Do you think a woman with Parkinson's and... - Cure Parkinson's
Do you think a woman with Parkinson's and a man with Parkinson's can live together and have a relationship?
I've wondered this myself. Depending on each person's level of disability someone else might have to come in to help with tasks that neither can handle. I know i ask my husband to do things for me that I used to be able to do myself - write my checks, reach things on shelves, open jars and bottles - the list goes on and on. I think one of the couple still needs to be strong. I will be interested in what others have to say.
I don't see why not. There are ways to manage. I think I would feel comfortable if I met someone with Parkinsons. I'm a widow and to be honest with you, I stopped dating because I had Parkinsons. I don't think anyone would want to be with someone who has tremors once in a while.
Dont give up. I was diagnosed and then divorced quite rapidly. Still hoping!
same happened to me,my wife couldnt cope with me having PD so she went off with someone else,whatever happened to in sickness and in health?
That's terrible. She should stop and think that it could have been her that got sick. My husband passed away from Lou Gehrigs Disease (ALS) 7 years ago. He suffered for 3 years. I had 3 small children at the time and I was his caretaker. He wouldn't let anybody else help him. It was very rough but when you love someone you do what you have to
When i first met her i supported and helped her with agrophobia and panic attacks,so much so that after 18 months she had gained enough confidence to go out and even hold down a job,but some where in her mind this was forgotten which made what happened when i got PD even harder to take,now i just realise i had a lucky escape,what goes around comes around shes not through this life yet.
where do you live??? <grin>
If any man and woman can live together successfully , then why not. Who could possibly be more self aware and better understand. Every couple has problems, you may just be a bit more prepared for a life less sure.
hi I would love to have ago . if any lady is willing to take a trip down lover lane with EXPORT.
my
where is my answer
Me too. Parkinson's street is a lonely place. I must say that love conquers all. Its hard work finding it when you are shaky, don't let it go!
I wonder if two men with PD could live together also?
I don't see why anyone who shows devotion or love to another person should or could not live together, no matter what the problem or illness.
In fact I might improve the condition.
I think most relationships in the first 3 years . mood swing are killer. If you can through the mood swing you have agooda chance as anyone
yours EXPORT.
Hello Anthonyd162,
What a great question. Speaking as a person with Parkinson's with a wife who is abled bodied, I am aware that I can so easily become a passenger in our relationship. Let me kid you not, I can not do as many jobs that need to be done as she does, but I try to the best of my ability to contribute so that the jobs involved in everyday living does not fall entirely on her. So, in the situation that you describe in your question, each wold have different capabilities and as long they contribute to their potential I can see no good reason why it can not work. I can see that a problem would arise if say one or both are really only looking for a carer, but then doesn't that happen in many able bodied people's relationships also? Before getting into a relationship I would try and establish that you could help each other by the other's attitude to life. Given that they both want to contribute to the relationship, then why should it not work?
If you are one of the people in question Anthony, I have no doubt that you are as far away as can be from being a passenger in any relationship.
Regards
Norton
The strengths that each brings may be more than physical. Compassion and love go a long way to making it through the day. Two heads are better than one when it comes to figuring out the details. It can work, if love is the basis of the relationship.
Absolutely Jash
I met my Partner after I was diagnosed with Pd. We had a strong sensual link when we met on a dating website and this carried on for months before we started to talk on the telephone - from the very beginning she knew about my Pd but we had a meeting of minds.
When we met it was explosive and very sexual - it was wonderful.
We carried on visiting each other for about 6 months and the relationship flourished. Each time she visited me, I took her to Branch meetings so that she got to know the condition, the people and the potential prognosis - and gave her every opportunity to back out but she was as hooked as I was and we started living together and have been so for 4 years.
She is very understanding and has no problem with me needing a nap when I am tired and is very understanding.when I have an off day. I for my part do everything I can - I still chop the wood - having sawn the branches up with my chainsaw! - and wash the car and do the grocery shopping because I like doing it.
We still have an active sex life although I am 68 (and have been diagnosed 11 years) and she is 70 and believe we lead a full life together despite the damned Pd
So, don't be put off by the beast - get out there and enjoy life!
This is for froggatt55. I'm 56 and I went off of the dating websites when I was diagnosed with PD. I was honest and told whoever I spoke to that I had PD and the seemed turned off so I gave up on dating. I just want to tell you that you got lucky.
I most certainly am but if I say so myself, I am a very determined character and don't let the beast control my life - although it wins a few battles.
I was a very gregarious person before Pd and can still come out of my cage when the occasion demands it
Having said that, I was very fit when we met and that helped.
I met a lady a few years back in the gym and she also made it clear that Pd was not an issue for her - but to balance the scales, the lady with whom I had a 5 year relationship after I separated from my wife made it quite clear that she could not see a longer term relationship because of Pd
So remember the Motto "Who Dares Wins" and get out there - love can be found in all sorts of places
Kind regards
Hopefully you are on while they are Off/On? Take your choice...each has it's benefits.
I am married but I would not hesitate having a relationship with another PD Px, if I was attracted to them. By the Way< i wouldn't search for a PWP, but if I fell in LOVE then sure bring your beast to the party...
This is a wonderful thread!
I believe success in life, however defined, is in large measure a function of attitude. If you think PD or age or limitations of whatever you perceive to be negative characteristics defines who you are, then you diminish yourself. But if you look at PD as just another aspect of a rich full interesting life, then others are more likely to see you this way too.
My nearly 25 year marriage ended in part because I realized with my PD diagnosis that I didn't have or didn't want to waste any more time in a loveless marriage with a person who was not emotionally equipped to help with or even understand my PD limitations. Since divorcing, I've had more dates than I had in my twenties. I tell some I have PD and not others - at least not right away. And I have dated someone with PD and that relationship was lovely but again PD was not the focus of the relationship.
Life is a journey. I an choosing to look for love and finding this to be an exciting new adventure.
I think your post is wonderful and I could not put it better.
We are only on this planet once (so far as we know) so go for it!
I often feel I am blessed with having Pd because of all the wonderful people I have met and corresponded with - just as now
Kind regards and best wishes
I feel the same about all the wonderful people I am meeting and all that I am learning. My non PD husband really stepped up to the plate, going to doctors and classes with me. We each do what we can to create as full a life as possible. We have our own friends and family that we see so we have independence, too.
He comes home from a trip or movie or other event and says "You would have hated this" or "there was a lot of walking - you wouldn't have enjoyed it". So he gets to do his thing and I'm happily doing my things at home.
We're older (72 and 76) and been married 13 years.
Amen! I also left a 25 year marriage to someone who wasn't there for me. I had a friend with PD I wanted to meet. And guess what, LOVE happened. We've been together 8 years now. I have a new family, grandchild, home... and love. That's what life is about.
I can think of 6 PD couples that have been together for at 6 years or more, myself included. I don't understand how a person with PD can live with some one that does not have PD. How do you explain the yes I could do it 5 mins. ago but I can't now? If drop my plate of food I get to clean it up makes me a lot more careful then then I might be otherwise. I would think it would be to easy to make the caregiver do it all. I don't want or need a caregiver I want a life partner. With both having PD we are equals again. Driving was our biggest challenge planning a trip to town making sure that one of us was "on" for the return trip, We went though DBS together on the same day. DBS has helped with the driving. So tell me how do you relate to your spouse that does not have PD? Does that caregiver label get in the way of LOVE?
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Hi Steve R
It is not always easy but, as I said, my partner is very patient and understanding - we are in love which helps. The only thing that she complains about is when I have a midnight feast - which can be any time up to 03.00 - and drop bits of cake or (worst of all) drop some raspberry jam on the carpet. I don't have a problem with this and promise I'll do better!
I have twice fallen backwards down the stairs and each time she has come to my rescue - by helping me to get on my knees as I am too heavy for her to lift me (I am 6 feet 1 inch and 13.5 stones (sorry if you are in the USA as I think you use kilograms)) - we had a good laughter together. The laughter and the same sense of humour are of enormous importance to us and is perhaps the key component.
I am also a very determined character and didn't say earlier that at times when I am chopping logs I am almost out of it but as our Special Forces (SAS) Regiment's Motto says "Who Dares Wins"
I can understand where you are coming from but it works for us. We cannot tell the future of course but that is the same for normal people as it is for us
Kind regards
Steve, Your and Linda's relationship is the benchmark for me regarding this subject. My husband passed 18 months ago. How can a Parkie not be with another Parkie? I agree with Steve...it is such a blessing not to constantly have to explain yourself what your body is and isn't doing and why. But then again..whatever floats your boat.
Sorry Steve,
I did not respond to your last question but the answer is a kind and generous nature and one who invests to ensure full compliance with the physical requirements plus a meeting of minds and companionship - plus a cup of tea in bed each morning!
SteveR
I am happy for you that you found your special someone. Loving committed bonded couples make relationships work each and every day. Some have common life experiences from which to draw their strength; others have very different backgrounds and those differences can be equally motivating. If the two partners love each other, communicate well, have respect for each other, value each other, and allow each other to be their own authentic selves, then the relationship will work -- PD or no PD. At bottom, these are likely the values that fuel your own successful relationship.
Love conquers all. Real love. I am still married , going to divorce and happy, 15 yrs.
Once I was diagnosed the everyday question
How are we going to pay for your meds etc.
I just retired after 26 yrs I filed a yr ago and
Still not free although I moved no choice
Willing to give up everything (ca community
Property) just for peace of mind no children.
And still no divorce . Mr wonderful
Wants me back , how do I love you show me the way
To the bank account he loves me so much wants me to
Release all properties what guy ? It's his way
Of torture . I married for love. Stay tune.
Live,laugh, love, watch you're bank account. If you pray remember me, lolitalola, Thank you.
Ll
I
It certainly does Lolitatola
The financial aspect is something we all have to contend with as with everything and everybody we all have to compromise and be prepared to give and take. But reaching out is soooo important
You will certainly be in my prayers tonight
Kind regards
If love happends it happends - let love be the one who decide - if you falling in love with anyone with P - there is a meaning in that.
I think it is important to just be open for what ever comes.
Laila
Love is a many-splendored thing! Yes---I believe it could be wonderful!
Being single with PD is difficult. I have had guys who completely rejected me when they found out that I had PD. I think part is a lack of understanding and part is just plain selfishness. I would not want to be in a relationship with someone who rejects me in that way. I always think the same could happen to them at any time, we never know what tomorrow may bring.
I have had other guys who like me for who I am even with PD, though I have not found that "madly in love" person.
I do believe it would be easier to be with another PWP because there is an understanding of what each is going through.
I have ms my husband (linus61) parkinsons. Both neuro
Problems, we celebrate our silver anniversary in october.
So my answer to you is no problem.
If you are lucky enough to meet that special someone..when the electricity between you almost sparks...and the chemistry..and connection cannot be contained...it won't matter that you both have PD...believe me.
Absolutely! My husband Johnnie and I have been together for 8 years now. We met, fell in love, got married, moved to Arkansas... bought a home & renovated it. All while being diagnosed with Parkinson's.
Don't let your disease steal your possible future happiness. Take the chance. It's worth it.
hi i have psp and me tmy partner when i was showing signs of it but not dxd
we now live together and it is more ddiffciult fo rhim htan for me- he is abel bodiedb bu t hates to see me fall
(Balamnce probs means it happens 4/5 times daily)
he pushes me to do things which is goo dfor me (up to a point)
mor elater
go t aPSP MEETING in Preston today - he is takign me and for the 1st tiem iwll hav e to meet others in the same boat
he does not "DO HEALTH MATTERS AT ALL!"
LoL jiLL
heck yes.............if I could meet a man who would put up with me....in a heart beat......
we can lean on each other .
mental support and hugs...........what could be better??? anyone want to come to Arizona????
come find me.........................<grin>
Jaynie
It's difficult when both partners have disabilities. I have PD and my hubby has multiple disabilities from Agent orange exposure in Vietnam. He's worse off than I am and helping him with his issues keep me strong. Wish he would take more of an interest in my problems but I know he has my back when I will really need him, to the best that he can. I can't complain because we do have a good life. We were married 6 years ago, right before my symptoms worsened and my diagnosis and he's still here and my best friend. Take care of yourselves everyone!
Go for it! I think God brought you together for a reason.
Obvioously there is a lot of room for joking inherent to the situation between two peple in love that share involuntary movement that could be compatible with sexual moviement. But I leave it up to your imaginations. At the higher level of thought I'd say that two people sharing a common health challenge have a step up in the area of compatibility.
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