First Day of Retirement: Well, I did it... - Advanced Prostate...

Advanced Prostate Cancer

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First Day of Retirement

YostConner profile image
45 Replies

Well, I did it. Friday I told my employer that the cancer and its treatment leave me unable to keep up with the expectations of the job. I was nervous and emotional. I worked for this firm for more than 18 years, and I have good relationships with lots of people. Some people were shocked. Others had expected it to happen. Everyone was supportive. The processes to claim private and SSDI disability income have begun.

I don't know yet how it feels. Today feels like a sick day--except that I am not having to monitor the firm computer all day.

Thanks to everyone here who provided so much support on this when we last discussed it.

Yost.

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YostConner profile image
YostConner
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45 Replies
Darryl profile image
DarrylPartner

Well done. It will likely be several weeks before your time on your own sinks in. Meanwhile, let the multitude of emotions wash over you and past you....you'll undoubtedly go through exhilaration, giddiness and anger and sadness. These will pass in a week or two. Very human response to a mammoth change in your life. Truly, well done.

HalC profile image
HalC

Well done, Yost. I agree with everything Darryl said. I'm sure you're going to be missed terribly by those folks you've worked with for so long. When I retired almost exactly 5 years ago Doug took off a week and helped me ease into it. Thinking of you and wishing you the best.

Dr_WHO profile image
Dr_WHO

Way to go! It is important that you now spend your time focusing on enjoying your life! Trust me, no one ever feels sorry for not putting in the long days at the office. Hopefully the removal of work stress will help you better fight your cancer. Yes, you will not have as much money, but you now can maximize your time with friends and the ones you love.

Welcome to the land of the free! The most precious thing we have is time. It is great that you no longer have to spend it working.

I retired about five years ago when I was 55. Work was moving all research to India and after a couple of trips there to set up the labs I decided to quit and enjoy life. Never regretted it for a minute.

in reply toDr_WHO

Way to go Dr Who !!!!

JamesAtlanta profile image
JamesAtlanta

Congratulations, Yost! You are an inspiration to all of us!

I’m going to retire in Q1 of 2018 after 30-years (I am 56) and feel the same way ... just too hard to work every day and fight PCa. I admit I have been having second thoughts (third thoughts, fourth thoughts...) but your comments and the comments from our other friends on this site help me know I am making the right decision! You made the right decision, too!

Best of luck in retirement!

James

dlestercarlson profile image
dlestercarlson

I retired after being with my employer for about 34 years. I can tell you that it was an emotional time leaving behind all of my friends. And for the first couple of weeks I still felt like I was working. Now, almost 5 years later I could not dream of working again. I am set for live with the money I need. My wife has gotten used to me being home. And I'm enjoying the freedom retirement has given me to enjoy the good things of life.

erjlg3 profile image
erjlg3

Now you will be able to care for YOU Yost. I'm so happy that you will be able to rest when you need to. Ahhhhhh..... I'm breathing a sigh of relief for you. Now I'll send lots of good wishes, good vibes and all good for your disability to go through pronto!

p.s. It was so much harder quitting/ leaving..... after 22 years but I have not regretted it once.

Big hugs,

Jackie

golfwifemom profile image
golfwifemom

Best wishes to you as you settle in to this new part of your journey.

AlanMeyer profile image
AlanMeyer

I have good friends that I made in the 26 years I worked at my last job. I still go in once a month to discuss books and to eat lunch with them, and to keep up with what's going on in the computer systems that I worked in.

Maybe something like that will appeal to you too.

Alan

ctarleton profile image
ctarleton

Congratulations, Yost. Enjoy all the new opportunities that will open up with all those previously constrained hours of your life now free for other things.

Charles

Chubby42 profile image
Chubby42

Congrats and good luck Yost enjoy.

Rogersw profile image
Rogersw

Good luck. You will soon be wondering how on earth you had the time to go to work.

erjlg3 profile image
erjlg3 in reply toRogersw

That is the Truth!!! 😁😁

vandy69 profile image
vandy69

Good Morning Yost,

I was "lucky" to be retired when I was diagnosed with Stage 4 PCa in 8/2012.

As we all know, fighting this disease is a full time job and requires research, phone calls, and action!

Now you will have the time to both enjoy life and to continue the battle.

Over the past 5+ years I have developed an new circle of friends at our local support group and with this fantastic sharing team.

Best wishes. Never Give In.

Break60 profile image
Break60

Good luck! If you don’t have one I suggest you get a gym membership and spend a lot of time there. It will greatly improve your mind and body .

WinnipesaukeeBob profile image
WinnipesaukeeBob

I loved work and the workplace and then got hammered by mCRPC. The year last year spent working while pretty sick was by far the toughest. Now I love retirement with its freedom and new friendships. The small and ordinary things in life are beautiful when you have time to experience them.

Congratulations on your retirement. You have been through the hardest time and your new adventure begins.

Bob

Enjoy your retirement. Seven years ago at 63, I did the same and have looked back nor did I regret my decision.

Gourd Dancer

truckerbob profile image
truckerbob

Yost, any chance you could let me know how the process of getting disability goes for you? I was diagnosed 20 months ago with aPc with mets in bladder and Gleason 10. Went thru 3 ADT drugs and kept building resistance. Now just Lupron and in December will be put on xtandi. I've kept working driving an 18 wheeler the whole time but it's getting too hard to keep working. I've got tumors in the bladder that give me problems peeing and I just had my 2d TURP operation 2 weeks ago. I've been driving 30 years and just discovered last month that I could have been on disability this whole time. I told my employer that I will retire in April. My 25th anniversary with current employer is in March and I would like to make that milestone for the pride of saying I retired as a 25 year man but I don't know if I will make it as body is slowly losing muscle. If oncologist at appointment next month advises retiring I will do it then instead of April. I would like to know about the experience of applying for and getting disability and Medicare. I haven't had time to visit a social security office yet. Last PSA 3.5 in September and I've become resistant to degarilix, casodex and zytiga. It's tough saying goodbye to a career I love and the only thing I've known for 30 years but I know it's time. This 58 year old batchelor trucker is going to enjoy retirement while I still can. Thanks for any advice guys. Truckerbob

YostConner profile image
YostConner in reply totruckerbob

Tuckerbob,

I’ll report how my experience goes. One of our brothers here reported a couple of weeks ago that he initiated his claim online and had a smooth experience. I will also initiate online.

I’m sorry your treatment is interfering with a career you obviously enjoy.

Yost.

in reply totruckerbob

Hey Bob ,I logged close to a million miles in my life. No wonder my back is jacked up. Not a healthy lifestyle. Driving was a major part or most of my jobs. Less driving is bnificial to our health. Being an out westerner it just seamed that driving long distances has been a way of life in my family. No5 so much now with hip and urological issues long distance not so much fun. You will make a great adjustment for health. Much luck!

charmander profile image
charmander

Yost you've made a hard decision and I honor you for that. Your decision is necessary and carries with it emotional and practical aspects. My glass is raised to you as you adjust your sails for a new breeze!! Well done brother

in reply tocharmander

Sail on!

jimreilly profile image
jimreilly

Wishng you well, Yost!

18 yrs. That’s a good run . They will be at a loss without you. More important is your daily existence. many men work until they drop in the trenches ..The American way. With your intellect I will bet that you’ll not get bored and stay busy and follow your desires ..Please keep helping us all with you informed views .Ive been in this status for 3 yrs.I was a type -A ,go,go,go, ..Enjoy every day Sir,and thanks fo the help

Yost, it is a transition and like Darryl mentioned there will be emotions and a some stress that go with it. You'll undoubtedly miss being a contributor and being with your buddies in the office. You'll probably even dream 'work' dreams. My diagnosis came after I was already retired after 29 years at a company that got progressively meaner and more stressful. I'm happy to be gone from there and still working to figure out retirement ... with the added challenge of dealing with health issues. All the best and I know we will all continue to enjoy your comments and support here.

More people like you then not. Most are even heavy in debt ..I ve lived off savings for over 5 yrs now. Down to a very small amount now. Burned thru a lot during the first 2yrs of treatment. One thing is for sure ,you will find out who is there for you .Most of us as adults are on our own financially. S.S. Disability will take your high yearly earning for the past 5 yrs to determine your payout amount ..On my case I didn’t earn much after the financial turn down so my payout is $1150 per month for my wife and I. Way below the poverty level. But grateful to have anything. It’ll keep the lights on if you’re careful. I’ve given up thoughts of ever receiving a paycheck again. By the way woke up to a caput refridge ..Going to Home Depot. That’ll be a grand. Maintanence and bill keep going ..No European vacations in the the foreseeable future. But I was fortunate to travel a little bit in a full healthy state. Good luck....we just have to keep grinding on in life and finding enjoyment in non monetary ways. No doe is a phycologically grueling , for me because I actually lived the High” life for most of my adult life ..Foolishly never bought life or health insurance so I have only myself to blame. I’m over that however. If I keep kickin my self for the mistakes I’ve made in the past I’d go jump off a cliff right now.. I m not really concerned about anything extravagant but nearly praying that I can keep food in the house and the lights on. We have a roof over our head. Millions in the world can’t say that. Your last line is the most important. You and I have love and we’re not alone. That’s everything!

I was scared and I almost highered a lawyer. Boy, glad I didn’t. Got fast tracked. APC can not be denied as a life altering condition. I feel that in the not to distant future that social security won’t be viable. Get on now I don’t think it will be there for future generations.

j-o-h-n profile image
j-o-h-n

Good Luck Yost....

When I retired my company gave me a watch, it was a royal "Gruen".

My wife said "that she married me for better or worse but not for lunch".

j-o-h-n Tuesday 11/7/2017 3:18 PM EST

jimbob99999 profile image
jimbob99999

Congrats on retirement. Gives you time to go at it full, time. I am in the same position. My employer knows, and is very supportive, but I am thinking I will call it a day in next month or so to enjoy the time I have and devote more time to fighting this. Just became a grandad so more to live on for!

YostConner profile image
YostConner in reply tojimbob99999

Congratulations, Grandad!

Nutters85 profile image
Nutters85

Onward and upward!! I too am going to work as long as possible. Hopefully your life will be a little less stressful. Enjoy!!

Don1157 profile image
Don1157

Good luck Yost, take advantage of more time for you and less stress! You are in my thoughts as in most of us on here. You have been helpful in your thoughts and clear minded guidance. Now you have more time to write on here!!

Hazard profile image
Hazard

`Yost I don't know how you have kept going for the last 10 years and you are a better man than me. But you have to look after #1and now I hope that you use your extra time well (and long) in the ongoing fight.

BEst wishes for your retirement.

paulofaus profile image
paulofaus

Best of luck. I hope you have a very long retirement!

ChuckBandChar profile image
ChuckBandChar

Congratulations on your retirement. My husband retired early as well and has had no regrets, especially as he’s continued to battle this disease. He’s had the time to go fishing and finding ways to enjoy his life.

cfrees1 profile image
cfrees1

Wow, there are a lot of comments on here and I will need to take time to read them all. I'm 52 and have been diagnosed with APC, but have no evidence of mets at the present time except for a rising PSA. I am confused at what point retirement makes sense? I would rather not wait until I can no longer work, but also don't know at what point I would actually qualify for disability? Are there specific diagnosis markers that are required? I had local lymph node mets at the time of diagnosis, and currently on Lupron and Casodex, PSA at 0.8.

YostConner profile image
YostConner in reply tocfrees1

I think I qualified some time ago, but for me when the disease and treatment were interfering with my work and when the brain fog resulted in errors in my work, I knew it was time. Best wishes to you!

Hankwhy91 profile image
Hankwhy91

Huge Congrats to you!!! Happy for you-this is wonderful news!!!

Apollo123 profile image
Apollo123

Congratulations, I was fortunate to be in the position to retire at 44 (sold my company) and whilst some people said it was too young I’ve loved every minute of it! In fact I say to my wife I don’t know how I fitted in work!! I walk every day take a coffee by the sea front and generally do what I please every day. I appreciate it even more since my diagnosis and love every moment. You deserve to love your retirement and saying goodbye to colleagues is hard but I’ve made sure to keep a strong social circle. Good luck with a relaxing wonderful phase in your life. I don’t do things that cost a fortune just simple things that make me appreciate life 👍

JimVanHorn profile image
JimVanHorn

I retired in 2000 and found out I have PCa in 2004, then metastasis in 2011. I moved from Ohio to central Florida in 2000 and I am enjoying what I can in Florida. There is so much to do and life has changed for me for the better. My parents have died now, but I keep in touch with my family. I had "working" dreams for about 2 years about stressful problems at work (I was a pharmacist at CVS). I would awaken and think I was back at work again and customers were angry at me. So live life to the fullest, you deserve it!

YostConner profile image
YostConner in reply toJimVanHorn

Thanks, Jim. One of my grandfathers was a small-town druggist, as pharmacists were called in his day. I’m glad you are enjoying your time.

leswell profile image
leswell

Dear Yost and husband, Les and I send you our congratulations and best wishes in retirement. May the application processes for future financing be less onerous than you anticipate. Beware, however, when applying for Medicare. When Les was a month away from 65, the lady with whom we had an appointment recommended retiring at age 62! She was quite insistent.

Yost, we read together out loud most of the posts to you at this momentous occasion until I choked up at the concern and helpfulness of everyone (as usual) in this community—to which I can add nothing except that we are sad for those who not only have the same diagnosis but in addition have suffered tremendous financial losses. We were blessed to have a generous teacher’s pension and twenty healthy, happy retirement years before the PCa diagnosis. I wish all of you could say the same.

One quick update: Les got his KS7 Rexton hearing aids yesterday at Costco. OUR MARRIAGE IS SAVED! Except now he says I can still speak more softly. I will try.

May your joy increase exponentially during a long future together.

Jan and Les

Heidabelle profile image
Heidabelle

Thank you for sharing your story. Sending lots of healing prayers.

RonL profile image
RonL

I had retired before I was diagnosed but my hat is off to you. I can’t imagine having to deal with PC while holding down a full time job. Take care.

Mrkharn profile image
Mrkharn

Enjoy your retirement.

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