An Ode to -----My wife the Gardener-------oh dear, oh dear!

........................................My Wife the gardener

She dug the plot on Monday-

the soil was rich and fine,

She forgot to thaw out dinner

so we went out to dine....

She planted roses Tuesday-

she said they are a must,

They really are quite lovely

but she quite forgot to dust.

On Wednesday it was daisies-

they opened up with the sun,

All whites and pinks and yellow-

but the laundry wasn't done...

The poppies came on Thursday-

a bright and cherry red,

I guess she really was engrossed-

she never made the bed...

It was violets on Friday-

in colours she adores,

It never bothered her at all -

all crumbs upon the floors.

I hired a maid on Saturday -

my week is now complete,

My wife can garden all she wants-

the house will still be neat!

It's nearly lunchtime Sunday-

and I cannot find the maid,

Oh no! I don't believe it!

She's out there WITH THE SPADE!

Richard KOTC


Dig up a plot ready for your Breathe Easy group

Just go along to join or phone BLF Helpline for details 03000 030 555

24 Replies

  • Sounds like my tina,,,hahahhahhahahh,, :)

  • Careful,I might have Tinas number!!!!

  • Brilliant, if I get a maid I could sit here all day :D xxx

  • Nothing changing there then.Hee HEE

  • I would love a maid, and a gardener xx

    Lynne xx

  • Oh yes! I am trying to work that one out.

  • KOTC

    I liked the poem. We had the garden cleared when we had building work. We have lived with 2 mud patches front and back for the last 9 months. Finally thanks to a donation from my father-in-law we are calling in the gardeners to dig over the mud and to put down lawn. The planting will be done to me and my husband. I can't wait and I think I will be just like the lady in the poem (but with oxygen). Keep them coming KOTC, you brighten my day.



  • I can just imagine you both sitting in deck chairs on your new lawn protected by a windbreaker.Supping a glass of iced cranberry juice.Oh those lazy crazy days of summer.Enjoy !

  • You never fail to boost the spirits,King.. So appreciated!

  • I do try to make the sun shine !

  • Just wondering about the maid...ended up in the garden ..with your wife.

  • These things happen to me.!

  • superb poem King, could I have a male maid, my hubby and enjoy your funny tales encluding my 3 sons,

    jan ps feeling better today and I always look for laugh.


  • Well,you don't ask for much.I will see what I can do for you!

  • Loved the poem wish I had freen fingers

  • I willtie some moss around them for you!Hee HEE

  • Well written King.... especially for this time of year ~ says it all ! :-) Have to confess like a few others here ...I would love a maid and a CHEF to cook my favourite meals - not to mention a chauffeur, oh yes, and a groom to look after the horses I'd have..... :-D

  • You don't want much do you? Perhaps I could provide you with a private jet as well!

  • Cheers ...nearly forgot that !

  • Sorry.I have not won the lottery YET

  • I do love your blogs...and your humour.

    Thank you King :-)

    ps Let us know when you get lucky with your lottery and I'll add a Personal Shopper to my wish list :-D

  • You are so kind.

  • Take time with lifes pleasures the boring housework will always be there when the flowers fade, a time for everything and everything in its own time. :-)

  • Surely doing housework is full of lifes pleasures.Oh dear got to go and switch the vacuum cleaner on, her is coming down the garden path

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