I think I last wrote about my mum on Tuesday or Wednesday, about increasing breathlessness etc.. We had discussed her final wishes, she didn't want to go in hospital particularly, and wanted to die at home. I thought we had got to that point and it was kinder to let her go.
On Wednesday morning, she was so ill, I was expecting her heart to give out at anytime. Her sats were 80 even on oxygen. Our community matron came and called an ambulance, mums sats were dropping. Jackie, our matron, said she hadn't reached the point of no return as yet, but needed help urgently. She was aware of mums wishes, but mum agreed to go in. Jackie said to inform hospital staff of mums wish not to resuscitate and the fact she wanted to die at home. Apparently they can organise a rapid discharge to get mum home if she wasnt responding to treatment.
I was so scared.
She was taken to the resus room at a&e, given more nebulisers and iv steroids, and she settled a little.
She was admitted to the chest ward, last time she was admitted, it was a surgical ward and the staff didn't have a clue about copd, and was just left for hours without being monitored. I was worried it would happen again, but after explaining this to the dr, she agreed she needed to be on chest ward.
Obviously I couldn't stay with her all night, as much as I wanted to, so spent Wednesday night waiting for the phone to ring to say she had deteriorated and to come urgently.
I went to see her at visiting time, and there she was sat out of bed, grinning at me. She could speak and barely used her oxygen while I was there, I didn't know whether to laugh or cry. She might even be able to go to the church for the wedding, a couple of hours leave from hospital. Not sure how as she still has a drip up, but we will see what dr says today.
It looks like the bugger will be here a little while longer, thank God.
Thank you for all your prayers and good wishes, it really helped me
Val xxxx