Feeling down

[Calboy]

Hi all mum had the Ivor Lewis operation 5 months ago ... And she feels really down and depressed some days is this normal after such a big operation ??

[kiddy]

Hi she has been through alot. Will she speak to anyone about it? We have bouts of frustration on what we cant do and what has changed. Things do get better. Maybe speak with her CNS nurse or Dr. Macmillan over the phone are good to talk with.

Would she post on here? I find this site has helped me.

Best Wishes

Debbie

[Calboy in reply to kiddy]

Hi Debbie ... She does speak to us does help a bit ... She just goes through stages ... I just wanted to know if this was normal after something like this ...

[liz_crisp]

Hi Calboy, feeling down and depression is common after the op. Partly because it’s the first time the patient actually has time and brain allows it, to realise what just happened. To deal with the fact that we had cancer and it seems everyone thinks we should be pleased we have had a major op, find life has changed enormously, food tastes different and our enjoyment of it is not really there, (it is more of a chore then a pleasure to eat) plus people keep telling you you must be pleased you are a lucky one and they caught the cancer in time.

It’s a lot to deal with all at once when you feel crap most times you eat, have low energy and wonder how, if and when you can get back to normality. Everything’s seems to take ages. It’s one step forward one step back and you don’t feel you are getting anywhere. What works one week is different the next, it’s really confusing. You are also grieving for the life you had before the cancer came, ( although many find life after just as good just a bit different.) It doesn’t seem like it ever will be in the first 18 months. It often helps to talk to a support group for oesophagus cancer or you may find your hospital has a Macmillan counsellor, ask your CNS she will probably know of a support group or may be able to put your mum in touch with a buddy. CheersLizzy

[Calboy in reply to liz_crisp]

Thank you for your reply really helps X

[slobjohnb in reply to liz_crisp]

Hi Liz, what a lovely caring reply you sent to Calboy. It's people like you who make this group so worthwhile. Keep up the good work.

[Iuypoi11]

Hello Caboy,

Sorry to hear your Mum is feeling down but unfortunately this does seem to happen quite often. I run a support group for oesophageal patients. Most of us are men so the question of desperession and emotions never gets discussed ( up we do spend a lot of time comparing scars etc..). However the first step in challenging depression it admitting that it exists.

I think there are two sources. There certainly was for me. Firstly, the actual trauma caused psychological issues, it's usually compared to PTSD. What helped me most was using the Macmillan counselling service. I had six sessions. My counsellor explained that during my illness I was so busy dealing with the physical and practical problems I had no time or energy to deal with the emotional ones, she described like all the dirty laundery you accumulate on a long journeys. During counselling we took each item/issue out examined it 'laundered ' by talking about it then putting it away. I would strongly recommend this course of action for your Mum.

The second problem is one I'm researching at the minute. This is about what happens as a result of the removal,of the Vegas nerve ( this is part and parcel of the operation). A lot of current research into both depression and obesity has established that the Vegas nerve is the route by which the brain releases dopamine ( the 'happiness' brain chemical). So far I haven't made much headway in terms of approaching this. One obvious solution would be antidepressants, another slightly more left of field ( and one I'm currently very keen on pursuing) and that is learning to love food again. I'm three years out and just coming round to,doing this. So it's a bit soon for your Mum but she can be reassured that there is a lot of light at the end of that tunnel. A lot of the time at my support group is devoted to talking about food, appetite, meals etc. .

Sorry about the length of the above but depression during the early stages of recovery is a subject very close to my heart.

In summary the message is, don't despair it will pass and you will improve. Seek counselling, discuss with your GP and hang on in there. Above all you've both made the first step in recognising it so you can now take steps to confront it.

Best swished for a speedy and thorough recovery to your Mum,

Mick Prendergast

[Calboy in reply to Iuypoi11]

Thank you so much for your reply means a lot... I will pass this message on to my mum thank you again

[Mentalmicky6]

You have to remember it's a massive operation which I was told before mine that the initial recovery takes about nine months, for a long time after the op I didn't think I would ever eat again but I did , and went back to work after about eight months and still working six years later aged seventy with no plans to retire. You must not sit around feeling sorry for yourself, try and set a target of things to do everyday.

All the best