Coming to terms with cancer returning after 11 years

[Beech-Tree]

Hello - I'm new here. I had primary breast cancer 11 years ago and got a lot of support from Penny Brohn UK then. I thought I'd beaten it but it has returned with a vengeance - Secondary breast cancer, Stage 4 and incurable this time. It's quite a shock and feels very different to the first time. Am permanently on chemo now. So I'm trying to get back into the Penny Brohn network. I don't seem to be able to be so positive this time.

[Springiebounce]

Hi, I have just read your post and I am in the exact situation as you. Was discharged from Oncology after 5 years, only to be told 4 months ago that a little cancer cell has taken up residence in my lung from the primary site in my throat. Incurable, symptom control only going forward. Initially I was absolutely devastated and had serious thoughts about ending my life there and then, but, no I wasn't going to do that. I feel it is different now as I know the outcome of this diagnosis, whereas before I was continually thinking, I hope the treatment worked and I am now calm about it. I am on meds from my GP to keep my emotions in check and I'll tell you why I feel calm. It's because I have now had the chance to organise everything. I am a Mum, Wife, Daughter, Auntie, Sister and friend and I do not want to cause anyone that I love any more sadness than I need to. So, all my paperwork is in order, I have written sheets with important names and numbers on for my Husband eg. Dog Groomer, Dentist, Car Mechanic etc. I have also contacted a Funeral Director and have got a price and sorted out my Order of Service. Nobody knows I have done it.Now, strangely I feel ok. I have sorted everything that I feel I need to sort and now I am just taking each day as it comes with the ones I love knowing that they will be ok. This has been the right thing to do for me, I know it's not for everyone, but it made me feel better. I wish you all the best xx

[Beech-Tree in reply to Springiebounce]

Thanks for replying. I recognise what you've been doing. I've done the same and I agree that it does give a certain peace of mind. Might I gently suggest that you those you love that you've done all this - they might be worrying about how they'll know what you want done. All the best to you too.

[rustyfairy in reply to Springiebounce]

Poaitive action, taking life forward and good suggestions we should all consider, I wish you all the best 😘

[rustyfairy]

Peggy Brohn great - they have the ability to make life seem larger than the tumour - my best wishes to you❣️

[Beech-Tree in reply to rustyfairy]

Thank you!