The Mistress of Profanity

The Mistress of Profanity

Considering this is a website about Tourette’s syndrome, I haven’t really written much about my tics, maybe it’s because I’ve reached a certain stage where they don’t really bother me that much, and if anybody has a problem with my tics, well it’s not my fault they’ll just have to live with it because suppression is bad for one’s health. But I must confess my tics have been quite active over the last few days, I must have a tic for almost every body part, my left leg is feeling left out. My right leg however had a bit of an epiphany whilst walking home from seeing my GP earlier. I presented the poor man with a list of problems – firstly the need for a sick note in order to be signed off JSA and claim ESA, to discuss my recent mental health problems, the vennax prescription problem has now been sorted, to sort out my pill problem and take a look at my dodgy knee. Up until today it’s been a mystery to me why my right knee has been painful when walking up and down stairs, I was agony on Tuesday whilst in the V&A and now I know why, it’s the way I’ve been walking, I’ve been putting more weight on my right side and also a combination of over straightening my knee and twisting my knee around whilst walking. I’ve probably been doing this for a couple of years at least; when I saw my gynaecologist a couple of years ago I twisted my right leg around and kicked him whilst he was examining me. It gave the poor guy a bit of a shock.

My vocal tics have increased recently as well, as a result of all the shouting, squeaking and whistling I now sound a bit like follow Welsh woman Bonnie Tyler, but a filthy, potty-mouthed version. (Well I do come from Llanelli!) If you’ve forgotten the Welsh songstress and her big hair, here she is in all her croaky glory!

The range of vocabulary that the ticcy beast within is using is increasing, it is also insulting a greater range of victims, notably people with spectacles (like me!), most annoyingly the worst is the addition of a new word, a word described by the feminist Germaine Greer as “one of the few remaining words in the English language with a genuine power to shock” which it has done, it isn’t a word that I would use in conversation, in fact I find it a very misogynistic insult even though feminists are trying to reclaim the word. Infact not so long back there was a documentary on BBC4 (or 3) about this word and it’s history. The advantage of being so noisy is that it’s difficult to loose me in public places, although my boyfriend has tried, three times yesterday in Tescos! The disadvantage of being so noisy is that it takes longer than normal to ask strangers questions such as “Have you seen a guy with long dark hair wearing a Honda jacket?” That’s if they stay around to listen to you swear, clap and squeak.

Well tomorrow morning I’m off to be assessed to be allocated a CPN.

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  • Oh no! Not that word! I've got that as well and I do get the occasional odd look from people. I suppose that's the advantage of autism is I can't always tell what their facial expression is! Probably pure and total shock! Talking of losing people in public places, one time I was in Milton Keynes library (huge place) and my Mum just walked in and found me straight away. I wasn't even in the section I was normally in! I said 'how did you find me?' she said 'I followed the squeaking noises!'. I hope your assessment goes well :)

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