Hi Everyone - just diagnosed at 50

[whycantidothis]

wow I cant believe I have finally found an answer to so many things I had no idea were related to adhd. my brother was diagnosed as a child but did not receive help or treatment. i was never diagnosed - always knew i had it but thought it just made me hyper and unable to concentrate. finally it all caught up with me - possibly menopause and divorce - and my lack of focus has made it so bad i am unable to earn a living for myself - i have been fired twice this year for making mistakes and not understanding instructions - despite trying so hard with everything i do. i am unable toget where i want to get. i always knew i thought differently to everyone else but now i know the reason! also i have told a couple of people close to me and one of them told me adhd is all in my mind. that made me feel sick because i have done so much research and can see that it is a biological difference in my brain that i have no way of controlling. i tried to explain but they had a big wall up. i read about masking -= and realised that is what i have always called 'pretending'. i always have to pretend when i am around other people. im too enthusiastic - too over the top- cant do small talk... i could write for ages but i know peeps here gonna get bored ahaha

[Celestialbird]

I just had my first appointment for ADHD testing and will go for my second one soon for the actual testing. I really hope this is an answer for me, as I’ve struggled so much in my life with school, and having a hard time understanding basic instructions or even understand social cues from others.

I’m glad you got answer for yourself. Also, f**k people who say it’s all in your head. I really hate that mentality. Just because it’s invisible to them doesn’t make it a real and debilitating issue to you. Those are the type of people who make it really hard for people with mental Illness or learning disabilities to get the help they really need and why it’s so looked down upon.

[whycantidothis in reply to Celestialbird]

Hey Scarlet - i hope you find your answer - let me know. yes social struggles are pretty huge for me... i am way to enthusiastic and out there - and then I am also quite antisocial sometimes and just like to be alone as i am not on the same wavelength at all as most people. finally having a diagnosis is a relief because i can finally understand why i am like that - i hope you will get that relief too. totolly - fk those people who have no idea about what it is but decide to diminish your life experiences anyway... 😡to be honest i am very accepting of others and that is because i was bullied and rejected in school and i know what it feels like for people who dont even know you to judge because you are different

[OrchidLove in reply to Celestialbird]

Couldn't agree with you more! YES to everything you've said and then some. I was diagnosed at 47 and it has been a process of rediscovery ever since. (I'm almost 51.). I went through a period of shame and remorse, but ultimately realized that many of the ways ADHD make me the person I am, and that "my squad" who has known me for decades knew something was different about me and loved me anyway. It also sheds light on things that are truly interesting to you and reveals things that have absolutely no interest to you - even if you didn't live with ADHD. It also reveals those who treat you poorly despite your willingness to be friendly and sensitive to their needs. From a work perspective, the voice inside of doubt can impede your progress, but can also confirm that the disorganization you may feel internally, is often a reflection of the disorganization of the environment around you. You just have the clarity to acknowledge it and not excuse it as "a fast-paced environment."

I'm so glad you "stopped" by and left your story. My hope for you today is that the loneliness and the isolation so many of us feel or have felt will be replaced with support and understanding.

[New-Diagnosis]

Hi and welcome! I'm also a late-in-life official member of the ADHD club. At 56 (really several years before), I could no longer cope by trying harder and harder and masking to try to live up to neurotypical standards. I'd hit repeated burn-out. Vyvanse has changed my life and career. I'm so much happier and calmer. Hope you find the same level of support, whatever you choose to do! Take care.