a minute agonewn
i made contact with the suggested options but no one really gets anorexia like i do... not even professionals. Unfortunately for me my journey has shown me everything that happened and what for me it's about. I can't tell you? You'd have to be mad to leave your bubble believe me.
After a number of stressful weeks that i understand to be part of day to day living but which i had no life experiences of and more than to be expected, well living out of the safety bubble anorexia gave me proved to much and i took an overdose.
I was kept in hospital overnight someone from mental health spoke to me assured me of more support and i went home. I attempted to call psychologist or old coordinator noone there. I have heard from psychologist who said i could call intensive team and they woukd call me maybe visit and check on me...that was Tuesday. I rang them Tuesday evening didn't call back. I called wednesday in early hours they called me a someone else when o repeatedly said no that isn't my name. Everyone constantly wants to know where i am, with who and going where. When i tried to call yesterday afternoon to check something with psychologist as they are away for weeks soon. Well the team at that building didn't even answer call and then when it did they cut me off!
It seems they think that having all life can throw at me will force me to cope and get in with it but like i say i doubt any know my experience quite like me or quite how far up shit creek i am without a paddle!
So that is how the mental health team have helped me. I was told specialists won't accept me as bmi too high! At 19 something!!! Basically saying i am fat after how hard i have fought to come this far and learn to eat. Recovery has made my life unbelievably harder and i don't know what else to say...really i don't
i have repeatedly been told by psychologist it will be ok which i now wonder if was genuine cos she thought /thinks managing it =recovery when that is worse th an acute faze or she has neen through it and knows it will be ok iiin end (hard to see right now how at all i survive ) or she been through it knows how shit it is and wanted someone else to tread this path too as some kind if warped joke? To meet someone who gets it too maybe...who knows...i just smile anyway...she's lucky she makes me laugh is all i can say! But where this is all going. ...i don't know
Best wishes, love and light x