Am i being over sensitive ?

2 weeks ago i had a new bathroom fitted because my ot said a walk in shower would be easier for me..which has changed my life for the good i would like to say...

One of my neighbours is going nuts over it and wants to know why ive had it when she couldnt get new taps she needs because of her sore hands.

Im 49 and told her i didnt want the new bathroom and she actually told me to my face how LUCKY i am and i should be happy to have it.

I couldnt get her to understand . She says i have a negative attitude

Am i being oversensitive because im upset by her words and attitude.....or is she right and i should see myself as LUCKY and be happy about it. Do i have a negative attitude as she says because sometimes i dont even know myself anymore

Is it me going mad or the rest of the world

51 Replies

  • How can a disability be viewed as being lucky? You needed the adaptations and you got them. Your neighbour needs to get over her problem of being jealous at not being as disabled as yourself. I don't think you have an over sensitivity problem, but a jealous neighbour problem. BTW are you finding the walk in shower helpful?

  • that shower is the best thing thats happened to me ha ha

    i use to get in the bath and hold the shower head and i had no idea how hard it was till i got this walk in one it has a seat....if your thinking of getting one do it

    im a single woman of 49 and hoped one day to meet someone new till i got my shower ha ha

  • The OT is assessing my needs on Friday for a chair lift to get upstairs to the bathroom, as well as converting the bathroom to a wet room. You take care, enjoy your shower and forget your nosy neighbour.

  • i have a chairlift too....she dosnt know that yet ha ha....the level access shower is fantastic it sooooooooo much easier but my point i was trying to get through to my neigbour was that i didnt want to be ill and have it put in not that i wasnt happy with it i am its fab

  • Some people only want to hear what they want to hear. You can't change them.

  • What can a say really people can be a funny lot .. Obv ya neighbours as few unresolved issues she might need resoving or treatment for

    A think its great news and you should just enjoy as your neighbour done suffering you have ..

    As to being over sensitive might be a tad but why u feel need to explane

  • Mmm difficult this one. I can see both sides! When I got DLA I was thrilled for 5 mins then quite upset that, needed it and bad enough to be awarded it!! Since the. I have try to turn it into a positive. Because I get DLA I can work part time which is a blessing because full time is not viable.....

    I don't think you are 'lucky' to get a walk in shower. Is a necessary evil but you need to make the best of it. Maybe buy some new towels and try to view it more positively.?! From the sound of your neighbour I would avoid discussing things with her in future or not tell her who paid for things.

  • hi mandy,no your not going mad,, but the rest of the world is,,,,,, how crazy some folks are at times, if the o.t says you need it, you need it,, i wouldnt worry what anyone says, its for your benefit, as you cant bathe without it.

    but as far as "the rest of the world is going mad" i will tell you why, my o,t says i need a walk in bath!!!!, but under some crazy rule, i live in a residential mobile home site, they can allow a grant for the disabled, for houses to fit walk in baths or showers, but this grant doesnt cover residential mobile homes [ive been here 15 years],, the red cross lady, was fuming at this, and tried her hardest to fight this , but no,,,rules are rules,, it costs too much!!!!

    YET!!! i have a carer each morning, and she is allowed an hour every wednesday to lift my legs into the bath, and bathe me, with my help,,,,,now how much would this cost!!!!,, could common sense not prevail, and could they not realize that it would eventually be cheaper just to fit a walk in bath!!! or shower.!!!

    yes mandy, the rest of the world is going mad. you enjoy your new bathroom, what can be better than to say," it has changed your life",,,,, and as for that neighbour,, well , just give her a "tap" on the head:)

    you just enjoy your new bathroom, it will make your life a lot easier,,, all the very best,, jimmy xxx

  • ha ha ha yeah good idea i would love to give her a tap on the head she may be less nosy then

  • aye thats the best way mandy,, ha ha,,

    i have a real nosy neighbour even to the extent of putting a crack in the fence so he can see through!!,, unbelievable!!,,

    anyway although i diverse, i was give these wee tweeting birds from the garden centre, solar powered things,you can switch on or off, when you walk past them they twitter like a real bird, when i switch one on, this neighbour comes out like a shot, looking in the air for this lovely tweeting bird, i then switch it off ha ha,,, hes been looking for this bird all summer ,true,,, im terrible arent i lol:)

    enjoy your new bathroom, pleased for you,, jimmyxxx

  • ha ha ha h a ha

    oh my goodness i nearly choked on my coffee laughing at that its the funniest thing ive heard in a long time

  • ha ha,, bet you had a brand new white tea shirt on,,,,,:) :) it always happens then,, keep smiling mandy,

    , im now going out to switch my bird on for a few minutes ha ha,, jimmy xxx

  • oh jimmy you rascal that's so funny....

  • :) :)

  • Oh you are naughty, but I like you

  • :) :) ,,

    ,mandy should say to her nosy neighbour,,,in a very polite manner [that means without swearing lol]

    "ive just had a new bathroom fitted, , ,,,,would you care for the old one,, free:)

    teach her to be a nosy git ha ha

  • Oh someone actually pinched my old bath out of the skip when they took it out....i wonder if it was her ha ha ha

  • it was definitely that nosy neighbour mandy ha ha ha,,,,,

    i had to laugh at your post there, ,, brilliant:) :)

  • So glad you have and are now enjoying your new bathroom. Perishing neighbours should mind there own business they don't have to walk in your shoes.

    Don't feel bad about it, they don't give things to people who don't need them.

    Keep smiling

    polly xx

  • Hi


    Lucky is not having to deal with such a dreadful disease.

    People do not relize grants are available so we can live an indepented live.

    One that as been around for some time is bathrooms, you can have a wet room if viable or a walk in shower like yours.

    There is also lowered kitchen units for wheelchair users.

    Your neighbour only has to change the tops, or fit adapters to make using taps easier.

    Sometimes you have to help your self.

  • yeah she didnt understand my point that it wasnt the fact i was unhappy with the bathroom just that i would rather be healthy and im amazed she didnt get that

  • Your neighbour is either being 'Insensitive' or not engaging brain before gob in my view.

    take care


  • ha ha ha

    oh that made me laugh and i will opt for the latter

  • that's the one I would have picked too :)

  • You just enjoy your shower and let your neighbour deal with her own problems. Try and be supportive of others but take good care of yourself too. Good luck to you and well done on getting the shower. The world is a very crazy place and we are all part of it. Good I say on the whole. Lots of love xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

  • i agree with you on that

    I always told my children as they were growing up that there are more good people in this world than bad its just that we hear all the bad news.

    thanks for all the love x x x x x

  • As has been said 'Some people look bright before they open their mouth' and 'Better to look an idiot than open your mouth and confirm it'. Sounds like either could apply to your neighbor so enjoy, don't feel guilty and stuff her.

  • To paraphrase something else - want my bathroom, have my disability.

  • yeah !!! that was the point i was trying to make to her when i said i didnt want it i meant i didnt want to be ill...its actually brilliant and makes life easier

    i agree with your other point too and stuff her x

  • There is also over-sensitive and insensitive. You are not the former, but she is the latter.

    Big hugs and glad it makes things so much easier for you xxx

  • i really like that answer and will use that

    thanks for the big hugs your all so great on here

  • Hello Mandy6513, enjoy that shower anything that makes disabled life easier is good. As for your neighbour it does not cost a fortune to adapt taps I did it years ago. I need a shower like you now but due to my window position in the bathroom not sure I could have one, plus its scary when you get the cost for these things as I don't get help from council grants dept. But glad to hear these walk ins with seats are a help, thanks for telling us.

  • tell her to go and get stuffed mandy x

  • ha ha ha

    i couldnt have put it better myself x

  • thats more like it mandy dont for get her what a fab shower it is haha lots of love x

  • sorry missed out to tell thick me x

  • ooooooooo ha ha ha

    your soon as i see her im going to tell her how fantastic it is

    thank you x

  • What a nasty neighbour Mandy. I bet she would love to be in your position - not! Some people are so stupid aren't they? No it is not you, it is her. Keep trucking xx

  • Sounds like she's the one with the negative attitude, not you! You just get on and enjoy your new shower Mandy, and ignore her jealous attitude.

  • You're just unlucky in having an Ar***ole for a neighbour certainly not lucky for having C.O.P.D. tell her you're getting a proper lift fitted that should send her apoplectic.

  • ha ha ha

    love it x

  • hi mandy, wot a stupid women, between a shower and breathing right no contest but if the shower helps u breath better to bathe then whoop enjoy it and ignore her , actually i would open the bathroom window get in the shower and sing my head off. xx sonia x

  • ha ha ha

    oh i love that answer x

  • I too have been advised to get my bathroom converted ,because my wife still works I won,t get a grant but that,s because we are better off financially.So as soon as I,ve decided which bank to rob I,ll have it done,lol.Having read other posts from you I don,t think you are over sensitive just unfortunate with your idiot of a neighbour.Enjoy your showers(I,m jealous) good luck! D. :D

  • well when you rob your bank buy one they are fab

  • some people to me anyway are just plain nasty they think there is no one on this earth more sicker or more disabled than the next person, just ask yourself this has she made moves to get the things to make her life more bearable or is she an old windbag? She can easily and cheaply buy things that slip on your taps to enable easy use if her hands are difficult to turn a tap I got these in the 1990's and then they only cost £2 and you can get them for both style of taps.

  • she is a 58 year old woman who has got some sort of eczema that popped up on her hands a few months ago thats what she is moaning about...yeah its sore but REALLY !!!!!!

  • Hullo Mandy, I did answer but maybe I forgot to press "reply" Thinking about your neighbour, I do think she is an unhappy lady for different reasons. I have had a skin condition which has resolved but remains in my hair. I cant tell you what to do with this lady but try the charm, IF YOU CAN and see what effect it has. Since she is a near neighbour and you will see her. Any odd comment she makes, reply with a friendly remark. It might draw out the nice side, if not the trash bin for her!!!!

  • ha ha ok sounds good to me

  • A number of years ago I was rushed into hospital - sadly I was miscarrying at 17 weeks. I had to stay in hospital and have emergency surgery. After the op I was allowed to leave - it was about 9pm at night. The woman in the bed next to me shouted across to the woman in the bed opposite "Its alright for some - in and out the same day"! I couldnt even comment I was just shellshocked and it had never left me.

    People speak before they think! And the fact is what the hell has it got to do with her? You are not being too sensitive - she is being too rude and uncaring. You do not have to justify your needs to her. You could of course wind her up and just add a comment about "its who you know in this world"!! Take good care, TAD xx

  • oh my gowd....

    what a brainless gonk that woman was to say that....

    we often hear the term sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me......i dont know what fool came up with that because its wrong in every way and its not something i ever told my children as they were growing up.....we have to be so careful of our words they can hurt for life and maybe that woman often thinks about the remark she made and feels ashamed

    i live in wales but my family live in redcar and they visit here so the last time they were here my auntie and uncle popped round to see me...i was in my pjs as i was having a real bad day ....this is no word of a lie, they had been in my house less than 5 minutes when my auntie asked if she could go and play a game on my pc !! i was a little taken back as i thought she had come to see me.......then my uncle who was sitting next to me looked me in the face and said " im so sorry its ended like this for you"

    Ended !!!!!! gowd i didnt die and if i had been having a good day i would have used every swear word ive ever learnt and told him what i think of him

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