No great revolutions, or words of wisdom stuff, just hello to other's on their journeys, and am glad to be taking the wins the last number of years, there is always hope if we let ourselves see it.
Just wanted to say howdy to all...it's been qui... - Drink Free
Just wanted to say howdy to all...it's been quiet here.
Written by
fauxartist
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41 Replies
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Howdy, Pardner! Yup…sometimes it does get quiet here….and it’s good to know, though, even if it’s quiet, there’ll be someone here to turn up the volume when needed. Thanks, Faux.
I’ve been quiet for several reasons, but thank goodness it’s not because of alcohol. 🤙🏼
Yeah...quiet is okay as long as we are still on track...missed you pal...glad your okay, and you know me, painting away in my Zen space...
☺️🙏
Yes it is quiet.... hope all are well? Thank you for your support
Me too, that was nice of you say that...and back at ya...another day doing okay, it's a win.
Hi. I hope you’re having a good evening! I also wanted to thank you for your support when I really needed it the most!It means alot!-Shay
fauxartist in reply to
Sounds corney, but I believe in it: 'we freely give what has been given to us'.... the more we practice giving and get better at knowing we deserve receiving too, then, I think we have a more healthy balance.
Take care... 
in reply to fauxartist
No it’s definitely not corny! In fact, it’s one of the sayings when I went to the AA meetings! Thank you!-Shay
Sillysausage234 in reply to
Hi shay ,have you been on hu before? With different user name?
in reply to Sillysausage234
I think when I first signed up on here I chose a different username but I changed it I think within the same day because my current username fits me better! Why?are you asking ?
Sillysausage234 in reply to
Oh ok just reminded me of a user that was here awhile ago wondered where she went ….ok thanks
in reply to Sillysausage234
Ok
in reply to Sillysausage234
so I’m guessing she was also a mess!
Sillysausage234 in reply to
Don’t be too hard on yourself
in reply to Sillysausage234
Can’t help it 
in reply to Sillysausage234
I think I receive help when I give help if that makes sense!
Sillysausage234 in reply to
makes perfect sense shay …enjoy your day I’m off to the pharmacy to pick up my ibs meds …bye
in reply to Sillysausage234
You as well!
my mind is really mixed up and I can’t think! I have been drinking the past couple of days to ease my mental pain, but it’s backfiring on me because I have afib with my heart and these past two days it’s been really acting up. I take pills twice daily for it. And alcohol takes away from the medication and it’s like I didn’t even take the med. I drank for years since my early teens but had my first drink at age 9. From my mom. I also think I have anxiety and depression and not bipolar that I was diagnosed with because I went on YouTube and I don’t act like what I saw! “ I’m tired of even worrying about what I have and I’m tired of talking about it! but I’m thinking It’s time for me to be smart and get help and get with someone I know from AA for a few days Now before I either do myself in or die from afib caused by drinking! “ maybe stay with them for a few days! When I was in detox years ago and in walked a counselor that I knew from rehab and he was drinking for a day and was smart to get himself into detox! Isn’t that crazy? Maybe I was never an alcoholic if I’m able to do this? But I think I’m just lying to myself because when I was in detox before I had the shakes sickness etc. I’ve always questioned myself about everything in my life!! I don’t know!I hope to be back here soon to this forum to chat I appreciate all your responses to me!
fauxartist in reply to
I can only tell you from my experience...I never found any answers or peace at the bottom of a bottle. But the decision has to be about your own sobriety, or it won't work. Don't compare yourself to anyone else, everyone is different, but one thing doesn't change is that if your an alcoholic...you can't drink.
in reply to fauxartist
I have not had a drink today but I took some Xanax so I’m having shakes from this morning. I couldn’t believe I was having shakes only drinking 2 days. I have been talking with AA friends and also hotlines and I am going to go to an AA meeting at 6:30 this evening. I hope that I can fight this! -Shay
fauxartist in reply to
I'd also talk to your doctor about taking Xanax and drinking to not drinking and still taking Xanax....as we are addicted to all things addictive....if you have been a long term drinker... you need professional help to come off the addiction to alcohol, many have had even worse than the shakes such as seizures... and I'm glad your going to meetings, I would ask some there what they know about going cold turkey.
I’m going to my friends place now. Thank you and I hope I can do this! The depression has gotten so bad -Shay
I wake up shaking
fauxartist in reply to
Alcohol is a depressant, and when taking Xanax, it's a double whammy. When your body is chemically imbalanced and the hormones depleted, you can go into a spiral of depression. I really would talk to a doctor for suggestions.
in reply to fauxartist
Hey faux !I’m seriously considering going to detox. I Don’t want to go but may have to . I can’t seem to do this on my own. I just got off the phone with a treatment center because I’m not able to do this on my own Like I thought! Our minds trick us into thinking we can just Do it on our own but I think it’s wrong thinking. I have past experience of This not working!Thank you and everyone else who has been giving me suggestions-Shay
—-It’s funny how our minds can trick us into doing the SAME things over and over But in the end I get the same results ! Thinking I can drink again and not have a problem if I’m moderating! Once again I failed!!! —-I lied to myself and others!!! Oh and I get more than just the shakes and that’s why I feel like I can’t do this on my own!!! But I’m scared. I hope I have it in me to go. I will probably go today and need to be strong !-Shay
fauxartist in reply to
Most all of us needed support in getting to sobriety. First thing is ...no blame, shame, regrets, ... yesterday is gone, and making amends isn't an issue right now, it's your getting help in sobriety that is. Admitting yourself sounds much safer.
in reply to fauxartist
Yes. Still trying to get the strength to go! I’m such a loser. I should have known better!! I hate that I have to go through this again but like I said it’s My fault thinking that I could handle moderation, but in the back of my mind “I already knew!” It’s just the crazy thinking that we “Might” be able this time! -Shay
But I’m taking the Xanax by itself now. Still bad to do? It is calming me somewhat. I will also ask questions individually to someone “if I can” at the meeting tonight Also I don’t want to go inpatient anywhere! I was suggested to go see a therapist at my appointment this morning, but that was for depression and anxiety not for the alcohol! This was the psychiatrist appointment for meds only! She noticed how bad I was with being nervous and she is setting up an appointment And will get in contact with me as to when the appointment is
- Shay
fauxartist in reply to
I can't tell you what's right for you, but I will say that alcohol is part of your life, so of course you should include that in your therapy...this is the beginning of your healing, so give yourself credit for that...it takes great courage to admit to ourselves we need to change old habits and to make the effort to do that...keep fighting the good fight....calm and steady wins the race.
Is that what you meant go inpatient for the alcohol?
I also edited the above comment
fauxartist in reply to
I don't think I said 'go inpatient care', but did say it would be a good idea if you have been a long term drinker to consult a doctor on the idea of going cold turkey....and the proper use of Xanax...they are two different drugs....your body may have formed a chemical dependency on a certain amount of alcohol consumption, and it's something you should get professional help with, for your own safety.
in reply to fauxartist
Ok yes I will do that! Thank you faux!-Shay
in reply to fauxartist
One thing! I’m on metoprolol for my heart and this drug can also be used for alcohol withdrawal it’s not common at all but I was told that before so maybe that can be adjusted at a higher dose for me for now. but I will ask about it But you’re right! Talk to the doctor ! I will ask about that !! -Shay
And thank you for taking the time to talk with me! It means a lot!-Shay
I am going to fight this as hard as I can! I have AA people I know around where I live and will stay close with them ! And do whatever it takes! -Shay
Hey faux, I went to the hospital and while there a recovery specialist came into my room and discussed my options and I had told her that I made a choice to start drinking at lunch have been drinking moderate amounts of alcohol for about 3 days and was doing ok until the Last day in which my thinking had shifted and I knew that I was in deep danger if I started to drink more and more because that’s what I do! She mentioned that I f I stop now before going too far to drinking all day every day that I should be Fine As long as I keep in touch with AA and get all the support that I need! My mind was Tricking me into thinking that I could Handle the moderation. I got extremely scared and my heart rate was over 145 on my fit bit smart watch and I guess that was a good thing because it motivated me to Stop and think about what I was doing! I’m home now and I’m having extreme urges to drink. “Of course “. But this morning I got on AAZoom meetings! It’s a 24/7 international AA meetings I stayed on for about an hour and 1/2. I have a lot of support from AA members who keep calling me to check up on me and I’m going to go to meetings too. I didn’t talk on Zoom but listened carefully. I know what I need to do to stay sober and I have to be willing to take advice! - I hope you’re all doing well here on Drink Free! -Shay
fauxartist in reply to
a day at a time Shay....best wishes
thanks. Yes I’m a mess. All you say is truth. With Xanax …Trying to figure out what to do. I won’t bug you! Sorry I just realized how much I was messsaging you!
fauxartist in reply to
Have you talked to your AA friends about what they think about taking Xanax...it might be a good idea to get some input.
I get what you’re saying. But if you look up Xanax for alcohol withdrawal you will see that it is used for withdrawal.maybe I’m doing everything wrong. I just feel lost and so alone. I just want to feel better!. I probably should have been honest at the hospital and told them that I’ve been having SI’s. I’m feeling sick all of the time and keep losing weight. I have no appetite. I think it’s the depression. The AA members I’ve been talking to at the meetings asked me if I told the doctor at the hospital that I’ve been having these thoughts and I told her no. I’m just scared of going into the inpatient facility there. I don’t like not being in control. Hopefully these thoughts will leave me soon. I keep getting awful panic attacks. more than I ever had -and I suffer from paranoia a. I just want to feel better-tired of living this way. —I’m trying. But it is so hard- I’ve been the past day been going On the 24 seven national AA meetings on zoom and I’ve been staying on pretty much all day just listening! Trying to get something out of it- A song by REM has been keeping me going on. It’s called Everybody Hurts ! - and I need to try to hang on! -Shay
It's never advisable to self-medicate without a doctor ...
in reply to fauxartist
I understand! And you are 100% right!
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