How do you deal with the uncertainty?

[LemonMeringue15]

I've posted with details of my ex's diagnosis of end stage liver disease in the last week. I just wonder how others deal with the ongoing limbo amd panic every time the phone goes? He continues to drink so its only a matter of time.

[Kji378]

Hi 🙂

How are things at the moment, have things gone further down hill?

I hope you are keeping it together for you and your girls as well as you can lovely. It must be a horrible situation to be in, especially this time of the year. Bless you ❣

All I suggest is to be as strong as you can be, stay grounded and look after yourself 🤗

[LemonMeringue15 in reply to Kji378]

Thank you. No, I have no idea what's going on with him, I just assume the worst.

[DavyGravy]

Hi Lemon

As KJi has already summed it up perfectly... "be as strong as you can be, stay grounded and look after yourself"

Your ex will take up your time in the future, no need to let him take up your present. You need to concentrate on your children and partner making sure everything is "normal" for them. Your children need a lovely christmas and so do you.

I know you will have anxiety and every phone call or knock at the door will probably make a hard lump appear in the bottom of your stomach.

I understand completely that once we have loved someone we never really cut that bond, there is always something even if it is just a single thread that connects us, regardless of how bad things were at the end of a relationship, our minds seem to remember the good times.

But you climbed out of that vicious circle once before and now as Kji has said, you need to be strong. You must appear outwardly as though everything is just the daily routine. Do not let your ex's problems become your own.

That knock, or call, might not come for months... it is all in his own hands. People cannot be forced to accept medical advice, but you should not put your life on a state of constant alert or else you will be just as much a victim to his drinking as he is.

I hope you have a very lovely christmas, and a very peaceful time.

Dave.

[LemonMeringue15 in reply to DavyGravy]

Thank you, very wise words

[Hidden]

Hello,

I can see our forum members are offering lots of support.

You may also wish to contact al-anon, a charity for those affected by another persons drinking .

al-anonuk.org.uk/

Take care of yourself,

Trust9