Work career finished?

[Grigbey56]

I was wondering how many people here are at work with this condition. I am off sick at the moment and coupled with the anxiety and depression I'm suffering I can see no prospect of ever returning. It is a manual job, a bus mechanic where I drove them as well. I feel my life has ended anyway, I keep having setback after setback and just can't see me ever enjoying anything ever again. I have had some positive days but last night really put paid to that. I'm shivering in fear here.

[wilsond]

Hi grigbey

First of all there are many who continue to work with our condition . We have a bus driver on here who I hope sees your post and can add to that

Are you under the care of an EP or has your cardio discussed all the options available to us on the Crazy Heart Club? It can help to know there's things we can do medically as well as lifestyle to lessen the impact.

Anxiety and AF I find feed each other but things do calm down on both sides with time and support.

Do you have any support formal or informal with your mental health? I think it could help get things in their perspective .I am the worst one for galloping off into the sunset with what I fear so I know easy it is to happen.

Best wishes G

[Grigbey56 in reply to wilsond]

Thanks for your time, I think the biggest problem is that I am sitting here stewing, worrying what might happen ; I ve apparently been referred to a Cardiologist but heard nothing in three weeks. Mentally, I am with the NHS healthy minds which is a phone call every five weeks or so and self help books.

[wilsond in reply to Grigbey56]

Yes time on my hands when I'm worried is not good! Know where you're coming from .Hang on in there

[LordGabriel]

I work full time. I was diagnosed in 2018 but worked throughout. I’m off for a couple of weeks now after my Ablation yesterday but will go back.

My Dad had AF and was a driver. He worked right up to his retirement.

So you gotta get some perspective... it’s hard when first diagnosed.... I felt like it was a death warrant. However you can live a pretty normal life with it and almost forget sometimes! It’ll come for you. It takes time.

[Equish]

I’m sending you good thoughts. My heart goes out to you. I was diagnosed 11 months ago and for the first 3 months was filled with anxieties. Gradually when most symptoms became controlled with medication I relaxed more. I still go to work and actually find it better to work as it fills my mind with other thoughts apart from AF. I hope it gets better for you and you get back to work. I have decided to try and not let this condition rule me and spoil the rest of my life. It’s not that easy I know but it’s my aim. Sending Big hugs to you.

[Letofeyd]

I understand your feelings.

I just started with this 6 weeks ago and I feel very anxious and a bit adrift. Doctors sent me to emergency, but also say, "you aren't going to die of this".

They say a drug is no big deal, but then they say don't stop or you can suffer "sudden death".

They talk scarily about heart attack and stroke, but then leave you alone for weeks.

Very mixed messages, a perceived lack of urgency to solve it, and the sense of utter helplessness is pretty difficult to handle at first.

I can only say that I have bad nights, too, when I wake up with weird feelings in my body that I don't know how to interpret.

(I am a woman going through menopause to boot, so it is a big mess!😉)

I spend hours awake in the dark, trying to breathe deeply and stay calm, but my thoughts are on fire with fear that I am ignoring something serious.

Last night was one of the bad ones.

I am also not working, but I do try to keep busy and live as normally as possible, or my mind would eat me alive with desperate and dire thoughts.

So I garden, make stuff, volunteer...just fill my day with useful diversions.

I find I do forget about it if I an busy. It is a huge relief.

If you cannot work, or do not feel like working, your driving skills could be useful to food banks, meals on wheels or local charities.

You could still keep safe and isolated but help others and yourself.

Maybe that would raise your spirits and keep your mind off this while you go through the referral process?

One thing this forum has made me realise is that this isn't going to get sorted for either of us in a hurry, so we need to help ourselves.

Stay strong.🌺

[Grigbey56 in reply to Letofeyd]

Me stay strong? I have to be strong first, tall order for me sadly.

[Grigbey56 in reply to Letofeyd]

Hmm that was a short reply from me, I must appreciate what other people are going through and you have been through an awful lot. Thanks for taking the time to reply to me.

[Shrek1974 in reply to Letofeyd]

Hi Leftofeyd, No matter what the confusion - the key seems to be anti coagulants. As long as you’re on them for 4weeks onwards the door is more open to procedures such as cardioversion and a heart can beat pretty much as random as it likes - you stand to be safer from blood clots working around your system & creating havoc. The other meds may take time to get right for you but that’s ok as the risks should be offset by the anticoagulants in your system. I hope this makes some sense - my meds changed again recently after 20months and 3 cardioversions - the priority question on the lips of the specialists always seems to be “are you still taking your Rivaroxaban”?. On positive reply they always appear quite relaxed. Good luck & stay strong! 💪💪💪

Steve

[secondtry]

What you describe is not an uncommon stage for this mongrel condition. As Letofyed says you have to play the long game. First off book a private appointment with a cardiologist (if you are still waiting for an NHS appt) and in your spare time take up walking in the countryside twice a day plus a new hobby you have always wanted to do or volunteer for a cause you support.

[shipyard in reply to secondtry]

good advice, I thank you so much, continue to take care of yourself, in my prayers.

please let me know the procedure for how to go about booking a private appointment with a specialist?

[secondtry in reply to shipyard]

Thank you. Booking a private appointment will depend on the system in your country. I am in the UK and just rang up the consultant's private secretary.

[shipyard in reply to secondtry]

Again I thank you for your quick reply to my message,

yes, I am also in the UK Scotland. and my question is do I need to contact my GP to have him write a letter to the private consultant with my medical condition in order to assist the consultant with my present condition? many years past I contacted a private hospital for an appointment and was told that this could only take place after a letter from my GP arrived at the private hospital? have no private insurance and accept all expenses involved, thank you again for giving me your time and patiece.

Warm regards

[secondtry in reply to shipyard]

It is 6 years ago when I first consulted privately and I went to the same cardiologist who treated me when I was in hospital under NHS without involving the GP. I think it would be best though if you started by explaining to your GP the reasons for you wanting to go private. Hopefully, he/she will be supportive and ideally you get an ECG/any other test done first at the surgery to take with you thus saving ££££. If your GP is not supportive (I have had this with other issues as well) then if you have kept records ( and you are entitled to a copy of those held at the surgery) I would book it yourself. The interface between private and NHS medicine has improved a bit but is still not what I would call helpful! Good luck.

[Kaz747]

It can be frustrating and confronting when you are first diagnosed. I had similar feelings to you, wondering if life would ever be “normal” again. I had a lot of problems, in and out of hospital, and had a year off work. My last ablation 18 months ago finally got things under control and I went back to work but then I was made redundant (thanks to Covid). I decided to start my own business so I can be in control. Once you get on the right track you will feel better and more positive again. 😉

[Shrek1974]

Hi Grigby56, I was diagnosed 21months ago & was off work initially while things got settled & my cardioversion was done. I was also in heart failure due to damage caused from not realising I was in AF for so long as I’m quite asymptomatic. 18months & 3 cardioversions later I was informed that my heart is in “normal range” having reversed much of the damage & I was now eligible to try another drug to help keep rhythm after the 3rd procedure - no time off work required this time.... As an operator on a busy power station, my job is reasonably active, 12hour shiftwork & at times very busy & quite physical. There’s been doubts about my future (especially the HF side) but once my head was on track, it’s been all positive. My teammates have been brilliant & supportive though outsiders may not realise at a glance. I know how brutal the workshop environment can be - but (their abuse) it really helped me keep a realistic approach & push on through. There’s no way I’m giving in to this now, I love my job & thankfully received good support to carry on doing it especially initially. Now I need no special treatment & am 100% capable of doing the physical side & the shiftwork. I’m 46 now and wasn’t expecting to see anywhere near 50 at first but recently was told that I should pursue further attempts to stay out of AF as it could cause complications in my 70s or 80s....

It may take a little time to get your head around it but hang in there, you will. And you can carry on! Good luck and stay strong. 💪💪💪

Steve

[Roto]

Some years ago when I was diagnosed with Paf I was self employed..

I didn't have the luxury of someone paying me when I was unable to work..it was tough.. very tough , my standard of living dropped along with long bouts of illness

my benefit claim was rejected after 6 weeks a humiliating business I was deemed not ill enough

even though my bouts of Af lasted between 24 and 30 hours a couple of days a week and I was confined to bed I lived on my ever decreasing savings I could write a book on depression and what it feels like to be written off with no hope and not being the main bread winner

I was a london taxi driver for 20+ years with wife and two teenage children

but thankfully having abalation was my saviour it turned my life around, I didnt go back driving

believe me there's always someone worse of than you no matter what your faced with

and that includes me too ! but I wish you good luck

[Grigbey56 in reply to Roto]

I am sorry that you have been through so much, I m paying the price of having had it too easy for so long and being very cavalier about my precious health. Good on you for your bravery.

[Roto in reply to Grigbey56]

Luck of the draw my friend..it changed my life for the better..

I have have no regrets and I'm able to enjoy a fully worthwhile life...

[Hidden]

I think quite a few people, possibly the majority, are able to work with AF. Joe Biden, apparently, has the condition at 78 and he is likely to be working as President of the US for the next four years it seems.

The most important thing to do at the moment, if you haven’t already, would be to update your employer on the situation and get them “on board”. Get evidence from your GP so that they know what is being told them is accurate. You could also explain your worries to your GP and find out what they think the implications of the condition are for your work. At least, then, you know where you stand.

[Grigbey56 in reply to Hidden]

I have had such a doom laden attitude to life throughout my life that I can't think any other way, thinking I was already grave bound when I turned 50 seven years ago and ruined my life since. I am so full of regret, about absolutely everything.

[cuore]

Wow! Grigbey 56. By my calculations you are 57 which is 20 years younger than I am. I identify with your regret, except I fully regret that I am not 20 years younger. I can't do anything about that except say, looking at the cup half full, "I am going to live another 20 years to 97. "

It's time to turn your doom laden attitude around if you are going to choose to be upbeat. You have a choice to look at life with a cup half full or half empty. What you are saying is you choose to look at the cup half empty and you are not even trying to look at the cup half full. Try it this way: your immediate choice to a situation is the cup is half empty; now immediately counter with your mind how does the situation look half full? You are not allowed to say you can't, so do use your imagination. Your topic is work which is your post. Hint: list all the positive points of returning to work. The mind does marvellous things, especially the imagination.

Let me give you my most current example of my cup full AF. After my third ablation, my EP said I was one of the most complicated cases at the six month persistent stage, and if I had not had an ablation at that stage, I would never have been able to return to sinus which they had to do using cardioversion during the ablation.

Affirmed by the EP that I was one of the most complicated cases and not the most complicated, I still could have shrivelled doom and gloom to the EP, but instead I automatically blurted, " I like to win prizes, but not that one. " That attitude seemed to have worked because a year and a half later, I am still in sinus rhythm.

[Doggiemomma]

We all have regrets. I carry my stupidity & regrets with me & find it difficult to forgive myself, yet I know by my faith that I am forgiven. I've learned from my regrets and I like to think I'm doing a lot better because of them.

Here's a suggestion, if you're willing to try it.

For the next 3 days, choose to do all of these 3 different things--you don't get to pick the 3 things, I'll tell you right here. Of course, you don't have to do anything like this but I'm making a suggestion. If you choose to do this, you can certainly do this for 3 days, right?

1. Only put healthy things in your body to eat and to drink, and that eliminates sugary beverages & alcohol. Just try pure water or herbal tea ...no coffee, no caffeinated beverages. No pastries or sugary treats. No overdoing it with bread, pasta, rice, fried foods etc

2. Do something nice or kind for someone else. Make this a deliberate decision. This could be as simple as going outside if the weather is good & taking a walk, or go to the market & greet someone (from a social distance) & exchange pleasantries. You never know what a positive difference your kindness will make in their lives!

3. Call someone that you know just to say hi and do not let anything negative get past your lips. If someone asks how are you, and they really want to know, do not let anything negative get through your lips. Your reply could be as simple as "I'm hanging in there" ... then talk about something happy or pleasant -- if you have nothing happy or pleasant to say, then talk about flowers or funny pets on TV or tell a cute (clean) joke or two. Appropriate jokes can be found online.

4. Extra -- Take 5 or 10 minutes, set a timer if you wish, relax in a chair, turn off the radio and such, take slow deep breaths through your nose and exhale slowly through your nose,. Silently think of this word: Kindness.

Just some thoughts. Can't hurt, might help.

[Ianc2]

Hi Gribey56

If you are still looking at a private appointment you have a bit of research to do in order to find out who the best person on your locality is and what the name of his or her secretaries /administrators is. If you are not sure, shop around a bit and try and get a few suggestions and find out how much they charge.

I recently had a cataract operation after being told that there was a long waiting list to see the consultant, and then another long waiting list to actually have the operation. I rang around and got a very interesting experience. One private hospital took a week to ring back, were not very keen to give me a price and got quite annoyed when I told them I had had it done while I was waiting for them to get their act together.

Ringing around can be time consuming but in this case I saved about £500 by doing so.

[David1958]

Grigbey56 you have not told us how you got here. How did you get diagnosed with AF? Did you go to the emergency room? What doctors have you seen? This matters because it tells us how long you have been suffering from AF. If it is new to you then it can seem like the world is coming to an end. Anxiety is understandable in this situation. One way to combat anxiety is to learn how to breath deeply. By this I mean extending the inhale and exhale be equal amounts. The ideal is to get the duration of the inhale/exhale cycle of 12 seconds. That would be 6 seconds for the inhale and six seconds for the exhale. You may find it difficult to get that far off the bat. Try for 3 seconds, then four, then 5. Pretty soon you will get to the magical six seconds of inhale followed by six seconds of exhale. By the time you get there, you will no longer be anxious. There is a direct relationship between the amount of breathing you do per minute and your heart rate (and resulting BP). It takes practice to make this become second nature. Best of all, it will cost you nothing.

[Grigbey56 in reply to David1958]

The very first time I felt anything was last year but it just stopped while I was at the hospital, no mention of AF, just told to take aspirin (which I didn't...). Then this year, 3rd October I went to A&E, this time it didn't stop until I had a few doses of Bisoprolol, then they sent me home. My GP confirmed AF and put the fear of God into me (all over the phone, not seen anyone face to face yet), Cardiologist appt on 26th November. Just taking a lot of tablets now. Thanks for the anxiety advice ( I'd had that already mainly due to Covid worry) , it's annoying not being able to go to anybody about that as well, all phone calls and self help books.

[David1958]

Oh, there are plenty of things going on in the world to induce anxiety. Covid 19 pandemic, climate emergency, elections, the list goes on.