When did you start buying for your baby?: Hi I'm looking... - NCT

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When did you start buying for your baby?

fridayfever
fridayfever

Hi

I'm looking for some guidance and reassurance really.

Currently 16 weeks pregnant with 1st baby conceived after 6 rounds of IVF.

I am delighted but also really anxious and don't want to tempt fate . Don't know if this is normal to feel this way or because of the current situation.

Husband is so excited and keeps looking at baby clothes, furniture, nursery items and doesn't understand that I think it's too soon. If I didn't stop him think our house would be like a baby store.

Thank you for any help you can give me and please #stay safe xx

32 Replies
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I felt exactly the same. We had IVF too and on our first had a miscarriage so was even more scared the second time. However we did buy the travel system at 16 weeks because it was a good deal but it stayed at my dads. I did just keep buying but still felt awful doing it. Maybe wait till your 20 week scan when they’ve checked everything with the baby xx

Thank you for your reply xx

This is what I keep saying to husband, I think I just cant believe after all this time that it has happened and we are pregnant and frightened to tempt fate. I have my quad test this week so want this out the way too.

I think husband wants to be organized as our friend had her baby at 24 weeks, thankfully he is fine and now home from hospital but they had nothing when she went into labour.

I hope your pregnancy is going well or you and the little one are if you've had the little one now xx

I didn’t buy anything until I was around 34 weeks

Everyone thought I was crazy but I’d much rather see the baby or at least be a month away from due date before buying things even though my pregnancy was v low risk.

5 weeks in and I get to still add to my collection of baby things and I find comfort in knowing that I didn’t waste any money in buying things I didn’t need. Especially because once you start buying it’s impossible to stop 😂 :) x

Hi thank you for your reply xx

This is it, my husband is usually tight but not where baby is concerned it seems, but I'd rather wait until further tests are done or at least half way through and then I wouldve have liked to take time in choosing .

I think hes been reading far too much about what needs to be bought.

Hope all going well for you xx

I’ve waited until my 20 week scan. That was last Tuesday and all was good with the baby, so we’ve ordered our travel system and now I feel like I can go ahead with getting ready for our little one’s arrival.

Glad I waited because now I don’t feel that niggle in the back of my mind. X

Thank you for your reply xx

Glad to hear your scan went well and you've reached the half way mark 😁

This is it, I've still not told many people either and obviously with lockdown I feel like I've hibernated. Maybe il come out after my 20 week scan.

I want the enjoyment of looking at items and choosing together when weve looked into them more but definitely feel it's a month too soon. Xx

Hi my love... I totally understand where your coming from. I waited until our 20 week scan and just got a few little bits. I ordered the travel system but collected it around 2 weeks before due date and left it in the box until I brought baby home. I also ordered the cot etc but again had it delivered around 3 weeks before due date and even left that in the box until I brought baba home. I’m quite superstitious anyways but I just wanted baby here at home before I went over board with getting everything. There’s nothing wrong with whatever you decide and you could just start buying little outfits you might like etc as that’s always nice to look at knowing you are pregnant...... wishing you all the best with your new bundle of joy coming your way 😘😘

Thank you for your reply xx

This is it, I'd rather be sure at my 20 week scan, I think I just cant believe we have got here after all this time and again I'm superstitious too.

My nan always said don't have the pram in the house until little one arrives.

Hes put that many pictures of cots, travel systems in front of my eyes hes driving me mad 😂

I just want to relax a bit at the moment and get through my nausea and tiredness.

Maybe I might suggest he researches and adds to a basket but doesn't check out xx

Hope you and little one are doing well xx

I was exactly the same and thought I was in a terrible dream and that I want pregnant and one day I’d wake up and it wasn’t real. I just could t believe that I was pregnant and that something was bound to go wrong. Looking back now I wish I was more relaxed and positive and worried less but hayyy hooo that’s life.

My mum and Nan both said having a pram in the house was bad luck that’s why I left it so late to get it delivered etc. Awwww it’s so lovely that your partner is so excited and looking and furniture and bits and bobs for the baby.... bless his heart he’s excited. Perhaps you could write lists of the items you choose together... choose a theme etc and do allow him to get a get a few bits but just not go overboard. It’s such a precious and exciting time and you are pregnant lady so my advice is enjoy it to the max and let your partner do some stuff Without being Mrs Scrooge at the same time 😂😂😂

I spoke to husband he liked your Scrooge comment 😂😂

I've told him he can look and then il tell him if I agree before he decides to purchase anything xx

Awwww lol... Mrs Scrooge ayyy... well you’re allowed to be!!!😂😂.... enjoy your shopping 😘😘😘

I waited until after week 28 then purchased the essential items like crib, pram, Bath, one outfit and bought clothes after 32 weeks. I ended up buying more once my son was born because I didn't know beforehand what I'd actually need or which types I'd prefer. I'd wait at least until week 20 after the scan. Congratulations! X

Thank you for your reply and congratulations xx

I'm hoping he calms down soon 😂

I'm suggesting he researches and adds to basket without checking out.

I think maybe his way of feeling involved as he wasn't allowed in the scan and probably wont be for the next one either the way things are going.

Hope you and little boy are doing well xx

Hi, try to balance allowing him to enjoy the experience with your need to be cautious. Maybe he can purchase one or two items and then wait to the 20 week scan. Remember that this is his journey too. Congratulation I’m sure all will be well...x

Yes I've told him he can look and then I can have final say in a couple of weeks 😂😂

It’s totally understandable your anxious after going through such a long and tough road to get there.

I was very anxious during my pregnancy and refused to buy anything until I was at least in the 3rd trimester (I practically refused to believe I was having a baby until it was safely in my arms). Our little boy came suddenly at 28 weeks, barely just scraping the 3rd tri. I then refused to buy anything as I was so scared he wouldn’t be coming home from NICU so just kept putting it off. We were told 2 days before Ollie was discharged that he would likely be being discharged soon so we had to go out panic buying everything!! 🤣🤣

What I’m trying to say is don’t feel pressured into buying anything yet if your not ready as there will be a time in the not to distant future that you will be comfortable buying stuff.

Congratulations on your pregnancy btw xxx

fridayfever
fridayfever in reply to Jenjen84

How lovely, hope little man is doing well now.

I think this is my worry after such a journey I'm frightened of jinxing it.

My friend had her little boy at 24 weeks and 2 days and she had nothing before he came home xx

hey, big congratulations! I felt super anxious about this too, but I we had a chemical with our first and felt it was too good to be true that we got a bfp on our frozen round but we did. I waited maybe until after 12 weeks and started buying bits, it helped me feel more positive and that it was actually real and that everything would be OK. I still now don't quite believe were having a baby at the end of all this as it seemed such a distant dream! I'm sure you will know when the time feels right, I don't think it's much about scan dates, but more so when you feel comfortable and maybe it'll help you start to move forward too 😊❤️ xxx

fridayfever
fridayfever in reply to HollyT7

This is it, it just doesn't seem real still.

I think the realisation came yesterday when I couldn't get into my normal clothes. Been working from home for weeks and living in leggings.

Quad test at hospital and they listened to the heartbeat and the little one was a lively little thing as it was almost hidden by the noises from them moving lol xx

HollyT7
HollyT7 in reply to fridayfever

Ahh, I've been living in two maternity jumpsuits and a maxi dress lol I feel like a right tramp but it's all about comfort by 37 weeks 😂 I just want to be naked tbh lol

I'm glad the little one is doing well! I started to take pictures of my tummy and that helped too as I could see it growing 😊 Maybe you could try that too xxx

fridayfever
fridayfever in reply to HollyT7

Lol, I sometimes feel massive and other times no that's just your fat love.

It doesn't help with this self isolation though, my boss wants to video call some days and I'm like NO you don't want to see me with scrapped back hair, glasses and any old comfortable tat on.

Not long to go then now, I hope everything goes ok, especially the way things are at the moment xx

Congratulations to you!

After the pain of IVF (mine was too) it’s totally normal to not want to get too much straight away...

I started probably after the 20 week scan, but was still very nervous and uncertain. A few weeks later I started to believe it could actually work out, and then started getting things.

My mom wanted to get bits and pieces too and I didn’t want to stop her enjoyment, so just asked that she keep them at hers until I was ready to see them.

You can get loads bookmarked and then buy once you’re ready. Also it helps to compare prices as you may get a good deal. Tell him don’t panic, there will be plenty of time! Even if baby came early you can get things very quickly if needed.

Once thing I’d say is that it’s never “silly” to believe this can actually work - it does work out - and don’t be reluctant to get excited because every day that passes is a good sign, and one step further towards the little one arriving.

There are a few steps to get through, like the quad blood screening and 20 week scan but then hopefully you’ll have some extra growth scans (I have them due to IVF and age) which are very reassuring x

Yes had my quad test yesterday and hopefully will have results Monday.

They did listen to heartbeat and the little one was a lively little thing as it was almost hidden by the noises from them moving, which put mind at ease a little.

Congratulations on your pregnancy too and hope its going well xx

I've allowed him to keep looking but not to buy for a while .

Fingers crossed all is well. Ooh if he finds some things he likes check out if they are on Kiddies Kingdom, they’re very good for bargains x

Thank you, that will keep him quiet for a while.

I love penguins so he keeps showing me the nuby range xx

I didn't buy anything till after 20 weeks.

fridayfever
fridayfever in reply to Seb9

Thank you, this is the date I've told him to hold off until xx

Seb9
Seb9 in reply to fridayfever

I haven't stopped buying things since mind, and little one is 8 months old now 🙈 so hubby will have plenty to buy.

I developed a reusable nappy addiction and most of my maternity money went on those, that and cake xx

Congratulations!!! Our ivf baby boy 👶 arrived in October. We started buying bits after our 16 week scan as we wanted to know if we were having a girl or boy. We went to the baby show the following week and ordered all the big stuff, car seat and push chair were delivered late August and we had nursery all set up around 30 weeks. Just go at a pace you feel comfortable with.

For me I was very anxious throughout and had to just take it day by day but loved shopping for bubs, he's got so many clothes, at many points through our journey I wondered if I would ever get to shop for our baby so when we got pregnant I couldn't wait.

fridayfever
fridayfever in reply to Vicky-01

Congratulations, ours is due beginning of October. Obviously a good month xx

We are trying to make up our minds about knowing the sex, but midwife did keep referring to the baby as him yesterday even though she only listened to the heartbeat.

My friend said hers did the same and shes had 2 boys lol xx

I want to buy to make it more real but not tempt fate.

I've also prepared my dad his house will be a baby warehouse when we do until we decide to have it at our house xx

Congratulations on your pregnancy ❤️

I completely understand how you are feeling. After my 2nd round of ivf worked I was so nervous to buy anything but ended up forcing myself to buy some baby clothes on the day of my 20 weeks scan! I thought if I at least started to believe it was really going to happen then I could start to look forward to it. I’ve been a mixture of anxious and excited throughout my pregnancy but I think most people are the same, ivf or not.

Wishing you the very best of luck for the rest of your pregnancy ❤️ xx

I'm hoping il relax a little after the 20 week scan and test results next week.

Starting to feel more real now though, especially with bump itching which my friend tells me is because of belly growing.

My friend does say its just automatic we become anxious as we are acting like parents already and shes since spent the last 8 years in that state or exhaustion lol xx

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