Grief : My lovely Mum passed away at 4a... - Lung Conditions C...

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Grief

shouty profile image
33 Replies

My lovely Mum passed away at 4a.m this morning after years of Dementia & what I believe was cancer near the end. So grateful I was there at the end despite having Bronchiectasis flare up. Need to stop smoking but having only just lost my 22yr old nephew 6months ago & my best friend a few months before that.

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shouty profile image
shouty
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33 Replies
Patsy164 profile image
Patsy164

So sorry to hear your sad news shouty. You have been through a lot of grief lately and I know it’s hard especially with so many family members. You are suffering with bronch as well, me too. I hope you get on top of the exacerbation soon. X

CDPO16 profile image
CDPO16

Thinking of you at this sad time xx

hypercat54 profile image
hypercat54

So sorry to hear that. My condolences x

Hacienda profile image
Hacienda

My Heart Felt Condolences Hun, I Know what your Going through, having lost Family members Recently. Gentle Hugs to you. xxx

HungryHufflepuff profile image
HungryHufflepuff

I am sorry for your loss. You will be in my thoughts and prayers 💐

sassy59 profile image
sassy59

Dear shouty you’ve been through so much in such a short time. So very sorry to hear of your sad loss and thinking of you at such a difficult time. Take care xxxx

jmsutt73 profile image
jmsutt73

My condolences, Shouty, Losing Mom is always hard, regardless of their health issues. Though it is true that there are some things worse than death, and it sounds as if your dear mom had reach such a state. May God bless your hurting heart. J

in reply to jmsutt73

It may sound cold however it’s not the intended emotion I want to advocate. Very sorry for your loss and hoping you can cope. My daughters common law husband shot himself in the head with his colt 45 pistol last week. I attended his funeral last Saturday. He was 28 yrs old. During my daughters speech she was crying. As I looked around the hall I only saw two people crying. Tissue packages were placed at each table ending up unopened. The funeral was 8 days after the incident. Apparently, sadly and shockingly it was enough time for the majority to have already recovered from. I’m very near the end of my life from alpha one genetic copd. While I don’t consider myself a narcissist, I’ve instructed my family to please not provide the mini plastic covered tissue packs on the tables. While I realize I’ll be checked out so to speak....it’s rather humiliating no one even had a booger to swipe!

AndrewT profile image
AndrewT

Dear shouty,

I have just offered two 'things' here....One a Prayer, for you and your Mum, Nephew and Best Friend- Secondly I have shed a Tear, for you, shouty. The only 'Saving Grace', is that your Dear Mother is now Out Of Pain- Mentally and Physically and, I truly Believe, with HER family. As regards your Nephew and Best Friend, may they be At Peace too.

I'm sorry, that I can't offer you any other help shouty I feel, like many others here, that I just want to give you a BIG hug 🤼‍♀️ (Close as I could find). I KNOW that I speak, for all, when I say please DO contact us, should you need to. You can PM me, if you wish, although I have NOT had too much experience of this myself.

Sending you ALL our Love shouty.

AndrewT

Beulah84 profile image
Beulah84

So sorry to hear about your loss

My mum passed away in may after suffering many years with altzehmirs. It robbed her of everything and I miss her every day. Just take one day at a time xx

cofdrop-UK profile image
cofdrop-UK

Dear shouty, I am so sorry to hear of the passing of your dear Mum. Please accept my sincere condolences. You have had so many losses to deal with in such a short time.

Take good care of your lungs - I am sure your Mum would waant that for you.

Cx

powderpuff profile image
powderpuff

So, so sorry to hear this! My thoughts are with you & please be gentle & kind to yourself, that’s a lot of grief to deal with 💐

Oh Shouty what a difficult time for you, I am so sorry. Don 😘 x

wheezyof profile image
wheezyof

Oh Shouty,

I just want to hug you and cry with you.

My mother had vascular dementia.

My sister and I had almost got used to the poor confused, sometimes violent and frequently changeable old lady she had become. We of course were heart broken when she died. However as we sorted her muddled house (we tried to do so when she was alive) we found behind the muddle remnants of our 'real' mother. Here was the box of emboideries, there a suitcase of knitwear she'd made, a folder of certificates she'd earned. Then although we were still sad from losing her we came to accept that her poor tired body had finally caught up with her brilliant personality, her great intelligence, the vital person that she used to be.

It's so hard seeing a beloved mother die. When you are able to, think of the good times and do your best to emulate her.

Much love xxxx

Oshgosh profile image
Oshgosh

Be kind to yourself

Damon1864 profile image
Damon1864Volunteer

Dear Shouty so very sorry to hear your dad news, you certainly have had a bad six months .. My thoughts and prayers are with you and take care of yourself 😥 Bernadette xx

skischool profile image
skischool

Shouty,Mum will always be in your heart and she will have known you were there when she started her final journey,dementia may have robbed her mind but her spirit is now free and at peace. :) x

Dilly2 profile image
Dilly2

Dementia wicked so sorry

Whitechinchilla profile image
Whitechinchilla

Dear Shouty,

I feel your pain and your loss and your sadness,

But, please don’t be too hard on yourself right now.

Everything in its time.

Concentrate on making sure that you look after yourself properly.

Anything else can wait, for now.

Be grateful for the wonderful memories and the love you shared with her..

What a privilege to be with your lovely mum at the end.

That’s so precious.

Fond wishes

X

Caspiana profile image
Caspiana

Very sorry to read this shouty . Heart breaking for you and your family. She's at peace. Sending you and your family my heartfelt condolences.

Cas xx 🌹

shouty profile image
shouty

Thank you all for your kind messages of support xx

hoping2improve profile image
hoping2improve

I am so very sorry for your losses .

I can understand some of your loss.

My mum passed away recently due to final stage dementia. Be gentle with yourself x

Nicholatracy profile image
Nicholatracy

So very sorry - prayers and strength to you and your family.

alyvonne profile image
alyvonne

So sorry for your sad losses. X

kathbrad3 profile image
kathbrad3

I am very sorry and send my love xx

gingermusic profile image
gingermusic

So sorry to hear you have lost your dear Mum but be relieved that she is now at peace and no longer suffering. The best thing you can do now, is to help yourslef as her dearest wish for you would be for you to give up the smoking and so improve your own problems. It is all to easy to say its the wrong time while you are grieving but there is never a wrong time believe me. Think of it as doing something she would have been proud of you for doing. I really wish you well and just take each day as it comes.

Shirleyj profile image
Shirleyj

So sorry for your loss x

jackdup profile image
jackdup

So sorry to hear of your loss, my condolences.

Carnival567 profile image
Carnival567

So sorry to hear your sad news xx

Ergendl profile image
Ergendl

So sorry to hear you've lost your Mum so soon after losing other people special to you. ((((Hugs)))).

Tugun profile image
Tugun

Sorry for your loss. My thoughts and prayers are with you. I'm glad you were able to be with her at the end.

Lemon7 profile image
Lemon7

So much to deal with in a short space of time. Hoping for better times for you in the future, take care of yourself.

Izb1 profile image
Izb1

I am so sorry to hear your sad news Shouty , I missed this post yesterday, hence the reason for the delay in responding. I was devasted when I lost my Mum, so sending you condolences and prayers x

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