Smoking: Hi all. I was diagnosed... - British Lung Foun...

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melaniedovey profile image

Hi all. I was diagnosed 3 years ago my father died from copd bought on by a heart attack. 8 months later I was diagnosed . I'm 47 my dad died at 65. I struggle to stop smoking and to be honest my future in my eyes look grim. I've struggled with my depression and anxiety. I'm so sad and feel like a failure . I don't know what to do apart from hide in my room when I feel like this. Sorry for being so low can anyone help xx

11 Replies
Damon1864 profile image

Please don't hide away that won't solve anything, if you don't stop smoking for yourself then do it for your dad. You with plenty of love and support and willpower you can achieve this. Is there a hobby or something you could take up to help you. We will support you but giving up will benefit you in more ways than one. Please let us know how you are doing, remember we are all here for you. Good luck and take care, I know you can do this

😊 Bernadette xxx

Good advice from Damon. This is a great site, you will learn so much.🐞

Hi nice to meet you. I smoked for 44 years including 9 years after mild diagnosis of copd. I stopped a year ago with the help of the great quit support site on here. You don't have to be stopped to join the site - I actually lurked in there for a few months soaking up all the positivity and help from them all before I finally made my attempt. I have now been stopped for a year and my cough has virtually stopped.

I also suffer from depression and was terrified it would get worse or something drastic would happen if I stopped smoking. I made excuses and put my quit date off for 5 days then got so annoyed with myself I shoved a patch on, got my white inhalator out, and waited to see what would happen. Well the sky didn't fall in, my cat didn't come home rabid and bite me. In fact the day was quite a breeze.

Fortunately my copd is still mild but I have been lucky and you can't guarantee you will stay the same, so have a look at the site and work yourself up to quitting. This has bolstered my self esteem no end. It will yours too. x

I’m not surprised you feel so down as you are going through such a lot. Have you talked to your doctor about how you feel? I have had bad depression for years and take anti-depressants for some time and started counselling today. Please don’t struggle on alone, we are all here for you xx

Get some help with your low mood first, then you'll stop smoking easily.

In the mean time, cut down to 3 cigs a day, then Two, then one.

I was going through hell, shock of my diagnosis and the loss of my partner of 33 years knocked me for six.

I was so low, I just couldn't stop smoking.

As soon as my depression medication Kicked in, I started to feel better in myself.

I did the reducing for a few weeks and quit.

You can do it. xx

As others have suggested your mental health is vital to your ability to stop smoking. Obviously there is no quick fix. It did take me a long time to stop smoking and believe me after 40 odd years of smoking it was difficult. In your case it my be a lack of confidence in yourself that could be a major problem. Personally I would not put yourself under too much pressure. Give yourself small goals. For example if you smoke 20 a day try cutting down to 18 a day. Gave yourself a little victory and try and reduce further. Obviously you are going to have had days when you may not hit your target but you can say to yourself a least I did well for 6 of the 7 days. You are intelligent and know you need to give up so start today. I was a very heavy smoker and took all the support I could! Gum, vaping, e cigs, patches you name it I tried it. I thought it was a great victory to get down to ten a day! It was only then that I started to believe I could do it. Yes I have slipped but the way I see it is you are only human. The important point is not to give up trying and you will do it.

I've never smoked so don't feel I can help you much but I had an idea so thought I'd share it. Is there something you'd love to buy yourself. A nice item of clothing maybe? Work out how much each fag costs and when you smoke one less a day put that money to one side. Keep doing it until you can treat yourself. That way not only are you helping yourself but you've also got something physical to show for it?

H xxx

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Once you quit smoking you will be mad at yourself for not doing it sooner. The horrible urges will start to go away. That being said, smoking was the most difficult vice ive ever quit. It was quite hard. I actually felt sick the first three days like I had the flu. Fever, shakes etc. many of my friends told me they didn’t have that reaction. I did! Now that it’s been years since I stopped I barely remember ever being a smoker. You can do this! Get all the help you can. From your Dr. support groups etc.....It does mean your life. I too suffer from severe depression. I cycle through meds as I try to find the correct cocktail that doesn’t have too bad of side effects. I don’t know if you are religious but prayer and attending my church did help me. Along with a couple good friends I could whine too.


Hello, don't beat yourself up so much about your condition. There are treatments out there but you do have to research them. Consider Lung transplant, lung reduction surgery, lung valves,lung coils and even stem cell treatments (These are mainly self funded tho') that should keep you busy for a while and take your mind off bad things. Do not use the web/internet for too much information on your condition it often frightens you witless & quotes the worst scenarios.

Keep your chin up,



Hello again, I've realised there is a song "always look on the bright side of life" you should do the same there are many people on here that have problems far worse than you describe. Get out of the room, not lock yourself away. The treatments that are out there are not suitable for me as I have cancer of the bone marrow and all clinics turn me down.

Without cancer you could find other ways of improving your lot, take them.


For what it's worth Melanie I smoked a pack a day for 60+ years, got an e-cig in 2010, Jan 28th to be precise, and have never smoked a cigarette since. I get the pleasure of nicotine which is a relatively harmless substance, much like the caffeine in coffee, but no smoke which is the cancer-causing irritant in combusted tobacco. Had no withdrawal symptoms and health and finances improved immediately. Vaping is 95% safer than smoking - fact.

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