My Body during pregnancy - feeling v.down

Firstly let me say that I am super excited about developing a baby.. and that will not change...!

What I am finding really hard is the changes to my body and my shape, that I really didnt expect to dislike. Previous to having a baby I was a size 10 UK, I wasnt a lean mean fighting machine, but I had tone and shape. I have struggled with my weight and my own body image for years, but I was getting much better.

Finding out I was pregnant, I started to realise that there is a bigger picture here, creating a little life, and less time to worry about my own image. Everyone has told me that they have loved their pregnancy body, with voluptuous boobs, and curves in all the right place.

Great! Except I dont feel like that, I was a 34E bust size, and that has, in 24 weeks changed to a 36G/H - (soon to be bigger), and squishy sides that make me look like a hippo. My legs and bum havent grown but my hips have, my boobs have, my arms stick out more because my boobs are bigger, and I am really having a difficult time in loving my pregnancy body. If I walk past a mirror with no clothes on, I avert my gaze.

Is it normal to feel like this? Does anyone else feel like a hippo? Like I said before, I love that I am growing a baby, and I know some of these changes are normal, but I just dont feel very pregnant, I just feel more like a mammal.

I know post birth, I can get back to the gym, and healthier eating and Weight Watchers, but does anyone have any guidance to help me feel better about myself during pregnancy.

How I feel impacts my relationship with my partner, as I want to be less intimate because I am embarrassed. I dont want this to continue...

Any advice ladies??

xxx

15 Replies

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  • I can relate to how you are feeling, as pre pregnancy I was thin a size 10 on top 34D and 12 on the bottom. I'm now 31 weeks. Can't find my bra size in shops anymore (my 34H is getting small) and ended up buying a very unattractive bra from m&s which just says large, it it's too big round the back but it's comfortable. And my bottom half (where i gain weight) has gone up to a size 16. I am sick to the back teeth of wearing frumpy maternity clothes but what you gona do? I'm not prepared to spend a fortune for a few weeks.

    And that is what you must bear in mind! Just a few more weeks! Ignore the celebrities and posers. I'm sure you'll find very many ladies on here that agree - pregnancy is an uncomfortable means to a wonderful end!

    Chin up!

  • I know, it is about what is growing inside of me - and my partner loves the way I look right now, but I really dont. I am 23 weeks, so the belly is just popping - I think I am stuck between looking fat and pregnant lol.

    I am glad it is not just me though - I agree, I want to just look nice, but not spend a fortune.

    Sounds like I will be off to M&S for a bra also though :) xxx

  • I agree with you - probably the weeks from 22-27 for me were a bit strange too as first I looked like I have "ate all pies" - had a fat belly untill it turned into a nice little melon, and now it's a big watermelon :)

    And also about intimacy it's normal that you are not as receptive as before.

    So try to stay positive and let your men love you though all these changes! :)

  • Hi Dannii1986 - I'm totally with you here. I'm afraid this post ain't going to help as such, it's just saying you aren't the only one feeling exactly like this. I'm 21 weeks and feeling flaming ginormous, as you say like a hippo. I was also a size 10 with 34dd boobs before.... size 10 it will be a while before I see that again :(

    I mean we all obviously know what's coming, that for a child to grow, so do we (!) but I really am feeling as you are - I feel like my self esteem has gone out the window, I'm not looking forward to summer as I don't want to wear anything at all revealing, a burka is about what I want to wear right now, I miss my runs (it got too uncomfortable a few weeks ago), I have runners envy, I have skinny envy, I feel totally crap about myself.

    Of course, like you, I feel honoured that my body has given me the chance to be a mum (genuinely!) and happy to become a mum but this is wrecking me and I feel isn't helping my relationship with my man at all. He's not good at empathy or words or reassurance - this again doesn't help.

    M&S do fittings for pregnancy and maternity bras and the girl who did mine was a total gem. Worth it.

    What worries me is I'm only half way!!! I look at some of the girls at yogabellies and just freak out, thinking I don't want to get that big....I really don't.

    I guess 9 months in a lifetime is a short period of time and by the time the baby is here we'll probably have other stuff to think about! ;) This time too, shall pass and we can get back to working on getting our bodies back and concentrating on the little bundle of joy that our bodies have given us.

    I said to my man last night, I feel like I've gone from being a girl/woman to someone that needs taking care of - a random guy offered to carry my shopping bags for me yesterday....(very nice yes but made me feel about 70!).

    As I say it's just shared experience, sorry I can't be of any more help, thinking of you and feeling exactly the freaking same! xx

  • I am already nearly w36+6!! 😱 Time has flown away! And my bump has grown immensely (from consultant belly measurement of 30 percentile to whooping 90 percentile in last weeks appointment!) My man is a bit like yours - no empathy which saddens me often. Only once he said to me to do less and save myself for later. Most of days he calls me "fatty" which I accepted and now just laugh at it as he's right: he got together with me when I was a size 10 and now the way I walk I start to look like a duck :) Well- I remind him that it was him who made me fat 😂

    PS: don't write yourself off yet. Around 20 weeks I felt that I can't do much but then energy came back and I did 10mile bikeride 3 days ago, so stay positive! Big hug,x

  • Not long now!! 😀 I wouldn't accept man calling me fatty, end of, it's a baby which he helped put there - last thing you need is a comment like that.

    Good to hear you are still getting out cycling and have energy! Did an 11 mile walk with friend yesterday, it's swings and round abouts,sometimes I feel great, others shattered!x

  • To be honest I'm glad you posted this Dannii1986 - I think you'll find a lot of women in the same situation xx

  • I don't know what to say to help other than I feel the same. I got huge during my first pregnancy and people even told me so. My metabolism slowed right down but I was actually eating less. This pregnancy I thought I looked the same but with a bump. Not anymore. At 26 weeks, I look massive again. My toddler only just stopped breastfeeding which I think is why my boobs haven't grown this time so i am not in proportion! Sorry probably doesn't help but like the others say, at least we are in the same boat and it's clearly a normal feeling!

  • Hi, I'm sorry for you! I remember not really looking pregnant but just a bit fat! It might not change for you but as my bump grew and I looked more pregnant it was easier to love my pregnant body than the just a bit fat stage. Xx

  • M&S do some really good loungewear brad which are brilliant ( they are so comfortable and worth every penny ) xxxx

  • I am just 9 weeks pregnant and was at my slimmest before, having got married last year my routine is running every other day and doing yoga daily, I was a neat size 8 size 32d boobs and even this early in my pregnancy my bum and boobs have swollen and my waistline is expanding, although the fetus is only the size of a strawberry at the moment! I am unable to exercise as much as my body just can't seem to hack it now and this makes me feel rubbish anyway. It really is hard to accept the changes in my body even though I am so excited about bringing life into the world, it does make it difficult especially when we still haven't told everyone and I have to adjust my outfits to accommodate my bigger size 😑 It's good to know other people are feeling the same way, I really recommend exercising as it just adjusts your whole energy and I hope I start to be able to exercise a bit more soon myself!

  • I had the same feelings, I felt when I went out people would just look at me and think I'm huge rather than pregnant which made me really self conscious but as the baby grows you get more rounded and these feeling get less and less I think!

  • Thanks all, it really does make me feel better that it isnt just me that feels way. As Miss_slinky explains, I am very proud and honoured that my body has allowed me to create and hold a child, because I recognise this isnt something that happens for everyone, it is just hard, because I do feel I just look wide and not pregnant..

    I have been reassured that the next few weeks will see a vast change in my bump size, so here is to hoping that alleviates some of my fears.

    and a few months of this, for a lifetime of smiles and giggles with my little girl will be worth it.

    I think I was just hormonal yesterday and needed to get it off my chest. Your comments have all helped :) xx

  • That's a good attitude! I don't think I will ever get my toned body back but that's a small price to pay for the toddler I have sitting in front of me with porridge round his mouth!! Plus my husband doesn't seem to see me any differently. I think they are more proud of what you have done to create a family for you both!

  • Hello! First of all congrats on your pregnancy! Regarding to your concerns, I would say to embrace it, you feel low and that will make you less active and more prone to eat rubbish food, the only thing I can tell you is you are beautiful and you will get even more when you begin to feel comfortable in your skin... remember, after the birth your body will return to what it was before, keep hydrated put lots of cream on your belly and although you might feel huge just think, there's people dealing with that without being pregnant and they look awesome! Ask for advice on how to get cute clothes, go for long walks while you don't "pinguin" about and accept that men don't really understand that we feel that big because they love that we are carrying their child and we ar always beautiful at their eyes!

    Hope to hear that you get better and cope better with this...

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