Stress and how it nearly killed me an... - British Heart Fou...

British Heart Foundation

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Stress and how it nearly killed me and how it now costs me sleep.

Khonkaen profile image
32 Replies

Prior to my heart attack I thought I was doing okay, perhaps I didn't exercise enough, but I had allowed stress to rule my life more and more.

I started a thread about food designed to get people's views on what they eat and what they thought was good for them. However, this soon turned into a stress generated argument with doubt cast on other people's views.

We need to understand that most of us are quite vulnerable to stress and need to help keep levels down. IMO, what we eat, aside from processed food is first of all a matter of taste and then what suits the individual.

This forum needs to be a calming informative place to be, where you put your veiwpoint forward and then reads those from others.

There is enough anger going around in the world without us adding to it. Not to mention Brexit...."I told you not to mention Brexit"!! (Benny Hill style)

I now have insomnia big time anyone got any organic tips as I am still on Lora-ze-pam and would not to be.

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Khonkaen profile image
Khonkaen
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32 Replies
Adaboo profile image
Adaboo

Have you ever tried good old fashioned camomile tea? Need 2 bags and let it steep for a while. It’s helped me no end with sleeping in the past. Maybe worth a try. 🤞🤞

Khonkaen profile image
Khonkaen in reply toAdaboo

Just bought some, will let you know but thanks.

There is a very easy way to get to sleep....try to sleep on a long thin pole...you soon drop off!!!

Adaboo profile image
Adaboo in reply toKhonkaen

Haha, brilliant 😅

Khonkaen profile image
Khonkaen in reply toAdaboo

Went the whole hog last night, hot shower, camomile tea and a pill, then turned in at 10pm, slept through until 7.30. With a pee break, feel fab this morning.

This insomnia has just reared it's ugly head of late, just another stage in this strange rollercoaster illness.

"It's as frustrating as a one-legged man at an arse kicking contest." !!

Adaboo profile image
Adaboo in reply toKhonkaen

Woohoo! Excellent! So glad your feeling fab! I had the dog up and down all night so hardly got any sleep. Maybe we swapped 😅😅

Khonkaen profile image
Khonkaen in reply toAdaboo

We are seriously thinking about getting a dog, however will live half the year in Portugal and half in Thailand, but have a friend with dogs in Portugal who could add ours to his collection when we are not there.

in reply toKhonkaen

You sound as if you are either a millionaire jet set or someone, who happened to have a life in two separate countries. You do realise that you only have one "person".

Having said that, anybody would be envious of your "jet set lifestyle".

It's hard to believe you are "stressed" having such an active lifestyle. Am I assuming correctly that you couldn't make up your mind if you'd prefer to retire in one country and ended up living in two countries?

Khonkaen profile image
Khonkaen in reply to

Millionaire? First of all, if you own a house in the UK, I can guarantee, my 2 houses have a value around half yours. Even if you don't have a mortgage, my annual living costs for both honses are slightly less too, including our annual flights. I wouldn't change with anyone, but there are stresses and I inheritted my mother's worrying/stress riden disposition. I always envied my dad who survived the war and was "living on borrowed time" and for the next 60 years, he lived his life that way.

"Active" implies walking, sport, a life full of physical activities, not so, until HA day, cars trucks, scooters and motorcycle don't give one much exercise.

As a younger man I used to be into sports, rugby, climbing, karate and later tennis, then Mr Osteoarthritis in my knee came along and I was too lazy to oevrcome, so I paid the price.

But first I recognise my shortcomings and am determined to remedy them. I was remarried 10 years and that is not enough with this most delightful woman.

So maybe I am on borrowed time now and should my life that way.

..and yes Adaboo, pets are a great destresser.

in reply toKhonkaen

HDs seem to be largely age-related, not entirely it's because what you did or didn't. It seems to hit older people, equally.

You are not living on "borrowed time".

You simply entered a new chapter in your life.

Your new journey has begun!

"life is not for Sissies!" a Cardiologist says.

We all need to be brave, and you have been doing that well.

Please keep up with the Great work! :)

Khonkaen profile image
Khonkaen in reply to

Not sure I understand the first para.

Well had I not be so close to a big heart hospital and in the company of someone who could get me there and explain, I may have died.

My dad lived through WW2 and many of his fellow combattants didn't, so "living on borrowed time" applies to us both in a melodramatic way.

My point is that he lived his life to the full and didn't take a whole lot for granted, he was contented with his lot and my mother wasn't.

Starting anew chapter absolutely and a bit of heart pain to keep me remided?

Brave, not me, a big girls blouse most of the time? Just looking for answers.

Actaully your cardiologist stole that from Buddha "The first nobel truth"

in reply toKhonkaen

Hi,

It could be a gender difference. . . Maybe, that was your mother's "coping strategy", I wonder? It's not nice for you to listen to her grievances all the time, though. . .That's hard.

Whilst I would not say, it would apply to your parents, certainly, it gives me some useful insight. I should be careful as to what I would say from now on. :)

Yes, you are brave based on what you commented i.e. making lifestyle changes, exploring and asking for answers. . . You haven't given up on life. You're moving forward, no matter how hard it is.

Thank you for sharing.

Khonkaen profile image
Khonkaen in reply to

I don't see myself as brave at all, quite the opposite, this is the survival instinct kicking in. I changed my diet without any discomfort at all, through a "do or die" belief and began enjoying the new food straight away. I am an engineer, indeed a control systems engineer (old school), so have a highly logical mind and find it hard to understand how a person can carry on a lifestyle that will/may curtail or even end their life.

I have a friend who was diagnosed with diabetes and he carried on drinking and smoking saying "life is not worth living with such changes", He did eventually change (after I called him an idiot, or a word to that effect) and although once a picometre away from death, he is still alive today.

I was in hospital a few decades back with something quite trivial and saw a guy come back from theatre where we knew he had had a cancerous lung removed. He woke up and called me over, "could you help me up and into the TV room" "what! why?" "I need a cigarette". Now I am not a smoker, gave it up age 14, but you see I don't get that.

Maybe I am a little further down the evolutionary chain and my survival instinct is still strong? Or maybe I enjoy life?

As someone else said..."this is chapter II"

in reply toKhonkaen

A massive dose of positivity!

It's always nice when someone says what he thinks.

Totally inspiring.

Thank you. :)

Adaboo profile image
Adaboo in reply toKhonkaen

Dogs are just the best destressor ( that’s a new word 😅) I have 2 rescue lurchers. Couldn’t be without them now.

Craggy70 profile image
Craggy70 in reply toAdaboo

Just had a minor stroke,Lost my two dogs (a lurcher and a terrier)earlier in the year after 14 years,but got a rescue cat called Edward,he is a great relaxing influence.🐆

hutch123 profile image
hutch123

A mug of hot milk works for me and reading a good book relaxes me. I think stress is really harmful to health not just cardiac health.

Janma123 profile image
Janma123

We have almost completely cut out caffeine at home and it has made a huge difference to sleeping and general well-being levels.

Apart from that a good balanced diet and fresh air and company all contribute!

Best wishes

Khonkaen profile image
Khonkaen in reply toJanma123

I haven't touched fizzy drinks for many years and started drink decaffinated coffee the day after my HA, that was 5-6 months ago so maybe my body is aclimatised. I drink one cup of weak tea per day so my caffine intake is minimal. I walk in the fresh air of the Portuguese countryside about 2-5km/day and eat well, so should sleep well. However, I have been following all the BS news about Brexit, Climate Change, Trump, etc and must stop doing that. I hate the BBC but seem compelled to watch their crap. Must stop doing that.

I think the routine, hot shower, camomile tea and fixed bedtime might be the answer, will try it again. I am dyslexic, so don't read.

Routemaster profile image
Routemaster in reply toKhonkaen

I was advised by hospital to drink water last thing.

I love my caffeine but my evening coffee drink is usually a cappuccino as I reckon that the milky part is good for sleep!

Have you tried audiobooks? Several of my family are dyslexic and love them. Mind you, that is like watching television in bed. You can fall asleep while the book or programme is still playing!

Khonkaen profile image
Khonkaen in reply toRoutemaster

Funny you should say that, when our kids were young we used to drive down through France every year and had a couple of Noddy CD-books narated by Richard Briers. It used to send the kids to sleep and relax me when I was driving, though with 100% concentration. I may look to see if I can download them now. Get a teach-yourself- Portuguese, that will get me to sleep....."desculpe a alguem portugues"

Routemaster profile image
Routemaster in reply toKhonkaen

Would be far too challenging for me!

Khonkaen profile image
Khonkaen in reply toRoutemaster

......I have to admit I would listen to my Noddy CDs even when I was on my own. I am looking for a place I can download them now.

Kimkat profile image
Kimkat

I’ve tried everything from spraying the pillow with lavender to hot milk to meditating to camomile tea, once I’ve had approximately three hours, that’s me awake on and off for the rest of the night, drives me crazy 😫

Khonkaen profile image
Khonkaen in reply toKimkat

That's tough Kimkat, I have had it for only a few days, are you taking any sleep-anxiet medication? What do you think keeps you awake and for how long have you had the problem,

Kimkat profile image
Kimkat in reply toKhonkaen

I’ve been like this for years to be honest. It’s probably due to my overactive/underactive thyroid plus hitting early menopause and partially stress due to the above haha. The only time I sleep for six hours plus if I take zopiclone and I only resort to taking half of one of those when I’m absolutely desperate for sleep, which averages to around every 2-3 months. I’m very aware how additive they are, so I won’t take them on a regular basis.

Khonkaen profile image
Khonkaen in reply toKimkat

For a long time before my HA I would typically go to bed at 12 or 1am and wake up at around 6, so that is around 5 hours, given the dropping off period. That in itself is not good, but I generally felt okay and knew I would always get off to sleep, but now it is a waiting game.

Lack of sleep is not good for the heart and maybe that was a contributing factor, so now it has to be fixed.

The main aim for me is to get and act on information that prevents a second heart attack within the next 15-20 years.

It's also worth developing some new hobbies if you haven't got one already. It's unhealthy to over-focus on the disease.

We all need some enjoyment /distraction, to reward ourselves in our hard earned senior years as heartie survivors/warriors!

This is the time to give yourself a permission to make yourself happy before pleasing anybody else.

Craggy70 profile image
Craggy70

Hi,have you tried meditation,it works for me.It is worth the initial learning period.🙏

Khonkaen profile image
Khonkaen in reply toCraggy70

Where did you learn how to do this?

Craggy70 profile image
Craggy70 in reply toKhonkaen

I learnt 40 years ago with T.M.But today you can do it online with Headspace,do try it.

Khonkaen profile image
Khonkaen in reply toCraggy70

Can you provide a link pls?

Craggy70 profile image
Craggy70 in reply toKhonkaen

Just google Headspace or get the app.

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