Mental State post HA: Not sure if... - British Heart Fou...

British Heart Foundation

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Mental State post HA

12 Replies

Not sure if anyone else has felt this. I would be interested in people's own experiences.

I feel like I'm going to bare my soul so be kind please.

53, worked my arse off all my life in what ever i did, always pushed myself to be tough physically, worked crazy hours, pushed myself even when there have been family moments of grief, moments of celebration, always put my own pride, self belief of mental toughness, getting the job done first.

Post heart attack and the days following it, weeks following it I've done a lot of thinking as I've had nothing else to do.

I've realised how stupid I've been, how I could have lost everything, how family, friends have supported me over the last few weeks, those moments when I've said to my wife and daughter "don't disturb me" ,"I'm too busy", how stupid that was to not live in the moment .

How close it could have been to nothingness.

I feel I've changed, infact i believe I'm stronger ,but stronger in the right ways, mentally better in the right ways, my whole focus towards life has shifted to a more appreciative , relaxed, involved , colourful way.

Not sure if I will delete this post but I felt like letting it out.

12 Replies
BeKind28- profile image
BeKind28-

Hello :-)

There is a saying no doubt you will have heard

Everything happens for a reason

You do not always get to know that reason but from your post it says having a heart attack (which is a bit extreme to go and do ) but it has made you realise what is most important in life so out of a bad situation something good has come from it :-)

You will be able to now share precious time with your family :-)

I am so pleased that you have realised and I am sure your family as well as yourself are going to benefit from your second chance :-)

Happy New Year :-) x

in reply toBeKind28-

BeKind28- what you've said is so true and have a beautiful new year too. You are as its been mentioned in another post an absolute legend for giving your advice and thoughts :)

BeKind28- profile image
BeKind28- in reply to

Thank you :-) x

Healthyheart1 profile image
Healthyheart1

What a wonderful uplifting post. Thank you for helping me see some times I'm selfish when I think about all the things wrong in my life when I should be concentrating on what I have and what's in front of me. Regards Sheena all the best for 2024

trafar profile image
trafar

Pretty much the same as me, before my heart attack was working 10-12 hour days but what this has taught me is that at work I am but a number as they have not contacted me at all to see how I was doing (lots of work colleagues did but not HR or management) they only contacted me when my certificate was about to run out! Today marks the day of my return and I will no longer be working silly hours as my family need me far more than any job and as a colleague used to say to me prior to this event “no job will ever love you back”.

in reply totrafar

trafar I hope it goes well for you today and it's so true what you said. Wishing you the best.

LSCE profile image
LSCE

HI Baly, I think many will relate to your story, including myself. Enjoy your new outlook on life. Wishing you all the best.

Traveldreams profile image
Traveldreams

I think any major health issues make you reflect on your previous life choices.

I think you should remember that while you’re aware they’re no longer right for you now, at the time you were doing the best that you could for then.

I’m sure your family and friends recognise that.

I think having heart issues or other major health problems take away the safety net of feeling like you have another 30 years to wind down. I swear I’ve gone from a middle age view to elderly overnight.

Keep sharing with strangers, I’ve found that I can put things out here that I wouldn’t want to worry my family with.

All the best!

Bananacar profile image
Bananacar

The one thing that having a serious heart condition has taught me is to appreciate what I've got every day, don't live for tomorrow or next week or the day you win the lottery. Be kind to yourself and don't feel guilty for feeling happy. You can't do anything about the rest of the world so look after yourself and yours and enjoy your life, you've earned it!

Britomartis29 profile image
Britomartis29

Baly_2023 I agree, your post is very helpful to think over, and I recognize myself in it. You were making the best decisions at the time, so please don't blame yourself. It is great to be the person who always gets it done! Well done. But now you can also be this new person, the person who is there for them and present to the moment with them. You've found a new way to be with them now; that's lucky too. Congratulations both on your former accomplishments and on the new, different kind ahead of you.

Me, I'm trying to appreciate every day a lot more too, since the 2022-2023 heart scares. Good luck in 2024, everyone.

Coper10 profile image
Coper10

After my unexpected and major heart operation, I found I had a new appreciation of life and of the smallest things. Reflecting afterwards, I was thankful that I had gone through my experience as it did ground me. I don't always succeed but do really try to live in the here and now. Life and my family are prescious and I want to make the most of them.

Noodlesalad profile image
Noodlesalad

You have come through and back from a major life changing event, you're amazing and now have the chance and vision to go forward with true strength and happiness. I'm sure we all reflect on what we could have done better especially with our loved ones who are so precious to us.

You're now a new you and you will continue to grow in strength and I'm sure you're family are just happy you made it .

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