Having just returned from a holiday with a friend, it has made me think a lot about recovery… We were shocked at the lack of butter! I know, I know, most reading this will not believe me. Years ago I wouldn’t have either. I always thought stories of recovery were too good to be true and those involved were in severe denial (it turns out that was actually me at the time).
My friend I went with also hated flying, tricky when you know that you have to fly to get there. It was a journey she wouldn’t enjoy, to get to an ultimate goal of holiday fun.
When you think about it, recovery is thrown about by doctors and therapists like it is an amazing journey. The mode of transport you need to get to your ultimate destination of health and freedom.
A flight on the recovery plane is by no means business class; in fact it is the most extreme of budget airlines. This has to be a choice trip if you’re going for the long haul. I took a few short flights every so often, but probably never made it further than the borders of the UK!
Then one day you decide you’re going on that flight in search of freedom and to feel well, because things just can’t get any grimmer. Sound familiar?
When you decide to go for it, and fight it, you need to prepare for it. That’s the biggest thing. Just as all eating disorders experiences are individual, so are the recovery ones, but the tips and tricks can still apply.
Read books, and talk to your therapist. If you know in advance what will be happening, it will come as less of a shock.
Learn about how your body works, what it does with food, what it can do… And what it doesn’t want to do (eight years of the gym every day, and it turns out I actually hate it)
Learn about how your body will change in recovery – Weight gain can be a terrifying thing, but if you prepare for it, then you can manage the change
Have people you can talk openly to – Tell them exactly how you feel
Even if you only take one bite more than think you can, that in itself is a big achievement
Have activities you can do to distract you after eating to stop the guilt, or the need to purge.
Trust the people around you – They are there to make you well, and don’t have any other motives
Set yourself achievable goals, and reward yourself when you reach them
Sometimes you won’t reach your goals, or something will happen and throw you off track. That’s ok, just start again when you can.
The recovery journey is never going to be the most amazing or glamorous trip of your life, but it doesn’t have to be miserable. Just like any other aeroplane, you need the in flight entertainment. You can still have a sense of humour, and you can talk candidly about it. For every truly awful moment, I can think of many times my friends made me laugh about it!
And you know what? My friend was fine on the flight, because we laughed… A lot!
