Help ! :(

I recently got given my first meal plan but I feel very anxious about it for many reasons; it's not by a special dietitian, it's by my therapist. She specializes in anorexia and spoke to a dietitian about it but she actually made it up herself and at the beginning of the session tricked me into telling her what I think a 'normal' day of eating is for someone my age... then when we came to the meal plan she said 'well you think this is normal' and put down normal size meals on EVERY meal- she tried to quadruple my breakfast, and add juice!!! Also, carbs are very much a fear of mine and haven't eaten them in around 3 months, and she wants me to eat 2 slices of bread at lunch, with a full fat yoghurt and fruit even though she KNOWS I don't normally even eat lunch, and a ( she specifically said this to my mum when I was there) 'normal' amount of rice / potatoes at dinner- is this a bit extreme for my first meal plan? I've been eating less than 300 calories recently and she knows that- she told me to record a food diary but challenged me saying I have to have lunch so I included that in my food diary even though it was SO hard, then sent it to the dietitian saying it's what I normally eat but it wasn't because she has already forced me to increase by eating lunch. Some please help- she's trying to triple my calories, a week after being diagnosed and she's had no input from the actual eating disorder clinic ( I've got an appointment with them in 1 1/2 weeks). What do I do? She's making me have things at school and this is really distracting me and it's 2 months until my GCSE's, I cannot be the only one thinking this is outrageous :(

3 Replies

  • Hi Allypally, I think this "Counsellor" is making far too high demands on you, just a week after being Diagnosed with what I presume to be be Anorexia Nervosa? It sounds like AN as I have been a suffer of the insidious, cruel illness for many years! It took me into almost loosing my my life, when my vital Organs shut-down, I had pneumonia, Septicaemia (Blood poisoning) , Respiratory Failure. I was in Intensive Care of a Life Support Machine & spent over a Month in hospital!! Anorexia cannot be under-estimated, it DOES Kill us, if we don"t do something towards "Recovering!" from it!

    You poor lamb (you sound really young?!) my heart truly goes out to you, as I know how frightened you must be feeling right now?!!!!

    I am under the care of a Specialised High-Risk Eating Disorder Mental Health Team @ a Psychiatric Hospital, since admission to Intensive Care, when I almost did"nt make it!

    I do feel this person has put terrifying demands on you for your first session? I see a "Specialised Dietitian", I saw her several times to build up a "Trust!" before devising My Meal Plan, between us, what I felt comfortable eating ect. & agreeing to do!

    You know in your heart you cannot possibly "Survive!" on 300 cals per day but we have to mentally prepare our Brain to increase our "Food In-take", get to the Root of Anorexia, where the "Trigger Points are" ect. before we can even contemplate such a drastic change in Eating Habits?

    Bless you, you must be terrified, my heart goes out to you! I am not agreeing obviously with you sticking to your old form of behaviour of eating just 300 cals a day, as you will end up loosing so much weight, there is a likely-hood of them taking you into hospital as an In-patient, to Chronic Eating Disorder Ward in Psychiatric Hospital, trust me when I say this You honestly don"t want to end up in one of those Wards!! They are terrifying for someone mature in age like myself who has had Anorexia for many, many years (too many!).

    However I would hate to see you go down the same route as I did & end up almost loosing my life before co-operating with the Specialised High-Risk Eating Disorder Team?! I can totally empathise & sympathise just how terrified you are feeling @ this moment in time.

    Can"t you make an Appointment with the Specialised Eating Disorder Dietitian yourself and ask her/him to devise and Eating Plan between you that increases your calories, slowly & not leaving you feel so terrified & even more out of control! As you are aware Anorexia eventually Controls our mind as opposed to us controlling our own mind!!

    There is far too much for me to go into with you on this Post but if you would like to Private Message me, I would be more than happy to answer any questions you may have or try & support you if I possibly can, in any way possible?!

    I do feel this Counsellor has almost frightened you away, asking what seems to be the impossible of you @ this stage, after just one session!!!

    Recovery is NOT easy but it is achievable, given the correct support of the right people!!

    I wish you all the Luck in the world. Please feel free to PM me if you think I can be of some help to you?

    In my thoughts and prayers Allypally,

    God bless

    Bettybaby XXX

  • Can fully understand your terror - however, unless you do something quickly you are going to cause long term damage to your health - and you are more valuable than that. I know that the amounts may seem humendous to you - but you have to realize that the anorexia tells lies - you need balance in your diet - and carbs are part of this - also - all dieticians in EDs would advise 3 meals daily - to include lunch. Maybe you need to talk to your counsellor and set a more realistic goal - may be just one slice of bread to start with - and may be build up to full portions - if you are going to recover - and are going to be able to continue to do well with your exam preparation - you are going to need nourishment - your anorexia will tell you that you the advice is wrong - and that everything is too much - but to become healthy again you are at some point going to have to trust the experts - but you will need support - these feelings you are are automatic and we all have them - and its only with help and a lot of professional support to look at the issues behind your struggles - that you will cope with all that recovery requires. BUT from experience - its only by accepting what others tell you - and at the end of the day EATING - that you will get better - and you will become healthy - and free to live a happy and fulfilling life again. My thoughts are with you.

  • Hi, I've been dwelling over this and I feel that your therapist has been very caring and professional. She has taken the time and the trouble to seek advice from a qualified person. I feel too that the amount that she is asking you to eat is probably a minimum you need in order to give your brain enough fuel to think properly.

    My experience of the specialist eating disorders people is that their demands will be more than this meal plan. They will give you support of course but in the end you will need to change and eat more in order to recover.

    So please act now before you do any more damage to yourself. I know it is easier said than done but it is the only way.

    all the best

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