does any other father of children with auti... - Autism Support
does any other father of children with autism feel angry with the world. not your family but with society in l? why do we think like this
Do you mean in regards to protecting your children from the horrid stuff and people whilst trying to integrate them into a world that is far from ideal? I'm sorry that I seem to have trouble with writing what I mean but I hope you can understand me. A small word of caution though, a yes from you will open my floodgates as this is something that torments me an awful lot.
sorry rosie but thats exactly what i mean. i think for mhaving. a child with autism
is very humbling it gives me a strong sence of whats. important. i get very anoied when i constantly annoyed when people get upset and yes war violence over pety things.
Not fully understanding you Rosie. Some of your words are surprising to me. Integrate. Floodgates. I am legally trained. And I am from a place where integration is absolutely important. I have cared for and loved 17 children. The word floodgates was created by Lord Denning because of his fear of a fair decision. We can talk more.
I know that my husband often questions 'what kind of world have we brought our children into?' with so many news stories of wars, violence, gangs & drugs about. Our world is constantly changing & you do sometimes have to ask if it's for better or worse :/
couldnt agree more springsong
Hi! I always thought that nothing worse could happen to me than having a disabled child. The older, or should I say the more mature, I became the more I realized how selfish and completely B.S. that statement is.My son is now 30 and lives with me.Although my wife and I worked as a team to raise and educate him, our young marriage could not survive a two year old that screamed almost now stop and seemed to be ripping himself apart from the inside.I have never blamed society. It gave us everything we need, meds, good schools, great teachers. I am starting to ramble,Sorry. I will bring this to a close. I get mad when I see how today's society treats disabled people, people without means or options, are pushed into a dark corner and told to wait for help. Our priority are skewed. We should all be angry at that.
thanks for your reply bill. you know its so strange to hear the thought of others oin this situation because its like looking in the mirror. very. best to you and your son.
Thank you Bill for that. I feel privileged to have been given a close up of your family. And you can share mine too. I was baby sitting my Gran son 3 year old O and I am demented about how he will do in the future. But you are a good person Bill. Nite for now. We'll talk again.
Hello,
You are in a high stress position of having to bring up a child with difficulties who you want to help and protect but know you can't always do so. When a child has a 'meltdown', for example, it is sometimes difficult for the parent to understand what the problem is and what triggered, or how to make they're loved one feel better. This is coupled with the issue that the world is beginning to appear as a more dangerous place than it once was, meaning you are scared of seeing your child get hurt, especially because he/she already has difficulties which makes them more vulnerable. You may be experiencing concerns about how she/he will cope when their older. This high stress is likely to cause you to have mixed emotions and yes, anger. It doesn't make you a bad person - so please don't feel guilt about your emotions I know some parents do.
I don't know how far your son or daughter is on the spectrum, or how old they are, what the 'experts' think. But... you're going to be fine, all of you. There will be challenges, there may be a mixture of ups and downs for the next couple of years, times when you feel like you can't cope of course you will, but there is a brighter future ahead - at the very least it gets easier. There is a lot of myths about ASD even in terms of what the experts think. Many that I disagree with because the condition comes in all shapes, sizes and colours so to speak. The stereotypical belief about what autism is is just one small part of the spectrum, with some similarities to real life, but that's where it ends.
Many children, with just the right understanding and support to help accommodate them for the wider world, will achieve their goals, some even proving the experts wrong. I am sure that, as someone who was once diagnosed, that very few people could believe now that I would eventually do A levels now, at 18, and set off to Uni, or that, in our leaver's assembly, I would be given an award for the nicest girl in year 13, in my school house (which was voted by my peers), but I did. I can't predict where your son or daughter is heading and I won't try to insult you by doing so because I have very limited knowledge. I am merely saying, don't underestimate a child. Any child - on the spectrum or not. Because they are far more aware than people think they are or give them credit for. They are not naive to the dangers in the world, if parents explain to them, honestly but tactfully, that some people are bad, so they should be careful and stick to people they know, parents are amazed at the maturity of which they handful the situation, and they will be better equipped for looking after themselves as they get older and start to show interest in exploring the world - to look after themselves. But I think, and this is only my opinion, that parents need to try and be as honest as possible because if they are old enough to ask questions, surely by, logical sense, they are old enough to get an answer, and deserve one. This would also avoid the added confusion as the child gets older and becomes more aware anyway. Anyway, that's only my own philosophy and bias coming in - and it appears I have started rambling. 
All I'm saying is though, is that usually, it's never as bad as you think it's going to be.
I guess you should acknowledge and accept your anger, don't reject it or over think it, just accept it as being normal, because it is; and if you bring your child up with good intentions and do all anyone can ask of you - your best, then I KNOW you'll do well, because you sound like a very loving parent, and that's all, whether they are on the spectrum or not, a child really needs. That, and understanding. xxxx
realy enjoyed reading your post. my son is 6 and a haplf he was diagnosed with asd just under a year ago and attends a sen school hes doing great there. my daughter is 3 in a bit shes is gong through statementing and diagnosis process at this time she also has a place at nursery at the same school starting in sept. tell u a funny little story that kind of explains what i mean by my question. by where i live theres a house that is used by sort of outreach christian group. know ive never been a religious. so when ever they knocked at my door i politely told them i am not religious. one time they knocked the got it if thers a god how do u explain autism or disabilities etc.... needless to say they left with there tail between there legs me feeling guilty. like i said my anger is well with the world my family is my life worts and all. thank you for your reply brill to listen to your story
Just nice to read that
Funkyfairy, you never cease to amaze me with your insights which are so easy for even me (not the brightest button) to understand. You have an extraordinary talent for being able to explain feelings and actions without being (for want of a better term) a know it all, although, heaven knows, you have the right to be one. You have great compassion and kindness and in my opinion you would be an excellent councillor and ambassador and help us that have little idea of autism or Aspergers to better understand the condition. Thanks for being you.
As for the world we bring our children into Ohthejoy, yes it's cruel and nasty but maybe it will be one of our children that will change the word for the better. Let's hope so.
love it tell you even with autism they will do a better job
I'm a Grand Dad. I feel angry that my children try to avoid the obvious signs & facts. But I legally have no control.
aye
