and my main problem is the pain. Gabapentin eases but so does a heat pack! Hope your BP clears soon.Try your distorted laugh on your family !!!

Hidden profile image
Hidden in reply to patriciaol

Hello, yes I am doing rehab 4 times a week, i have electroshock and message and vocal exercises, etc, I have bee reading a lot about bells palsy, and most of the articles does mention you have to relax, is easy to say it, but not s easy to do it, i know i have to relax and think positive i just certain times a day i do get down, i do avoid to see myself in the mirror, but i have other times i do truly believe i will get better is just a matter of time, patience is not my best quality. thank you for writing m and for your good wishes.. Hope you are ok.

I honestly know exactly this feeling. I got mine during the Summer holidays and then had to go back to school without being able to move half my face. I had such panic attacks about it because, you know, kids! I think it's this reason that my face never fully healed (considering I was so young and only like 5% or whatever on Bell's Palsy patients have long-term problems). I mean, it got better, but not completely.

My point is, we are always our own worst critics. It pays to listen to our friends, it's what they're there for. Once I did, I started to heal emotionally and mentally, which is what counts. Some people do care about looks, and do judge, but the people we care about don't. It does require hard work and practice to ignore the negative thoughts, but it's worth it.

Hidden profile image
Hidden in reply to Chris-Essen

Glad to heard you understand how I feel. I feel this illness is a lot of mental and social problem, I mean, physically i am feeling better, i am able to eat, to chew, not everything but most of it. I do have very good and nice friends and family support and they treat me normal,, they don't treat me like I am different. They know i am suffering because i might not be able to g back to my work which is public relations, as unfortunately is all about your image and right now i don;t have it, most probably i will get a desk job at the office, instead of interacting with clients.I had a second surgery after 4 days of my tumor, to make my left eye blink again, so is blinking, is weird because the eye is blinking but my left side of my face still not moving, maybe that's why people ask me whats wrong with me... they think i am always upset because i can not smile, i miss my smile so much, something so simple in life, but at the moment i can't smile ahhhh, well time will tell i guess.

Chris-Essen profile image
Chris-Essen in reply to Hidden

That is definitely very difficult, to be so often in front of strangers as part of your job. I'd say don't change your job though. It's terrifying, but it helps you confront the problem head on. Tack on a plastic half smile and meet the customers! Best part about it being the job is that no one would say anything about it. Really builds up the confidence for when you go out socially. I worked in restaurants when I was 16-20. At first I thought everyone was always staring at my face thinking, "What the ****'s wrong with him?!", but actually, turns out people just want good professional service. We tend to project our own thoughts on other people, so things we obsess over, we think other people obsess over them too. Other people are however busy obsessing over their own things to notice.

That's what I think anyway. I know it's not a magic pill that can make you feel better or less self conscious, but it's what I learned over 10 years with BP. It takes time and patience to accept, but if you face it head on with a bit of humility, it won't be so bad. I don't know about BP through surgery on tumors, but BP is often just temporary, so that's some good news to hang onto as well =]

Hidden profile image

Hello Chris, thank you for all your advice, I will see if i can handle well to go back to my job or i will at the begining do something on the computer desk, is all depend how i feel. Isolation is not the solution, i know that, but will see how everything goes and if i can have some face improvement before going back to work, i really hope so!

KISSYLIPS profile image
KISSYLIPS in reply to Hidden

Hi I have just been stricken down with Bell's palsy. Today is day 5. I am a room leader in a nursery...i have coped with my illness by telling all the customers and children...i find this has helped mask some of the embarrasement on both parties.

Hi every1

i jst got attacked by BP 2 weeks ago and i ddnt even know anything about so depressed and sad and worst part is i have a newborn baby and im drowning in depression..

FPUK profile image
FPUK in reply to ZeeOa050214

Sorry you have been having such a bad time, how are you feeling now? We are actually just setting up a support network for people who had Bell's palsy in pregnancy or not long after giving birth. If you would like to be put in touch with this network please contact the charity, here is the information page about it:

Lucy_84 profile image
Lucy_84 in reply to ZeeOa050214

Hi, I know you posted this a while ago but I also got my Bell's Palsy after having a baby. I just wondered how yours was now. I have had mine for 3 months now and there has been not much change. We must have got our bell's Palsy at a similar time.

BellsP profile image
BellsP in reply to Lucy_84

Hi, I've had Bell's palsy for 12months now but not after having a baby, I think mine was from a virus in my ear & also stress. I have found a support group on face book called courage to smile its a closed group & it really helps chatting with people in the same situation. I really didn't expect to still be struggling with this & it's very hard at times. If you need any advise re treatment I am happy to help.

You may also like...