mum in law

hi all my mother in law starts her dialysis on Monday and we are doing it at home as she lives with us. she is 80 years old and we are just hoping we have made the right decision as she also has alzheimers. we know that 3 trips a week to the hospital would be very daunting for her. we would be grateful of any help or suggestions as the best way to learn is from people who have already been through it. we are concerned with how mum will react, does this kind of treatment take a lot out of you, making sure she gets no infections, the cost of running the machine 10 hours a night etc. we are also a little scared ourselves. does mum need disconnecting from the machine when she goes to the bathroom at night. sorry if I am covering the same thing twice got so many questions so any help gratefully recieved

6 Replies

  • Why don.t you let nature take it.s course.

    I think it is cruel to subject someone.s mother who is confused enough already to

    something she wouldn.t understand.

    A ckd death is a very gentle death so the experts why don.t you let your darling mother go gently and in peace.

    God bless....vaw777

  • thanks for the reply vaw777. to be honest we have had thoughts of if it is the right thing to do but we could not forgive ourselves if we did not try mums alzheimers is slow progressing so we need to try thanks

  • You are absolutely doing the right thing for your mum in law. I am sure that despite her altzimers, she is aware of the care and comfort you provide for her.

    As you have said, travelling to hospital 3 times a week would be too much for her.

    Starting something new like dialysis is bound to be daunting but once you settle into the routine, it will become easier.

    My father was on dialysis at home for 17 years and after the initial change in routine, we all accepted it as part of our lives. We still all did the things we had always done.......

    We just had to plan ahead a little bit more.

    Talk with your dialysis team about your concerns. They are there to help you through this change in your lives and help you to cope.

    Sending best wishes to you at this difficult juncture.......

  • thank you mgt8 for reply we go on Monday to start our training nice to think you helped your dad to enjoy another 17 years hope we can do the same for mum. will take a list of our concerns with us now again thanks

  • Hi

    I just to thank you for making the decision to help your mother in law. You and your husband have obviously put a great deal of thought into the best path to take with a lady who has a major health issue beyond her renal problems. I have had experience of caring for my mother who had multiple problems and I too was really scared that I was maybe not doing the best I could for her, but I continued with the aid of her renal team. Looking at the practical questions most should be answered by the renal team but at this point no one knows what her reaction will be until you start. Infection is always a risk but if you are careful with your own infection control then hopefully the risk will be reduced. The need to pass urine etc during the night I suggest you request a commode to enable you to allow to be comfortable without being disconnected just in case. Meanwhile please keep in touch with this forum and I'm sure you'll get the emotional support and advice you will need and I hope the very best for you all in the future.

  • thanks kibbi90 for the reply nice to get it from someone who as been there done that.

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