social events

[Leftie]

Well 40 days sober and had my future daughter in laws hen party yesterday. It involved a party bus with lots of alcohol and then a drag act. It was so difficult. The looks I got due to saying no to a drink and then later the expectations getting up to dance and sing. I am introverted at the best of times but this was painful to sit through. Anybody got any tips on such occasions ?

[LilyAnnepuppy Ambassador]

That sounds like a terrible situation to be in, and I’ve got 45 years without a drink. I think you were very fortunate to have gotten through it. What I do when I go places now where there’s drinking vary. If anyone asks me why I’m not drinking I tell them I am allergic to alcohol. Which I am. I make sure I have a normal beverage in my hand at all times. And if I put it down somewhere and leave it unattended, I get another one. I make sure I have my phone so I can call someone from my support system if need be. Also I make sure I have a valid reason for going to “slippery places.” I’ve also been known not to attend if I’ve felt uncomfortable. I take my own car so I can leave at any time.

Drinking will eventually kill me (alcoholism is a fatal disease). But before it does it will make my life a living hell. Making me tired of living.

Glad you posted. Keep coming back.

[Isinatra]

After I had several years of sobriety under my belt, I allowed myself to attend a few occasions that I knew alcohol would be involved, but with all the precautions in place as LilyAnne suggested. But in my early days I didn’t place myself in situations where I’d be tempted to drink. I said no a lot because my sobriety/life depended on it. AA gave me the support to say no. I needed time to build a more solid foundation to live in a world saturated with alcohol. We can only control our environment so much. If I had been invited to the White House for a State dinner, I would have said no. The excuses, if needed, would fit the occasion.

[fauxartist]

Now that you survived the drink fest party animal hen party....if I may offer advice given to me. Stay out of slippery places....don't go to bars and drink orientated parties, people you used to go out with to drink probably will change, but if you do meetings, you will make sober friends. Triggers are going to happen and understanding that the first urge may be to grab a drink....count to ten and call a sober friend. Don't keep alcohol in the house....ever. During holidays, people will come over with drink, just let them know coming in the door, that they can either take whats left over back with them or it goes down the drain when they leave.

There are going to be changes we make to stay drink free...and they can only get better.