Take a Ticcer Out

[catherinem]

Here’s a quick guide for statues (people without TS) to help them when making decisions about evenings out with a ticcer. I should have done this earlier but like a lot of my good ideas I have them too late, like the sadly cancelled Christmas Dinner in Birmingham.

Choosing an activity

This is quite important; I have quite a short attention span so some activities may not be suitable for example:

• Going to the cinema, due to the obvious (the vocal tics) going to the cinema is a no-no despite being a film buff, no matter how interesting the film is it’s highly likely that I’ll get bored half-way through and lose the plot. Anyway the film will be out on DVD soon.

• Bird-spotting

• Poetry readings.

Some activities are very suitable but however can go very wrong if the wrong venue is chosen.

• Restaurants, I love food and a tipple or few, I also enjoy a good conversation that is why noisy, busy, crowded restaurants are a big no-no, due to filtering problems it can make having a conversation a complete impossibility and you just end up sitting there ticcing away whilst eating your food, drinking your wine and not hearing a word that your friend/partner/date has said thus making you feel like a complete idiot. On the other hand quiet restaurants have their own problems, particularly if you have vocal tics or any other tic that creates a sound (like my clapping tic or table-banging tic) you can stand out like a sore thumb and even the most out-and-proud of us ticcers would like to blend in to some extent. For me a romantic candle lit dinner could be disastrous due to my table-banging tic where I could quite easily knock the candle off the table and set fire to the table cloth. Oooppss. So, in essence when choosing a restaurant, not to quiet and not to busy is the rule of thumb.

• Pubs, the same applies to pubs as it does to restaurants, I’m there for the conversation, not to stand there staring at my feet because I can’t make out what’s being said. Not to noisy and not to quiet and steer well away from those you’re likely to offend (Daily Mail readers, and larger people without a sense of humour) although you’re probably not going to find them in the same pub. Please let me know if you spot a Daily Mail reader.

I would like to congratulate Claire from the TA office on her excellent ticcer-friendly choice for evening out last week. The show was a perfect night out for a ticcer (provided I could sit on the end just I case I got restless and needed to wander) lots of short items, a fairly noisy but the performers were clearly audible and kept the ticcer with a short attention span entertained whilst noisy enough to disguise her tics. Genius. The same could be said for the person who thought that going to see The Mighty Boosh would be a good idea (was it me or my brother? I can’t remember) I lively show, hecklers welcome (That was my partner shouting at Noel Fielding, not me) and any excuse to wear fancy dress. Who else would go across Sheffield on the tram dressed as a green man and a shaman (minus a magic carpet)?