Why ????

[Tormented555]

Why is there ADD ? Why do I have a brain like Swiss cheese ? Yesterday I made a cup of coffee and then it disappeared. After tearing the place apart, tearing my hair out, I realized that I put it in the microwave. Today the same thing happened, but it's not in the microwave. I still have no idea where it is. I'm not one of these people who can laugh at my ADD, even though it's so ridiculous it's laughable. I'm not one of these people who can " look on the bright side" or any of that crap. I'm basically screwed, doomed to a hellish recurring nightmare of a life. There is no hope. It'll end when I die. But why? It's a strange punishment. Almost like Midas, he's greedy so everything he touches turns to gold, but then he can't eat. Did I do something in a past life? It's like someone said to me, "You will look like anyone else, only your brain will be like Swiss cheese. You won't remember what you just did, and you won't be able to ever do anything about it, because you won't remember to follow through when you need to. So, you're screwed. You'll hate your situation, you'll hate yourself, you'll hate your life, and you won't be able to do anything about it." But why? I've given up on ever doing anything about it, now, I'm just curious why. Did I do something bad in a past life? Did I abuse someone and call them stupid, so now I'm doomed to do stupid things my entire life, without being able to stop? I've given up on any hope or solution - which is actually liberating - no more expectations and disappointments, just a realization of the true nature of my situation. Hopeless. Nothing to do except flounder through life the best I can. Uplifting, isn't it?

[STEM_Dad]

I hear you. Swiss cheese brain sounds as good of an analogy as any other.

I'd like to think that it's not due to karma as a result of how I lived in a past life. I think of myself as a good person, and if there is such a thing as reincarnation (which I don't personally ascribe to, but I know that lots of people in the world believe in it), then I'd also like to think that I am a good person in every life.

~~~

Many other people have other ailments or imperfections. Diabetes, hypertension, arthritis, celiac disease, peanut allergy...so many things that might make someone else feel the same way about their lot in life.

Hopefully, we don't all have these ailments because we were just jerks to in a past life. (I know that humanity doesn't have the best track record, though.)

~~~

But just to be in the safe side, I guess that being a good person in this life would be your insurance policy for the next one. 😉

[Tormented555 in reply to STEM_Dad]

Honestly, I'd take any of those other conditions over this one. At least people with those conditions are able to manage their conditions and live happy lives. With my condition it's like I'm programmed for failure

[STEM_Dad in reply to Tormented555]

That might be.

I can't argue against what your experience is.

~~~

However, I've known plenty of neurotypical people who have thought that they have it worse than me.

My ex-wife is neurotypical (or at least much closer to neurotypical than me)*. She has diabetes, chronic pain, and a few other chronic conditions. She doesn't seem very happy living with those conditions. *(She has had occasional mental health challenges, but I won't go into detail here.)

*I will admit that I'm better off than her physically. (She seems to be better off cognitively. Even though I got farther in school and career training, she's got much better executive functioning skills.)

[Mamamichl]

I like to call it autopilot. My partner likes to call it switching dimensions. It really is hard to keep everything in the right place. We try to minimize how much stuff we have. We also generally put it in logical places, and I’ve learned where those places are, and may have some photographic memory. I remember when I saw 5ings.

[Tormented555 in reply to Mamamichl]

What's 5ings ?

[Mamamichl in reply to Tormented555]

typo... 😂😅I get this one a lot when I type "things" on my iPad or phone

[Pestguy]

It's nothing to do with what you've done or said period. It's a chemical imbalance. It happens to a lot of people. I've had this since nineteen eighty. My parents thought I was just an active kid. But I was on rolling school could not pay attention. They sent me through a psychiatrist. And they diagnose me with 80 HD. When I was little, my parents put me on Ritalin. They did not like the way. It made me where I was slow, not as hyper so they took me off of it. And I was off of medication for years. I married the love of my life 23 years ago and through a relationship. I've had all kinds of issues with anger irritability, quickness 2 be. Mad, forgetting things constantly cannot stop thinking, constantly worrying over everything. Mind continuously running and finally I went to. A therapist and then a psychiatrist and got put on the right medication. So far, that has worked for me. I've tried other medications and smart liver went through those very quickly. It did not have any effect so far Strattera . This has helped me for the last year. There is hope and help. Just don't be afraid to seek it out and get the treatment you need

[Pestguy]

I used my microphone on my phone to type that message, I do apologize for all the Grammar and crazy run sentences

[Trailblazer20]

I believe mine gets worse when I eat poorly.

Diet:

This dude says sugar sucks, carbs kill, protein is power... omega is important for brain function and remember "Zim" + B6 so zinc, iron, magnesium + all the B complexes.

Exercise:

It stims the brain making you more Focus, calm, less irritated and vigorous

Rest:

No sugar or caffeine after 4.Eat protein snacks 2 hours before bed

No media less than an hour before bed

[Trailblazer20 in reply to Trailblazer20]

Go work at a state park or national park if you can....... Nature is so much better than the daily grind of the city. You'll be in a much more chill place with chill people. It will probably change your life!!!!!

[Jiraf]

Have you tried any medication? I have found Concerta to be hugely helpful.

I also second what others have said about the importance of some physical lifestyle choices. Here are tips I came across that were promosted as being helpful for ADHD, many of which I can vouch for.

1. Eat healthy (lots of fruits, veggies, grains, lean proteins) and limit sugars to help limit mood swings

2. Exercise consistently

a. Burns off excess energy

b. Reduces stress

c. Calms the body

3. Rest well.

4. Create a structured routine and practice time management.

a. Use a planner

b. Make lists

c. Keep notes

d. Set alerts and alarms

e. Avoid procrastination

5. Practice relaxation

a. Yoga

b. meditation

I also found the below from Dr. Hallowell, which I found hugely affirming:

It's not a deficit, it's an abundance

• Distractibility - turned on its head is curiosity

• Impulsivity - turned on its head is creativity

• Hyperactivity - turned on its head is energy

I hate to hear you are in such a dark place. Try to work towards acceptance and symptom management. Good luck!

[Tormented555 in reply to Jiraf]

Thank you !