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combination feeding every feed? ?

Cookies7 profile image
65 Replies

Hi everyone, I'm hoping someone can give me some tips on combinationfeeding. I have been combination feeding but only 2 bottles a day. I have been worried about baby weight gain and just had him weighed this week.hes only put on 500grams in the whole month. I think they are supposed to put on atleast 1 pound.

so I want to still carry on giving him breastmilk but feed him 2 /3 ounces formula first then give some breast milk. And do that every 3/4 hours Does that sound like something I should do or will my milk dry up as he might not be hungry enough? He is 4 months and is not putting on alot weight.but constantly feeds so I thought somethings not right. Turns out he's not putting on much weight. I've been trying to get appointment with doctors but just so busy I don't know who to get advice from. My hv doesn't seem to care that he's always feeding and yet only gaine d 500g. As a mother you can tell when somethings not right. But no one is listening to my concerns.

people are saying wait till he's 6 months but reality is even once he's started solids milk intake still needs to be very high.

Thanks to everyone that replied really helpe me

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65 Replies
Mcra profile image
Mcra

I'm not a doctor but 500g in a month seems perfectly normal, so you're doing great. Also 500 grams is more than a pound (a pound is around 450). How is the growth chart? How is latch? Your breastmilk is the best nutrition for your baby, so if you'd like to continue I'd focus on latch optimisation. Is there a feeding consultant you could see?

Cookies7 profile image
Cookies7 in reply toMcra

Ah yes I got that bit wrong. So he's gained a pound but he feeds alot. He has a shallow latch I think that's why I'm constantly having to feed him. There was a point he was putting a pound on in 10 days. Now his weight gain is much slower. For the past month and a half he has been refusing formula I think that was helping him gain weight

Cookies7 profile image
Cookies7 in reply toMcra

If you search online it says they should gain 140 to 200 grams a week. So my little guy is on the lower side even with all the feeding he does. Surely that's not normal. It makes Me think if I didn't feed him constantly he would gain even less weight.

Seb9 profile image
Seb9

I think you need to speak to your health visitor about your concerns or call the NCT feeding helpline for advice. All babies follow their own paths and if your baby is gaining and following their curve, then they're either gain seems fine. They do put on weight slower as they get older so it's not unusual for it to slow down.

It might help to speak to someone to try to address your anxiety around weight gain and try to understand what it is that is concerning you. If it's the constant feeding this is really normal, it's pretty much all they do at this age. Eat, sleep, poop, repeat.

If you do give more formula then this will in turn lower your supply of breastmilk. The more milk baby demands from you, the more you'll make. The less they demand from you, the less you'll make. It won't make much difference to baby where they get it from as they will still take just what they require.

The NCT helpline might be a good place to start to speak to someone initially

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Cookies7 profile image
Cookies7 in reply toSeb9

Thankyou I will give them a ring. I just don't get a break and with all that effort I put in I kind of expect him to gain weight faster. He initially gained weight well but recently started refusing the bottle and I think that's having an effect. He doesn't sleep or nap well because he's always hungry.

Seb9 profile image
Seb9 in reply toCookies7

Honestly what they're eating and drinking won't always affect how they sleep. My 1 year old eats more than her 3yr old sister and is still a terrible sleeper. Sometimes they're just not good sleepers despite eating and drinking tons. Weight gain does slow down as they get older, if baby is having lots of wet and dirty nappies and gaining on there percentile, it really sounds like you're doing a great job xx

Cookies7 profile image
Cookies7 in reply toSeb9

Hmm that makes sense. He's not pooping as much like he used to and I can't say the wet nappies are heavy much. Does gaining on percentile mean following the curve or going above. As he was 11pounds this month 12 pounds so he's not really shooting up percentiles. He's just on the same line when I've looked at the red book.

Sunnyday33 profile image
Sunnyday33 in reply toCookies7

Ideally he will follow the line rather than jump centiles

Pnw2020 profile image
Pnw2020 in reply toSunnyday33

Baby ideally needs to follow a centile so weight gain sounds good. Don’t forget babies are moving more now so using the energy! Definitely ask to be referred to feeding specialist for support to check latch etc and give support re: combi feeding.

There may also be a local drop in breastfeeding support clinic.

Cookies7 profile image
Cookies7 in reply toPnw2020

Thanks, I have been to my local breastfeeding class. She told me to hold him in the crosscradle position however when i do I can't hear him drinking. I use the football hold at home and hear him drinking. However the latch looks deeper with crosscradle hold if that make sense. So don't know what to do there.Also my breast never feel full. Even if he sleeps longer at night I never feel like oh these need emptying. I have never leaked milk into my bra either. And my breasts don't feel heavy much even when they are full. If you were to see me uou wouldn't think I am breastfeeding that's how small my breasts look.

Mcra profile image
Mcra in reply toCookies7

You don't need to hear baby swallow and breasts do not get empty, they produce milk all the time. When breasts feel engorged, that's when they get a signal baby's had enough and slow down the production. When they're soft it means your breastfeeding is well established and provide exactly what baby needs, so it's a good sign. And breast size has nothing to do with your milk production.

Cookies7 profile image
Cookies7 in reply toMcra

Right see I didn't know that when you google low milk supply it comes up with never leak, baby isn't content etc so that's why I'm doubting I am producing enough milk for him. Thanks for your advice though I think I need to stay away from Google.

😀

Seb9 profile image
Seb9 in reply toCookies7

Yes I mean he'll follow his percentile not go up. Both my girls have been small, but I'm only small and they've always stayed small, one stayed on 9th percentile and one 2nd percentile they've never gone up regardless of how much they ate.

Boobs adjust to feeling after a while so they stop getting engorged, they know how much baby feeds and don't overfill, you'd probably notice them full if you went out and missed a few feeds but other than that they will tend to feel soft and be back to normal size for you. It's really what you're aiming for as being engorged is uncomfortable and you risk mastitis if you've got milk there not being drunk. I think I heard it best described as being like a river not a lake, you're body now knows how much to make and so the river flows faster for a feed, but there's always milk there so even if baby wants more the river still flows just a little slower.

With leaking everyone is different, I've never leaked milk, people told me I'd go through millions of breastpads and I didn't even use a full pack. My friend who had her baby 5 days after me, still leaks and our babies are a year old now, so it's really not a good indicator of how much you're producing.

Breastfeeding, I would go for whichever latch is deeper and more comfortable for you and baby xx

Cookies7 profile image
Cookies7 in reply toSeb9

Right so as long as he's nor falling below the line everything ok.

I think I need to stay away from doctor google it's confusing me and making me anxious.

Thankyou so much for your advice, I feel better already.

Seb9 profile image
Seb9 in reply toCookies7

Definitely steer from Dr Google 😉 I've learned only to take very minimal advice from online. I read everything I could about getting my 1st girl to sleep and nothing worked, some kids just aren't good sleepers. I wasn't good either according to my mum, so my sleep thiefs are payback!

My second baby I got weighed probably 3 times after we were signed off by the midwife. Weigh in clashed with baby sensory class and they had scales there which I used once. She's now a year old today, has just had 2 pancakes and berries for breakfast and might walk any minute! She's still tiny compared to some of her friends, but she's thriving, hit all her 1 year review development questions and is fitting into clothes that are the right size for her age, so I tend to go on that rather than her actual weight.

Do you go to any baby sensory classes or just baby groups? It can be really helpful to see just how different each baby is. With my first I had a friend whose baby walked at 9 months and my daughter didn't walk till after her 1st birthday, yet my daughter potty trained at 2 and my friend is only just getting her child into pants at 3. They are just all so different.

I've also just done a course with Outlook South West, which is our local mental health provider, I did a finding myself course online which I've found really helpful but they also offered CBT training which I didn't feel I needed but some of the mum's in our group had found it really helpful. It might be worth getting in touch about your anxiety. It's really helped me to spot some of my unhelpful thoughts and behaviours.

Cookies7 profile image
Cookies7 in reply toSeb9

The thing is I don't feel confident taking him places because hes so fussy if he hasn't drank formula. And his breastfeeding sessions are long but asleep. So I don't know what to do. I don't know if I am supposed to take him off when he falls asleep. I know feeding to sleep isn't a bad thing but I think it's the reason he's not drinking much and he can't nap. As soon as he drops of the breast I put him down and he's awake 5.mins later and crying hysterically. So I can't work out is he still hungry or is he annoyed I put him down. He seems to get his naps in while 'breastfeeding' I think because he's always sleep and sucking.

Seb9 profile image
Seb9 in reply toCookies7

Do you ever try to take him for a walk in a carrier, pram or in the car? My girls always contact napped at home but the movement of the pram etc sent them to sleep too. It can be really overwhelming to go out, especially if you think they're going to be fussy, but I would really recommend it, even if it's just going for a walk with a friend.Baby sensory is a really great environment and everyone there is going through similar to what you're going through, some weeks your baby might be the fussy one and some weeks they'll be a star and someone else will have the crying baby. So it's very supportive and your might even make friends there in the break. I'd definitely recommend it or something similar, I think if you had some people to chat to with babies of a similar age, you'd see that you're really doing fine and that it's just really hard xx

Cookies7 profile image
Cookies7 in reply toSeb9

I have taken him in the pushchair round the block but can only do that maybe once a day. The rest of the naps are either on the breast or lying on me.

I might give it a go one day my hv did give me a leaflet with info I'll have to look for it. As I'm a first time I'm still learning what baby wants or why baby I crying. But like you said meeting people with kids similar age could be really good for us both.

I really want to set up a routine with him but don't know how. I seem to be running around at 11pm doing dishes etc. I feel like feeding on demand is very time consuming especially when baby keeps falling asleep. I sometimes have to catch up on sleep in the morning. So I have no set time of starting the day. I think that's what's throwing the whole day into a hectic mess. Have you any tips on what to do when baby keeps falling asleep on the breast? I really want to break the breast sleeping and contact naps qs I really can't get anything else done. I'm a hands on always, then during his wake time I spend proper time with him. So I dint get a break or a chance to do housework. I really need him to sleep independently. But tummy has to be full atleast.

Seb9 profile image
Seb9 in reply toCookies7

I never really had a set routine and always did contact naps, my only advice is to make sure before you start is to have biscuits a drink and the TV remote to hand.Although it feels like forever now they're not this tiny for long and those snuggles should be enjoyed and you should take the time to relax and recharge because it is a really hard job being a mum.

Part of what helped me with a sort of routine was getting out and about. I would schedule things to go to in the mornings to get me up and out of the house, I'd feed wherever we were and put baby baby in the pram or car seat once they were fed. Getting baby out in the daylight can really help with sleep too as their circadian rhythm develops, being indoors is a bit like being in a casino in Vegas or in IKEA, you never know what part of the day, so they don't differentiate between day and night.

Is your partner or family available to do the washing up or a bit of housework? Maybe you could ask them to do a bit more around the house to help out and to look after baby while you practise some self care, like a bath or catch up with a friend for a coffee or glass of wine. I'm a big believer that you need to take care of yourself as well, as you can't keep giving out care, if you're not putting any into yourself.

Cookies7 profile image
Cookies7 in reply toSeb9

That makes a lot of sense. Even though it's going to get colder I will try and take him out daily. For contact naps would you do them for 1 hour at a time? And how many should a month old have do you know?

No I have no family here nor does my partner its just us. He works full-time and trys to help me once he gets back from work. I stick tea on while he looks after baby as most likely I haven't been able to cook while I am alone.with baby. On the weekend I'm still catching up with housework.

But I think I need to dish all that extra.work to my partner. The reality is its easier going out for a job you have especially when you get paid. For it. And get breaks. We mums don't get paid nor do we get breaks much 😀 having said that becoming a mother has been the best thing that has ever happened to me.

Seb9 profile image
Seb9 in reply toCookies7

I never timed or counted naps. I started doing it with my first, but it just made me more stressed. I just sort of followed their lead. If they were crying I changed their nappy then offered boob, then just let baby sleep how ever much they wanted. If I needed to do anything I would get up after a bit (maybe 2 to 3 episodes of the Big Bang Theory) and try and put baby in the pram sleeping, sometimes it would work, but other times they'd wake up, mostly I just sat and snuggled them till they woke up. They're 1 and 3 now and I'm back at work, so not so much time for snuggles like that.

With my second, my husband used to sit up with her while I went to bed and he would do the last feed with a bottle, so I'd get a good hour or two in bed before he would bring her up and put her in her next to me crib, it meant I could then face the night feeds much better.

It's really a case of finding what works for your. When I went back to work my mum had baby and she found pushing her back and forth in her pram playing music to her got her to sleep, so you do end up finding things that work for you. It's never perfect though, my 3 year old woke us all up at 4am this morning and wouldn't go back to sleep which is why I responded to yuo in the middle of the night and why today will be fueled by coffee 😉

Cookies7 profile image
Cookies7 in reply toSeb9

Awh. Good luck to you for today then 😀 Thanks for the advice, sorry I've been going on a bit. Did your babies sleep alone at 6 months? I'm hoping I can get him to have a few naps in his cot alone after 6 months. Will be a struggle I know. But my mum tells us stories of how she would give us food some milk and leave us to nap in our cots while we were little. She says she's had the easiest going kids

😀I want to be able to do normal things around the house while he's sleeping in the bedroom. Currently his moses basket is downstairs with me during the day but he never sleeps in it.

I'm moving him to cot in a week or so hopefully he sleeps ok in there at night. Also how does your partner cope with baby waking at night. Mine can sleep through 🙄

I've heard some women sleep in separate rooms as partners need to be up for work and baby waking disturbs them.

Seb9 profile image
Seb9 in reply toCookies7

I definitely didn't have the same kits as your mum lol.

Mostly they'd also in their buggy as they got older, downstairs but in the kitchen so I could still get stuff done, then I had two of them and went back to nothing getting done for a bit.

My husband could sleep through, sometimes I let him and sometimes I'd wake him up to take over for bit. With my first, he'd bring her to bed, I would do all the night feeds and then hand over to him on the morning, he'd take her out for a walk with the dog before he got ready for work and I'd sleep or have a shower and have some breakfast.

Cookies7 profile image
Cookies7 in reply toSeb9

I don't know why but it seems our mums were so good at raising us. They did it by themselves.

I know I seriously need a village to help me with one. I think I'm going to have my one sitting in the kitchen with me soon.

I'm really not sure I can carry on breastfeeding him. I feel exhausted 24/7 but the guilt of it is stopping me from moving entirely to formula. And with constant feelings only 500g weight gain its starting to all feel abit pointless.

Seb9 profile image
Seb9 in reply toCookies7

I enjoy breastfeeding, but we combi fed with baby number 2 especially now that I'm at work. I mainly do the overnight feeds and evening feed, the rest she's now just on cows milk now she's 1. I'll probably keep going with breastfeeding but only because I really don't mind it I'm lazy and cheap so having boob on tap works for me. When my baby was little I couldn't even remember to put my shoes on and take off my slippers to leave the house, so packing bottles as well seemed a challenge too far for me. Your baby seems to be putting on weight just fine, but if it's causing you extra anxiety by not knowing how much he's taking on, formula seems like a good plan. If something makes you a happier parent, then guilt can do one! You're doing what's right for you and baby. Breastfeeding does have lots of plus points, but if it's not right for you, baby will still thrive on formula. X

Cookies7 profile image
Cookies7 in reply toSeb9

I'm in 2 minds about it because I know how good breastmilk is.I'm thinking to maybe breastfeed at night and pump during the day so supply doesn't get affected and give him more formula.

Baby is12pounds and he's 4 months. All the clothes he has are still loose on him. That with long drawn out bf sessions I'm thinking somethings not right. He does have a very shallow latch. And I might ne looking to have that accessed before I make my final decision.

Thanks alot for chatting with me its really been helpful. Hope you day went well as you didn't get much sleep

Positivechangeplease profile image
Positivechangeplease in reply toCookies7

When I introduced a night formula feed for my baby, she started to sleep much better as she was fully fed. In 4 hour stints. Overall she became a much happier baby. And she’s 3 months now and I still offer my breast at night and I don’t mind if she doesn’t spend long on there, she gets some and that’s all that matters to me. I’m letting her lead me. If she decides she’s had enough (as it’s harder work) then I’ll stop. But it’s good in night as it makes her sleepy to start with.

Cookies7 profile image
Cookies7 in reply toPositivechangeplease

I would like to be in that position. When baby drinks formula during the day I can get a decent nap out of him. Otherwise he will wake up after 20 mins of coming of the breast. How are you feeding your little one during the day?

Positivechangeplease profile image
Positivechangeplease in reply toCookies7

She’s 12 weeks now and because she only spends a short time on my breast before getting tired in the night, we always top up with the bottle. She’s due to have 5 bottles of 180ml and because she gets only a little from me we don’t really count it but don’t think she overeats as night bottles are often left nearly full or half full. So she gets offered a bottle (and takes a little bit every time at least) each time she wakes for a feed. During the day her naps are less consistent and she takes very long to feed so we still feed on demand. And in the day it’s purely bottles, and my breasts have gotten used to not expressing or feeding during the day. We’ve worked out she’s not really getting more than 180ml at all so feeding on demand is still working for her. She’s a happy baby and I’m no longer upset and exhausted so happy mum and happy baby and Daddy gets to do a lot more for her. I fear my breasts are now drying up somewhat but she’s got to a good place so it is what it is and she’s leading it by spending less time on them. I always pump however at 10pm and usually get a couple of ounces that we feed before bed the next night - it gets her nice and sleepy and in the mood.

Countrychic profile image
Countrychic

I had similar issues with my first little boy but resolved by the time he was about two months. He had a tongue tie so struggled to latch on well. Once this was sorted (when he was days old), it took him about 7 weeks to feed well.

I had access to the infant feeding team who gave me support in terms of putting a feeding plan in place.

Firstly, I would suggest trusting the health professionals. If baby is consistently putting on weight then that is positive. Is baby tracking on centile charts? I think they only worry if baby drops down two lines on the chart. Then they should refer to paediatrics. We were referred but not seen, we were just given advice re: feeding and they agreed the plan. Just to be transparent, I was really anxious too and annoyed that nobody was worried about my baby’s weight gain. My best friend had the same experience. Both our boys are now happy, health toddlers. I also weaned our little one at 5 months instead of 6 because he was ready and then he stopped drinking much milk by around 6/7 months. Again, I majorly stressed about this but he is absolutely fine!

I was told to breastfeed on demand first and then top up with formula or expressed milk. I think I used to give my little boy 30mls after every breastfeeding session for a couple of weeks then gradually reduced to see if he was gaining weight in breast milk alone. Obviously he was younger so you might want to give a wee bit more?

I think the key thing in terms of your supply is keep feeding from breast first and night feds. I had to express for a couple of weeks overnight which really helped boost my supply. Apparently, baby should feed overnight and this stimulates your supply. Again, your wee one might be sleeping all night and you might prefer to express. I wouldn’t be keen to wake my baby if he mastered sleeping all night but it would be worth setting an alarm and expressing. I can’t remember timings but sure it is advised to feed or express before 5am.

Hope this is helpful. I also a breastfeeding specialist on FB really helpful. I can’t find the page right now and need to get my wee one up because he is shouting. I will share if I find it later.

Cookies7 profile image
Cookies7 in reply toCountrychic

Thankyou alot of useful info there for me. He has a upper lip tie but that alot of people have it shouldn't effect feeding so my hv said. The feedings are just constant and he doesn't stay awake much at the breast. Falls asleep straight away. You're right I'm so anxious as I feel like he's not gaining weight fast enough for how much he feeds.

He still wakes at night so yes I am feeding at night still. Will start expressing if he does start sleeping more. But he will wake qlot at night if I haven't got any formula down him. So it can be really exhausting when he wake every hour or so, even at 4 months. He's staying on the same centile yes.

I think my.anxiety is due to him being born quiet small as I had gestational diabetes. And I am putting in so much effort to make up for his low weight.

The most important thing is for the baby to get enough no matter where it comes from. I found that my baby was really hungry and wasn’t getting enough. My supply was low and then whilst we started combo feeding I got very poorly and dehydrated. Including my breasts. By the time I was better she was fully fledged on formula (although she’s always been getting some breast milk) she won’t feed for long on me so then I ended up with engorged breasts (not fun) as I decided to down my supply. In the end it will drop if the baby chooses not to spend so long on the boobs but the most important thing is that they are getting enough. It’s alright if you need to formula feed. Don’t be suppressed by the almighty “know it alls” who shove breastfeeding down your throat. It’s what is best for baby, and what is best for you that is important.

Cookies7 profile image
Cookies7 in reply toPositivechangeplease

I feel like he's always hungry too. He won't nap unless I get formula down him.

I might start just adding another bottle in the day to start with. If I'm honest I'm over breastfeeding but I feel really guilty at the sametime. Don't know what to do. I will definitely get a break if iformula feed thats for sure. But I can't get past the guilt. I still want him to have some breast and more formula.

Are you now fully on formula or do bf at night?

Positivechangeplease profile image
Positivechangeplease in reply toCookies7

I refused to feel guilty, babies are fine on formula and I figured I’ve given mine a good start. My mum was a breastfeeding counsellor back in the day and said I’d had so many problems formula was probably best and not to feel guilty. All my friends were combo feeding and we also went to see a lactation consultants who said she thought my supply was low and I could try and get it up by offering a bottle and pumping but she was dubious, partly because she said she’d seen women with flowing milk and those without and it was just one of those things and also it’s less work for baby and baby might just prefer a bottle in the end. The result I think is that she likes the breast for a bit but it’s real hard work and finishes after a short while. She’s then sleepy - we change her happy and she wakes up and is mega hungry… enter the formula. I don’t feel it’s fair to keep offering the breast when she’s having to work so hard. I also intended not to breast feed for too long. This is a shorter time than I intended but it’s very freeing and much better for my mental health than I anticipated. Please don’t beat yourself up about it. Yes Brest is best but only when it works for both mother and baby and formula is a very close second.

Cookies7 profile image
Cookies7 in reply toPositivechangeplease

That's exactly what my little one does he falls asleep on yhe breast and when I put him down its like he's realised I've not had anything. So where you give formula at that stage I just breastfeed again and it's thar never ending cycle.

It is very hard, like you said it helped you nebtalky to put baby on formula. I might have to consider that too as I need to do this for myself too not just baby.

Positivechangeplease profile image
Positivechangeplease in reply toCookies7

Yes please don’t feel guilty. We’re so far into a formula feed now, it’s our routine and she is much more satisfied on it. Do go and see a lactation consultant if you need to. I went to an independent one so there was no bias. Unfortunately there’s a lot of misinformation through breastfeeding bias. There should be no judgement if you want to formula feed and especially if you combo feed. Since I switched I’ve had a HV try and convince me to up the breastfeeding which my partner and I just ignored. But most everyone else incl GPs when I said I’m barely breast feeding, just a bit said, that’s fine. Some said well she’s getting a bit that counts and the older she gets the less important it becomes. X

Cookies7 profile image
Cookies7 in reply toPositivechangeplease

Yes my hv tried to do the same. She first told me to try get rid of one bottle at a time. I found that really hard as it was the only way I got a break.

The reality is I don't know anyone in my family who has breastfed. I've seen everyone make formulas. That's probly why I didn't realise how hard it is as there was no one with experience.

Positivechangeplease profile image
Positivechangeplease in reply toCookies7

🙄 it really irritates me. My sister is a consultant in a hospital but she also said she’s sure they’re made to say stuff like this. Because the midwives said it was dangerous to try a bottle early (this was when I was trying to pump) and my sister said she thinks they make it up. The fact that no one totally breast fed in your family shows that formula is okay. And as I said before about my mum… she must have thought it was too hard as she breast fed us all solely. I can wax lyrical all day about how shouting about how good breastfeeding is to mothers who are struggling can actually be mentally damaging. So you do you xxx

Cookies7 profile image
Cookies7 in reply toPositivechangeplease

That's so true. First week my hv telling me that I should try getting rid of the bottles by the next time she visits. That was in 10 days. I'm like what! Then after few more visits turns out she's moving areas and then says it's ok to formula feed bf has to work for both of you.

I'm abit confused at that point as she kept insisting on bf. However I still carried on combinationfeeding. Until now I have very less energy to do it as baby isn't putting weight on as dramatically as his constant feeds are.

Positivechangeplease profile image
Positivechangeplease in reply toCookies7

Yes that’s why I moved to night feeding and I enjoy it much more. Expressing before bed keeps the supply at about 60ml as long as she feeds in the night and gives her a mini snack feed before bed. Seems to work for me until she decides she doesn’t want it. Sounds like she was giving confusing advice. I was told not to bottle feed until 6 weeks in case they forget how to breast feed but eventually the midwife said it was okay to do what I wanted and she seemed well established at 3 weeks and they weren’t going to tell me I couldn’t do anything. Hope it works for you and let me know how it goes x

Cookies7 profile image
Cookies7 in reply toPositivechangeplease

I think I'll be doing the same feeding him bm just at night. How old is your little one now.

I just went to gp for myself but asked them about babies weight and she just told me hv is the person I need to speak to 🙄 so absolutely no help from doctors.

Does you baby drink formula rest of the day or do you give some breastmilk?

Positivechangeplease profile image
Positivechangeplease in reply toCookies7

She’s 12 weeks. And I must have been night feeding for at least 4 weeks and the flow has been pretty consistent. Oh yeah apparently the HV have the correct weighing scales. You should be able to get an idea if you weigh yourself though and add her but be aware it won’t be as accurate. You can plot her percentile on the red book.

Yeah she drinks formula for the whole day. The last two days she hasn’t been hungry or at least wanted the breast in the morning so I haven’t done that one and gone straight to formula. I had such a problem with painful feeding and then breast engorgement for trying to up supply, that I had to stop during the day hardcore to get my breasts to down supply- by then she didn’t want to spend long and I’d made the decision to formula feed in the day for ease. Definitely a good decision for me.

Cookies7 profile image
Cookies7 in reply toPositivechangeplease

That's sounds like a plan for me. But withe baby is always on the breast and never seems satisfied. I might go to local children's centre they have scales for baby weighing.

I think I'll just start introducing formula slowly.

Thanks alot for the chat really helped me feel less anxious about it all.

Cookies7 profile image
Cookies7 in reply toPositivechangeplease

Can I ask do you have set bedtime for baby?

Google is really confusing makes you thing you're doing things wrong. Currently baby has last nap till about 8 and then 10/11pm down for the night. Is that too late?

Positivechangeplease profile image
Positivechangeplease in reply toCookies7

We are now trying to sort her into a proper routine and had an awful day 😂 but for a few weeks now we’ve had a successful bedtime routine. We eat while she watches in the bouncer and we aim for bath time at 7.30pm - we then do milk and bed

But it’s what you want to make it as long as she’s getting enough sleep and you’d know that

LB1234 profile image
LB1234

Looks like you've already been given some good advice above - I'd definitely push to get more breastfeeding support. Can you go back to your local breastfeeding group and explain you are still worried? It would be worth going regularly if you can so you've got that continued support. Or do the same via your health visitor? You are right that adding in more formula will likely cause your supply to decrease. You need to do what's right for you but I'd definitely suggest seeking more support before making any changes. The NCT bf helpline that someone suggested is a good shout, there is also La Leche League.

It sounds like your wee one is thriving if he is following his line on the chart. The frequent wake ups are perfectly normal (my boy is also 4 months and can wake anything from 3 times in the night to every hour or more). They do tend to poo less as they get a bit bigger and it can be normal for EBF babies to only go every 5-7 days.

Also he may just want comfort from you so not actively feeding all the time is he latched on can also be normal, although I appreciate that doesn't help with your weight concerns (or tiredness!).

Cookies7 profile image
Cookies7 in reply toLB1234

Thankyou. The lady at the class told me to give him2 ounces of formula every now and then if I'm not catching a break from his feeding.

I will definitely be calling nct helpline as I've tried national breastfeeding helpline and they seem to always be busy so can't get through.

Right I thought they should be pooing every day and if not its a problem. So I guess that I was worrying about for no reason.

Yes I am not able to differentiate unfortunately between actual feeding and him latched on for comfort. Although whenever he cries too much I straight put him onto the breast as I think he's hungry.

JoyfulStar profile image
JoyfulStar

I had some issues with breastfeeding at the beginning with my daughter and found the NCT breastfeeding line very helpful so call them when you can.

I am in agreement with the others, one stops feeling engorged after a while as your body regulates the amount based on the demand. However if you are worried about supply, could you introduce a couple of pumping sessions to boost it? I would advise on caution though as oversupply can lead to blocked ducts and mastitis. I know from experience.

Also, if you choose to pump, perhaps feeding him breast milk from the bottle will reassure you that he is getting enough. This is much harder work than just feeding ( I did this for a while when my daughter was not gaining weight). It sounds like your son is gaining weight though.

My daughter also used to fall asleep very quickly whilst breastfeeding and I had to do lots to wake her up to feed. We also introduced the bottle to make sure she was getting enough.

I think it is natural to worry about our little ones but it really does sound like your little man is doing okay. Anything extra you do will hopefully give you peace of mind. It is mentally tough though and I hope it resolves itself soon. Finally, I would prioritise a deeper latch over hearing him drink. There are other ways to know he is drinking such as full cheeks and wet/ dirty nappies.

Cookies7 profile image
Cookies7 in reply toJoyfulStar

Thankyou for tips. Did you introduce formula via bottle or pumped milk.

I have thought about pimping but I get put of by the extra work its going to take. I'm thinking to buy the haaakka but don't know if that's going to work for me.

Ok i think I'll start using the crosscradle position. Plus that is easier as I don't need pillows for that. Definitely deeper latch that way.

JoyfulStar profile image
JoyfulStar in reply toCookies7

You are very welcome, She had both formula and expressed breast milk for a while via a bottle. This was only when she was not gaining weight though and we carried on for a while after that until I developed mastitis.

Pumping is extra work but it was good to know exactly how much she was getting so I stopped worrying about whether she was getting enough milk as sometimes she could polish off up to 120 mls in a single feed and she was only a few weeks old. It also reassured me that I had better supply than I initially thought. She also stayed awake while bottle feeding so that was also reassuring. I would only do it if absolutely necessary though as I stopped when she was about 8 weeks old.

I pump occasionally now but I can see that my baby girl is now rejecting the bottle! 😞She will be going to nursery soon so worried about that now…

Hope you get a breakthrough…

Cookies7 profile image
Cookies7 in reply toJoyfulStar

Thankyou I hope so too. Good luck to you in getting her on bottle if you need her to.

JoyfulStar profile image
JoyfulStar in reply toCookies7

Thank you! She accepted it eventually when she got really hungry. I will try again tomorrow so that she gets used to it.

JoyfulStar profile image
JoyfulStar in reply toJoyfulStar

I forgot to mention that I have a hawks and it does not pump just catches the overflow. This can be good for catching milk that is usually wasted.

Cookies7 profile image
Cookies7 in reply toJoyfulStar

Is that similar to the haakaa. I will have a look online. If it fits in your bra it's really good right.

JoyfulStar profile image
JoyfulStar in reply toCookies7

Sorry, I meant to say haakaa (stupid autocorrect! 😡)

Cookies7 profile image
Cookies7 in reply toJoyfulStar

Haha that's OK. I bought that too but haven't used it yet

Sorry if this has been covered I’m just adding a bit of advice from my own experience . Can you afford to get someone to come to you who is a registered tongue tie practitioner ? It’s around £100 I think . If you look up the Association of Tongue Tied Practitioner website, midwives , lactation consultants and oral surgeons are listed. They can come to you and consult on the tie. It’s very very likely that it is affecting feeding, regardless of what HV or regular midwives say, there are related issue like mouth breathing or snoring that come with ties that affect sleep , neck tightness etc. e.g. my girl couldn’t tip her head back properly it’s all related to the tie. If baby isn’t latching properly on you they might not be getting fatty milk at end of feed on breast feed . Good luck with combination feeding it’s a great option for lots of us x

Cookies7 profile image
Cookies7 in reply to

I didn't think to do that but I might have to give it a try. Hv looked at it and said it's all good. But like you said could help seeing a proper professional who deals with this stuff. He does breath with his mouth slightly open actually.

But thanks for the tips I'll definitely look into this.

in reply toCookies7

Yeah regular visual assessment by HV and midwives isn’t enough they need to use fingers in the mouth to assess fully. It’s a bit of a controversial among professional whether it affects feeding but the evidence is pretty strong . My baby put on weight okay so they didn’t care that my baby had terrible reflux but she was feeding basically every hour and it was exhausting. And she wasn’t happy … so I knew something wasn’t right . Good luck !! X

Cookies7 profile image
Cookies7 in reply to

Did your daughter have upper or lower lip tie?

Not a lip tie, a tongue tie , but the postier tongue ties can’t always been seen by just looking x

Cookies7 profile image
Cookies7 in reply to

Sure. Did you end up having the tongue tie cut. Was baby upset, in pain etc after this.

I've told them the same thing baby feeds every hour abd they just tell me that's normal. It will get better but thing is it never has.

Yeah we had it cut , she cried and then fed and went on as normal. but I was well used to her crying from discomfort with reflux , it was definitely an improvement after the cut and then even more improvement when we saw an Osteo from about 5/6 months for tongue tie related neck and shoulder tension x

Cookies7 profile image
Cookies7 in reply to

Thats really good to hear. I've been abit busy will be looking for a professional for my son too

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