Advice please

[Jack1066]

I'm new here any help appreciated, missing contact with the outside world

After cycle 3 I have become very emotional, just bursting into tears for no apparent reason, does this happen to us all!

[Katmal-UK]

Hi, well it certainly happened to me and throw in whats going on in the world at the moment then I totally get how you are feeling. Not sure Id have coped with both! Im not on chemo as such (on a trial for Olaparib) and therefore shielding and finding everything emotional. I hope you can find some happiness in the world. Try not to watch the news too much, focus on comedies etc. Sending you a big hug. Kathy xx

[Jack1066 in reply to Katmal-UK]

Thanks, hugs are what I miss most

[Tesla_7US]

Jack10, Emotional lability is a hallmark of chemo. In 5 years I've had 3 lines of it and simply cannot edit myself any more. Crying is actually a relief in that it helps to excrete stress hormone cortisol from your body. Couple that with a world wide pandemic and crying is a logical response! No worries. This is completely normal! On the days I just want to escape I binge watch Outlander on Netflix. Love to you dear. ❤🧡💛💚💙💜

[Lyndy]

Hello... I think if you are anything like me you hold it together for so long during diagnosis, having to tell loved ones and then starting treatment, so at some point you do break down. It’s healthy to feel all the emotions that come with it and to mourn your old life. Having said that, finding support is also important because this disease throws lots of ups and downs your way. Take care xx

[SUE7777]

It happens any time, your going through a lot and it's even more difficult when your locked up. There is lots of good news on this site from survivors and try not to dwell on the situation outside it will sort itself out. I rarely watch the news now, too depressing. I've completed cycle 5 on Friday so I know how you feel. Take care Sue xx

[Hidden]

I cried buckets when I was first diagnosed, it is such a lot for the brain to process, something has to give. A volcano has to explode eventually. Take one day at a time safe in the knowledge that you are loved and being well looked after by your team. Stay in touch with family and friends, give them a call, I find staying as busy as possible really helps, especially if it is a physical task, gardening or as I am at the moment decorating. Also a good laugh works wonders, there is plenty to watch on tv at the moment, via catch up/netflix etc, and of course you can also vent your frustrations on here, there are some amazing ladies always ready to support you.

Take care x

[Laz66]

Hello, I was diagnosed ayear ago and had surgery then chemo which finshed nov 2019. I found the chemo very difficult at the time. I am very lucky as I am now NED. I am writing to you as I now feel very well, both mentally and physically, in every way. So, there is light at the end of the tunnel for you too but I totally understand the place you are in now. Stay focused on what is ahead for you . There are some lovely people on here with lots of good ideas to help you. Good luck and best wishes xxx

[SASSY196]

Hi Jack,

I am so sorry that you have been diagnosed. I agree with everything the other ladies have said. I was in a dreadful state when first diagnosed in September last year and still can be from time to time now. It is completely understandable and normal particularly given the added context of a pandemic. You are experiencing trauma and grief. As the other ladies say be kind to yourself and if you feel you need it talk to your GP, I take a mood stabilizer. I am just now looking for a therapist to talk to but I also spoke with the MacMillan service which was helpful.

I found nature helps, if you have a garden sit in it, get some birdfood delivered to you and feed the birds, if you have a dog or cat stroke it. I have also taken up embroidery and I often watch gentle TV like little house on the prairie! It took me quite a while to get to this point so however you are please accept your emotions and don't be hard on yourself.

Sara x

[Lavender2016]

Yes I was very weepy 1st week after chemo not sure it was a side effect - also I think it was hormonal as I’d gone through the early menopause without anything so don’t think that helps. One day at a time is good advice I think we are all struggling with what’s happening at the moment x

[Mumsie13]

Hi

I didn't wait for chemo, I had a major melt down after surgery. Set the whole gynae ward off. Way to go Jackie.

Yes I did get quite weepy after chemo from the start. I think some of it was due to the steroids which were making me feel quite anxious in the evenings. I certainly felt a lot better and more cheerful when the dose was decreased but I also agree that after months of "containing" everything it can be a sort of emotional release. I find anything that makes me laugh out loud helps - releases all those lovely, happy endorphins.

Jackie x

[Meridian14]

I cried EVERY first weekend after each cycle - I’m sure partly a chemical side effect. The crying was a pattern, so I knew when it would come, and when I’d be feeling most emotional and sorry for myself. I just went with it and allowed myself to cry, I would get so emotional, tired and exhausted of the pain, apologetic to all my loved ones for getting the disease, at least once or twice every cycle I would go through a bit of a melt down, but then I’d feel better for it.

I’m having Avastin now, and whilst I’m experiencing that has its own side effects, I’m not having any blubbering wobbles anymore.

Allow yourself to go through all the emotions, definitely try and take it a one day at a time, be patient with yourself. It sounds like you’re already half way through chemo. Hold tight, you’re getting there.

Much love, Lisa x

[LesleyGB]

Hi

I've had my first cycle (last Friday) and so it may be too early to be affected emotionally. I have felt a few times since diagnosis at the end of Feb that a good cry would help, but I can't squeeze out a tear! Though I can if people are kind to me! If having a good cry helps, why not go ahead (it is good for stress relief) and nothing to be ashamed off and a normal response to everything going on.

It is such a difficult time. I live alone and find not being able to even go for a walk very difficult. Social media and the phone is a good send, and so is this Forum - so kind, helpful and supportive. I am working from home (when the 7 cats allow!) but sometimes if I feel like it just abandon work, and go and read or watch a DVD, or do something else and forget about the real world for a while. Just take care of yourself and keep accessing this Forum - my lovely family, friends and colleagues are amazingly supportive, but it isn't the same as talking to people who are actually going through this experience and this Forum is a godsend!

xx

[Char8682]

Hi Jack,

I hope you are doing better. I'm very glad I found this site today and joined because reading your post and those of others about being emotional helps me understand that it isn't just me. Yesterday was the first day I was close to tears all day and I wasn't sure where my emotions were coming from since I have been through 6 chemos since last December without any tears and nothing except being thankful that my cancer could be treated. My last chemo has been delayed for the last two weeks due to low platelet counts and yesterday I got the lab results and my platelets went down instead of up so I probably won't be able to start this Friday either. That news and I guess being alone and cooped up because of the Covid-19 virus was a breaking point and I thought I was very strong, but, that news just discouraged me so much. I want to be finished with the treatments so I can get back to a life without the side effects. Also, when people who haven't been through having cancer judge us for being so emotional, it really hurts when they can't try to imagine what we're going through. I had someone say to me that there are people out there who have it alot worse with no treatments available and worse side effects. and I shouldn't be complaining about my situation. I was so devastated also by this yesterday that the tears were on the surface. I have always felt that crying doesn't solve any problem so I don't.