This is going to sound wimpish or ungrateful or both.
I had a successful Ablation in May this year.
My EP is no doubt very good at what he does but on the day of the procedure he was very matter of fact and did not really make any attempt to show any empathy or reassure me. I was the only patient who didn't get a visit the next day from their EP to inform them how it had gone.I had a follow up with him 4 months later and he was just the same.
Perhaps he doesn't like me! or perhaps it is asking too much for a little empathy and the occasional reassuring smile from someone in his position?
Written by
SirBeatalot
To view profiles and participate in discussions please or .
Sadly some of the best surgeons and electrophysiologists seem to have had a charisma bypass during training. The guy that did my prostatectomy was one but he saved my life so I can forgive him for his other shortcomings. Nobody can be good at everything. I once met a top neurosurgeon who also made exquisite scratch built model cars who appeared to have zero social skills. Seems to go with the territory.
I agree with Bob, most consultants aren't really interested in our lives, or how we are feeling emotionally and are just doing their job. If they did care too much, I guess it could affect their performance and be draining for them. On the other side you don't know what was going on in your consultants life, someone close to him may have died and he may have dragged himself in to the hospital just to do your procedure. Most importantly, how lucky are you to have had a successful ablation.
Absolutely, as I said at the start I might be seen as ungrateful but that's not the case, it's just difficult making a nuanced point.
Hi SirBeatalot, That's very disappointing. While we can't insist on a bedside manner or empathy, to me it's 50% of our recovery to know that not only was a procedure successful but that there was a level of empathy and support. But all in the medical profession are just human beings with training. Some take on board the complete package and are the very best in their profession. Others like this poor example are mediocre. And that's the word I'd keep in my head every time the thought of lack of empathy annoyed me. He was just mediocre! Doesn't mean he couldn't, or didn't carry out your procedure properly or successfully, just that he was only half of the package.
My wife has consulted with a few females and says they are no better really same mix as male consultants - sometimes women are even harder on women. I, on the other hand have had great relationships and empathy with the women consultants I have dealt with - it’s my charm I am sure! 🤣
I was talking to an Ortopaedic Surgeon about my poorly knee a few months back (yes, I'm a mess! 🥴) and he asked me who had performed an Arthroscopy in about 2004. I said I couldn't remember, but he was an extremely grumpy man.
He named him straight off! 😀
My ablation was successful and the Ep was very good, but I found that he couldn't understand why I was so anxious and needed things explaining when I had my 3 month review. He sort of said just get on with my life, which I get and I'm trying to...But when something like this happens to you for the first time, that was completely unexpected it can be very upsetting.
Also he couldn't really make eye contact with me, a bit eccentric in a way and direct.
On a good note if I emailed his secretary I'd get a reply from him either the same day or day after. Probably thinks not her again!
I guess they do loads of these procedures every day.
You got a follow up at 4 months, what a luxury! Sixteen months later I guess my EP has totally forgotten about me. I never even met him once. Wonder if he was hot on empathy, I'll never know now.
I suppose he doesn't need to know. I am though. I am absolutely fine.
The other day I was sorting out one of my curtain tracks and putting new hooks on as the others were breaking and I thought to myself that a couple of years ago I would have got my son to do that.
Thank you for replying. Funnily enough my EP 's secretary is very good, she will always listen and show interest at what is being said.I think in your situation i would have phoned your EP 's secretary and requested some contact.
Well, I was doing alright so I couldn't see any reason to ask to see him. Perhaps I was glad he was doing a great job with his ablations and not wasting time on seeing people like me.
I know what you mean about there sometimes being an imbalance of interpersonal and technical skills in many highly-demanding professions. I had a video consult with my EP regarding a projected ablation in January. He was actually somewhat personable and listened to my questions and concerns but he was very categorical and definite about things like Afib not needing a pace maker although my HR is around 45 BPM most of time. I got that he is a nerdy type, hopefully brilliantly-functional at his job but not interested in friendly banter. BTW, facing a probably ablation, it's great to hear of so many successful procedures here.
I wouldn't take it personally. He was likely far too busy and tired out. In Leicester Glenfield once I was told there was a single cardiologist covering the whole department. Just imagine that!
My father was an Ophthalmologist and of course he was lovely. He had a lot of empathy with his patients but whether or not they were totally aware of it is hard to tell. Working in North Wales and with a strong Black Country accent I suspect few of them could understand a word he said!
Over the years I've come in contact with consultants that were empathic and quite a few that weren't. As long as they are good at their job! Generally whatever I've needed them for I just want to get it over and done with and get out of there 😊 My local doctor now retired was short on the empathy but was an excellent GP, never fobbed you off with the age solution and investigated properly. My current doctor is very nice but I have reservations after she decided to test for a water infection when I had pulmonary oedema and ended up in A&E despite knowing I have Af! Current cardiologist isn't particularly empathic but does answer questions and explain things. Not the same SirBeatalot but have a hug from me x
I don't think you sound wimpish or ungrateful in the least. I recently had a procedure under general anesthetic and the registrar said he would come and see me before I was discharged. He didn't, so off I went home to bed and a couple of hours later the phone went. It was him, to reassure me and tell me exactly what happened. I was in absolute shock and so grateful.
I have been thinking even more about your post. I have had several procedures at the hospital (with the caring registrar) and after each one I have had a questionnaire that includes the questions, amongst others;
How do you feel your were treated today?
Was everything explained to your satisfaction?
Was your pain/discomfort controlled well?
I am sure it is no coincidence that this hospital is rated outstanding.
I am not ungrateful as I indicated at the start of my post and I am not moaning.I merely wondered about the experience of others and whether or not their experience might inform my own.
And I certainly don’t need any lectures from you about being scared and worried, i have been scared and worried many times due to suffering from a serious heart condition which required a quadruple heart bypass in 2017 and of course the symptoms of AF resulting in my ablation in May of this year.
I realise the AF may come back at some point and my heart disease certainly hasn't gone away, so I will no doubt be back in hospital someday in the future when the wonderful people who look after us will no doubt do so again with their usual care and empathy.
Yes i pre warned readers of my post that it might sound ungrateful and hoped that their intelligence would do the rest in understanding that i was not actually ungrateful.
So now you descend to insulting me. Nice. That says it all, I’ll leave it with this thought. It doesnt matter what you or I think may 'sound' ungrateful. It's your EP's skills that matter, and he can't change his demeanour.
I thought on this forum we were patients who could chat as friends and share things that we wouldn't necessarily mention to our Doctors etc without someone taking offence, but I guess not.
I started with an eminent Professor EP who had 25 years experience. Just before he retired he told me there was nothing more he could do for my AF and I was going to have to live with it. I was devastated.
After two other EPs who were quickly head hunted by other hospitals I was placed under the care of my current EP.
Not only has my current EP improved my QOL significantly after a further 4 ablations he also is a wonderful communicator. I only hope he doesn’t also move on.
Boy does this resonate. Despite efforts over the years to appeal to my EP's warmer side,....nothing. However, I know he's good at his game and he's focused on safety and outcomes. This he has proven through his recommendations and constant availability to answer the urgent questions....albeit, in monosyllabic, non-descriptive single phrase answers. I can try to engage him in technical discussions of the finer points of cardiac electrophysiology or joke around a bit but he will not go there....I get head nods or stern glares or head shakes. The more I learn about all of this the more I respect his knowledge and the complexity of the decisions he makes. It all really started to make some sense recently after ablation when I realized I literally was a body on a table, one of three on the day that he was attending to. There's simply too much thru-put and volume for him to worry too much about me personally or catering to my need for a warm demeanor. Given high volume EP's are one of it not the biggest success factors for ablation,....I'm okay with that..
Actually my EP could poke me in the eye as long as the ablation was successful. I'm heading for my 4th and I have not had a visit after the procedure with the previous ones, only in clinic much later on. Dont want to sound harsh but... I am so happy for you that your ablation has worked. Keep well and in sinus.
Actually I might be jumping the gun ( hope not) I am only just at the end of the six blanking period and entering winter when my AF seems to be more prevalent so to call it successful might be premature. I actually wish I hadn't mentioned this matter now I seem to have upset some people.
Interesting...I can relate. My story started in January of this year, when I had a visit from an EP while I was hospitalized (and in the Emergency Room) for an Afib episode. The EP was sent by my cardiologist. He came by my bed introduced himself and held his hand, palm up, when I asked about an ablation. He followed that gesture with a comment that I should listen and he should speak. He then lectured me about Afib for under 5 minutes and left. After being successfully converted and discharged, my cardiologist set up an appointment for me to see that EP. I reluctantly agreed, but when he cancelled three times over a period of as many months, I had enough. After some careful research, I reached out to the Administrative assistant of one of the top EP's in the country (at Johns Hopkins Hospital - 1,000 miles from where I live). Within a week, the EP reviewed my medical records and personally called me to discuss my case, indicating that I was a good candidate for an ablation. In less than a week after that, he had me scheduled for an in person pre-ablation consultation with him on the Jan 10th and for an ablation to occur on Jan 11, 2022. I suspect I would still be waiting for an appointment from the original EP. I guess the lesson learned is that all EP's (physicians) are not the same and you don't have to tolerate being treated poorly.
Good to know that you managed to find someone you have confidence in and also someone who you feel is on your side.It never occurred to me to travel outside my area but as you suggest sometimes you have to be proactive to find a solution.
Thanks for your reply and hope all goes well with your ablation, I'm sure it will.
Content on HealthUnlocked does not replace the relationship between you and doctors or other healthcare professionals nor the advice you receive from them.
Never delay seeking advice or dialling emergency services because of something that you have read on HealthUnlocked.
Eventually had consultation with EP and got a bit of a shock.
Permanent AF
I am back again sorry if I wrote this last night.
