Trying to get pregnant

[shigh]

Me and my boyfriend had sex on friday/saturday and sunday after having a conversation about starting to try for a baby. Friday was 14 days after the start of my last period so when i am mose fertile? What are my chances that im pregnant? He has came in me before and i havent been pregnant but that was over 5 months ago

[Hidden]

The chances are quite low - if you time it right and there are no issues then you have a 1 in 3 chance. Hopefully you are both eating a healthy diet and not drinking or smoking?

The first thing you need to do is work out when you are ovulating as everyone is different. Are your periods regular, when do you experience your ewcm (egg white cervical mucus)? It can become quite stressful.

The best thing to do is to have sex every other day throughout the month, enjoy it and each other, and hopefully you will become pregnant within a few months.

Good luck, oh and best to buy some strip tests from Amazon- much cheaper than the supermarket xx

[shigh in reply to Hidden]

Thankyou for your reply😁 me and my partner do not drink or smoke and both eat quite healthy. I will be sure to by some strips! X

[LuizaAK]

Getting pregnant is unfortunately not that easy as everybody think. Some people are just lucky and some struggle even if everything is good healthwise. I was told to try every day in fertile days and every other day for the rest of the month. It can be quite frustrating and tireing so remember to have fun!

Good luck xxx

[shigh in reply to LuizaAK]

Thankyou! Im just a very inpatient person unfortunately aha xx

[pinkie93]

It depends on you, Me and my partner are one of those couples who struggle not to get pregnant but for a lot of couples the opposite is true. If you're both healthy and under 30 then there's a reasonable chance. Although it also depends on your cycle, if you have a very short cycle, then you might have ovulated before having unprotected sex. I recommend using a period tracker and having lots of unprotected sex during the 2 weeks after your period finishes, sperm can survive for quite a long time in the womb if you don't ovulate until later than 2 weeks.

[shigh in reply to pinkie93]

Thankyou for your reply😊 me and my partner are both 18 so we are still quite young so i was wondering does this increase our changes or not?

[pinkie93 in reply to shigh]

Yes, but why on earth are you trying for a baby at 18? Once you have a baby your chances of ever getting on the property ladder will be significantly limited as you lose borrowing power. Also if you want to work or study then child care is very expensive and if you expect to just rely of family then that is very selfish. I know teen pregnancies happen and you love your boyfriend but you have your whole life ahead of you, why now? I'm 25, me and my husband have bought a property with a big nursery, I don't need to work yet still it won't be easy. Please make sure you have properly thought this through, when I was 18 I was desperate for a baby, but if I had a baby then I would have missed out on so much. Plus you may feel grown up at 18 but I've grown 2 inches in height and changed a lot since 18, being legally an adult doesn't make you a full adult. I know people will hate me for this comment, but please think about what you're doing, the strain this will put on your family, relationship and finances.

[Hidden in reply to pinkie93]

It's really up to each and every individual about when they have a baby. It's not fair to tell someone when they should or should not try. We don't know the circumstances of everyone and why should having a property be the be all and end all of goals in life? I really wish I had tried earlier - but that is me and my circumstances.

[pinkie93 in reply to Hidden]

Fair enough, I just want to make sure they have properly thought about this and renting your whole life can be a nightmare, especially when you get close to retirement (I know lots of people working well into retirement to keep their homes). I know everyone's different, but at 18 I was not the best at thinking things through and making decisions and would waiting until your at least 20 and feel more sure of yourself really make much of a difference to fertility? Having a baby is not all sunshine and light, I've seen plenty of people have children too young and struggle really badly with everything. Just think about it properly, it's a huge decision.

[Lilmossy in reply to pinkie93]

I don’t think you can think properly into having a baby, I was 19 when I found out I was expecting I’m now 20, I still live with my mum, my boyfriend lives in Leicester and I have a full time job as a HCA I’m currently relying on my mum for a roof over my head when baby’s born I want my own property and everything but it’s hard to pull 5 grand out my arse for a deposit 😂 and I think no matter what age you get pregnant it’s going to be hard u can be the most organised person ever and still struggle with child care and working. But then I also understand what u are saying I’ve been in a situation when everyone around me was getting pregnant and I couldn’t at that time

[shigh in reply to Hidden]

Thankyou so much for your comment❤️ i would like my future memories like holidays and stuff to be with my kids, i know lots of people have a bad view on young mums and thats why i am so scared of telling people but people judge people no matter what o i may aswell do what makes me happy x

[shigh in reply to pinkie93]

Everyone is different, i dont live with my mum. And also i work in a baby unit and nursery, thinking of my future and doing things i would like thoes memories to be with my child, my family has always been broken up and lots of arguments always happen so i have never really felt ive had my own family so the thought of me having my own family makes me happy. My boyfriends family are there for me more than my own family and i cant thank them enough for what they have done the past 3 years. I understand your point if view tho

[pinkie93 in reply to shigh]

Whatever you choose I'm sure you'll love your child beyond words and be a very dedicated mum. I'm not saying leave it until you're 30 but fertility doesn't start to decline until age 25 so you have over 6 years to build on your relationship, accumulate savings and enjoy being young before your clock even starts ticking. Trust me I completely relate to how you're feeling, my family are a mess and I moved out as soon as I turned 18, all I could think about sometimes was having a little bundle of joy. But there's no harm in taking a bit of time for yourself so you can make yourself the best mum you can be. Good Luck!

[shigh in reply to pinkie93]

Thankyou x

[roxannacar in reply to pinkie93]

I think it might have just been a poor choice of wording. But I agree with you at 18 you should be enjoy life as once a baby comes theres no sending it back and as much as you love them with all your heart they are hard work. It makes life a lot easier if you dont need to worry about finances whilst you are pregnant or on maternity leave and be a bit more stable in life.

[romaluna2015 in reply to pinkie93]

I can see what your trying to say . But it’s been a bit unfair with what has been written. Not everyone wants to Wait . What is best for some may not be for others. X

[pinkie93 in reply to romaluna2015]

romaluna2015 - I know my first comment was harsh, but for every young person with fertility issues there are 10 who are struggling with having a baby they're not properly prepared for. Relationship breakdowns, relying on unreliable benefits, asked to move out of rented accommodation with little notice, suffering from postnatal depression, putting a strain on their family or just squeezed into a parents spare room. Yes these problems can affect people of all ages, but it's more likely if you have a child before you're prepared. I know lots of people worry about infertility and everyone should be able to make their own choices, but these are real issues that shouldn't just be ignored.

[romaluna2015 in reply to pinkie93]

Things can happen with any age though. Age isn’t a reflection on the type of parent someone will be. Yes the poster is young but they may be living life comfortably . even if they have children young things may go wrong but they would learn to deal with things . It’s life and a learning curve x

[pinkie93 in reply to romaluna2015]

Fair enough, I will admit I have bias against young mum's. My sister was one and I missed out on being a teenager because of it, not going to go into anymore detail on that.

[romaluna2015 in reply to pinkie93]

That’s fair enough to not go into detail . X

[laurafig in reply to pinkie93]

I agree with Camillage. Everyone has their own pace in life and although for me personally 18 was too young, but 25 was also too young for me and I’m now 32 having my first.

I would also say not to take life so seriously and worry about retirement age when we’re so young. Yes we need to consider how life works but the world is changing at a rapid pace and we just need to enjoy every moment we have in whatever situation life throws at us.

Just enjoy yourself.

[pinkie93 in reply to laurafig]

laurafig - I've moved 8 times in the last 7 years (since I turned 18) and when you've lived in the places I have off less than £40 a week for utilities, food and everything else, it's hard not to take life so seriously. I've been the only able bodied person without very young children living on the 3rd floor of a building with no lift surrounded by drugs and air thick with cigarette smoke.

[laurafig in reply to pinkie93]

I'm not doubting your situation at all and it sounds like you've been through enough at your age.

As I said, everyone's life goes at a different pace and we are all faced with different life challenges. There is just no need to scare monger and advise against something that might apply to you only.

I wish everyone the very best in what they do, we just all need to accept that we are human and ultimately quite different people.

[ChrisWest1983 in reply to pinkie93]

That's terrible Pinkie!

This is the reason I waited for my baby. At 18 there was no chance I would have been ready or prepared. Dont think neither mentally nor physically.

I wanted to travel, to have a uni degree, to earn money, to be able to enjoy my pregnancy. And I waited. And I fulfilled my dreams and wishes - and felt ready.

Spoke to my partner and he was ready and I got pregnant few weeks later and gave a birth to my first child at 34. I had no need to work before getting pregnant, nor after having my son who is nearly 2 now. I had an easy pregnancy, easy labour / birth.

Now pregnant with baby #2 (again - got pregnant weeks later after agreeing on having a baby- but we have sex like every day, which probably increase the chances of getting pregnant rather than do it at mid-cycle only) at age 36 and I don't have any slightest regrets of waiting this long - I am happy being mum, staying at home and watching my bump grow and my Facebook friends traveling round the world / attending parties etc as I have done it all and babies are all I want right now.

Best of luck to all ladies!

[ChrisWest1983 in reply to ChrisWest1983]

It's kind of strange to read when girls at 18 wants to be mums.

I was still a virgin till 19 and was trying to figure out my direction in life. My interests changed by days. Baby seemed such a commitment. I was nowhere ready for this kind of a commitment.

I had no friends with babies - all were at the uni - then working and most my school mates have very young children now in their mid 30's)

I knew one day I'll be a mum (I dreamt of having 5 kids- no way : 2-3 is plenty I think now)

[Nin21996]

It’s different for everyone, usually you ovulate 14 days after the start of your period, but I ovulated later than that and didn’t realise until I started using ovulation test strips, you can get a pack of 5 for £1 in bodycare/ Poundland. You want to be having sex the day before you ovulate to give the sperm the best shot, I’d also recommend starting to take folic acid now, as that’s always good for the baby. Don’t be worried if it doesn’t happen straight away, or took me 6 months to get pregnant, and I’m now nearly 25 weeks pregnant. Make sure you’re both eating well and drinking plenty of water, don’t smoke, and my biggest tip is don’t keep taking pregnancy tests, I’d take several each month (only the cheap strips) and would always be devastated when they were negative, I found out with this one the day before my period was due, but only because I was in hospital with tonsillitis and severe vomiting (I have HG) and it showed on my blood test, but otherwise I would have waited until my period was late as I couldn’t take the upset of another negative test anymore x

[shigh in reply to Nin21996]

Thankyou so much! And congratulations. I just feel really inpatient, some of my friends have babies and sometimes i even get upset that thats not happening for me yet.

[Hidden in reply to shigh]

Patience is the one thing you can do. But if you have only just decided to try then you may have a long wait ahead. Your Dr won't even test you for anything until you have tried for a year without any success. X

[ChrisWest1983 in reply to Nin21996]

I ovulated on day 6 - so each body works different!

[Hidden]

If you don’t want to do opk if you have sex every other days from your period ending. Average ovulation is cd14 I ovulated on cd 9 this month my cycle length has been only 22 days u usually ovulate around 14 days before your period. Sex before ovulation is better so sperm is waiting for the egg to be released.

[ChloBo84]

Sadly there’s not much science to getting pregnant. It’s a lot of pot luck and just managing to get the time and day, sperm and egg completely right.

One thing I’ve been saying to my friend recently who is trying for her second, is, try not to worry if you don’t get pregnant in the first few months. This by no way, means there is something wrong.

We tried for 5 years before finally getting pregnant and I’m now nearly 35 weeks. But it’s been a tough journey with fertility clinics, ivf treatments which failed, and finally a miracle natural conception.

I haven’t put this to try and make it harder for you, but I definitely believe in trying to not stress when it comes to trying for a baby. We were on a break in between ivf treatment and weren’t really thinking much about it. Thought I would try out an ovulation test (first ever one I got a line with) after I had an increase of ewcm (egg white cervical mucus) and dtd around this time.

As previously said, try to find out when you ovulate, look out for an increase in ewcm, have sex every other to every 3 days before ovulation, and try not to stress out about it all. Age is definitely on your side, so just enjoy it!

Good luck to you honey! Sorry for the slight essay xx

[shigh in reply to ChloBo84]

Thankyou so much! And congratulations! This puts me at peace abit 😂 ill try not to stress and take what u said into mind x

[kirstyblue]

I would say buy an ovulation kit (digital clear blue is your best bet). At least then you can be sure of the timing. X

[shigh in reply to kirstyblue]

Thankyou! X

[mrsdala]

We used a period/pregnancy tracker, especially as my periods are fairly irregular, took a few months to figure out. But worth doing, as we'd been trying for 12-18 months before that.

And please don't stress about not getting pregnant yet! I'm so sure that stressing and overthinking it makes it harder to achieve 😂 as you said, you're still very young, you've got plenty of time, a few more months won't hurt xxx

[shigh in reply to mrsdala]

Thankyou so much for your comment! I will be sure to try that ! ❤️

[Unknown8]

It’s luck of the draw I’m afraid. Just keep having sex as often as you can, try buying ovulating tests to tell you if you are..

[shigh in reply to Unknown8]

Thankyou x