When occasionally good things happen..

I was made redundant just before getting pregnant and was preparing for a long stretch of unemployment and financial difficulty when yesterday I was proven wrong that maybe prejudice is not as widespread as I thought: a guy interviewed me with the full knowledge I am pregnant and out of action for the next 10 months! Even if I don't get the job he deserves many brownie points!

It was a refreshing change from an ex boss who incredulously told me "if I ever was in a position to hire a man or a woman with the same qualifications, I would choose the guy because before you know it the woman will be off to maternity leave" or another ex boss who while referring to a colleague going on maternity leave told me "lucky cow! I wish I could take 6 paid months off" (!!!)

Maybe interviewing while pregnant is not such a bad idea after all. It helps weed out the bad bosses!

[gigglysheep]

i can sort of understand mens mentality on this as they have very little given to them when they become parents. They have 2 weeks off on paternity and then it is back to business as usual. They get very little support and the women get everything. I can understand slightly how a case of the green eyed monster can arise. However, flippant comments like that should be kept within the confines of their head.

It is such a shame that women dont have full equality quite yet where this is concerned. Back when women got the right to work, they could only do so if they were single. once u got married, it was game over as they seen u as boarding the baby train. We have travelled a bit further from that but old school habits do die hard and those biases remain, although unspoken, and are very hard to prove as other "excuses" can be sought to appease a discrimination tribunal. Will we ever put paid to this notion some employers seem to have?

[Flossy1688]

I am a receptionist in Private Health Care a few weeks ago i had a client come in with her husband, i havent seen them since the beginning of the year so i let them know i was pregnant, while his wife was in the appt, he very blatently shared his views on pregnancy with me 1) All babies should be born with a bucket of water to be drowned in 2) if he was a millionaire he wouldnt hire woman or (not going to write what he put as this was racist) as he would have to pay them for getting "themselves" pregnant and if they take time off they are unreliable 3) Now because my partner is in the Army, he gets to pay less Tax than the man working along side him as he has to pay all his money to me as i got "myself" pregnant, (not sure where he got that info from tho) 4) i had a choice and there are procautions, "That" pregnancy could have been prevented and 5) im now going to get 9 months off paid for not doing "anything" . All to be followed up by his hips were hurting making him cranky, came in again last week said oh you shouldnt have stood up as i can see "that" now (pointing at my bump) then walked out saying "im only teasing as i dont have and dont want any children" im a push over and i must admit i sat there trying to avoid the confrontation, maybe my mistake for telling him in the first place, thought i knew the couple well enough to share my news. My friend who's taking over from me (NEXT WEEK YAY) said to put a not on his wifes file so she is aware of who he is as she said she will not stand for it, and as a 6 ft, fiery red head i truely believe her, others say i should have walked away from him and 1 even suggested i should have asked him to leave

Nasty nasty man, again im ranting i'll stop now

x x x

[Hidden in reply to Flossy1688]

Hi flossy

Whilst reading your response i must say that man you met whilst at work sounds like a "right miserable Ba***rd!!"

1st of all how dare he dictate to you what a burden you may (or may not) be putting on the your employer & society.

I rightly agree with your friend ( who you mentioned saying she would not have put up with it)

I do "sometimes" think that this is unfortunately how many people ( aka men) think about pregnant women these days as men dont get much reconginition for maternity issue do they!!

xx

[Flossy1688 in reply to Hidden]

Everyone who i have mentioned this to has said how out of order he was, he was an elderly man but just such an old grouch, My OH has read somewhere that its possible for him to take paternity leave for 9 months and me to go back after 2 weeks, he looked at me really serious and said "its and option isnt it babe?" to which my response was "Yes Peter you just need to start producing milk as i have every intention to breast feed and your literally going to have to drag me away from him every morning" bless him, something tells me i have a good one think it is genuinely that he wants to be with Ewan, not the getting 9 months off

x x x

[Hidden in reply to Flossy1688]

Apologies for my language but what a twat. And even if I was at work, I would have shared that fact with him...along with some more choice phrases. x

[Hidden]

Obviously it is really sad that the law (discriminating on the basis of child bearing) is not enforced but it is even sadder that our society does not recognise the value of children. Sometimes I wish I was Swedish!

[Hidden]

What A Prick sorry but don't know how u didn't say something to him must of made u Feel like u had done something wrong... !

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

I did report him to management. It almost cost me my job..

[Hidden]

And your ex boss babymummy also falls under the category I outlined above lol x

[ritz21]

No bosses here, but my ex-supervisor for Ph.D, who would be given special rewards/knighthood etc for his contribution to my subject area, is a childless middle-aged men who told me to degrade from Ph.D to Mphil. as I am pregnant and not waste state money on my scholarship !!

I fired him from supervising me !! and made a complaint against him to the college and to the scholarship body ! YAY !

[Hidden in reply to ritz21]

That is fantastic!!! Well done!! My PhD supervisor was a different kind of bastard: he had been fired from industry over allegations of sexual harassment but this did not prove an issue in getting a job in academia. He continued his antics there as well and I complained to the student liaison professor in the department who instead of filing the complaint properly, warned my supervisor that my actions may destroy his chances for professorship. I almost lost my studentship over it, but my second supervisor came to the rescue. I wish at the age of 21 then, I knew what I know now and had fought my case..

[ritz21 in reply to Hidden]

Good grief seriously, there are enough bastards in academia ! I had a Prof who has the habit of holding hands (he is a lead scientist for IPCC and has therefore got a Nobel Award which he shared with rest of the team and Al Gore). but people working with him for over a decade confirms he never went beyond holding hands

[Terci83]

If I was there I would have replied to him after he made his first comment that, it was a shame his mother didn't think the same!

What a b***rd