I'm new here, and terrified

[la-fawnda]

Hi I'm accidentally 12 weeks pregnant and only just found out, I'm living in a country where termination is prohibited and i'm terrified that me and the baby daddy are not equipped for this. How does someone make a decision like this?

I want to have this child, but I don't think there's any support available to me.

[roxannacar]

Honestly only you can make the decision as you know if you are ready or not. Have you spoken to the dad? Is worth speaking to any family and friends?

If abortion is something you want but not legal are you able to travel an have it done elsewhere? I would not recommend a back door abortion as you never know what you'll get! How about adoption could that not be an option??

Many factors to think about really

[Joyblessing]

That's a blessing just tell your self you will make it. And all will be well

[Mum-of-three-to-be]

I was in tears with my first. Never felt ready for any of them. Remember that you aren't the first nor the last woman to go through this.

Some have support, families, marriage and homes but feel they can't have a baby.

Others don't have any of the above and do want the baby that came in their life.

Out of 4 pregnancies only for one and this last one I didn't think of a termination. As it is a right of women where I live, it did cross my mind, not that I wished that would happen but I think it is something that lots of women come across in their decisions and minds and there are lots of emotions attached to it.

[aaa123]

Sorry to hear your situation, this sounds like an awful thing to be going through.

If you want to have the baby, there will be a way to make it work. You say that termination is not legal where you live - would you also need to be married to legally have the baby there (sounds like you’re not married)? If so, find out what you can about the approach taken by the authorities in a situation where the date on which a baby is born clearly means the parents weren’t married. If there is a risk that you would have the baby and encounter problems with the law, consider having the baby in your home country (it sounds like you’re living abroad rather than home country). This could be very stressful for you during your pregnancy and so if you can take yours of out if that situation altogether it will be the best for you and the baby.

If that’s not an option for you, and you can’t have the baby where you live, and you do decide to terminate, seek a safe, legal option in another country.

I hope you have friends or family you can confide in here, they may offer you help that never thought of, offer to travel with you for medical care or just a supportive ear. Good luck.