I had a really thought time in hospital and... - Meningitis Now
I had a really thought time in hospital and now at home I am suffering from a lot of nightmares and flash back. Does anyone get these?
Hi malaga, yes I also have had flash backs & nightmares. I suffered from many hallucinations whilst in hospital both during my coma & after I had come round. I found it hard to remember what was reality & what wasn't. My husband says much of what I said to him didn't make sense! I have found that filling in the gaps from my family that were there & doing research on the Internet has helped me. For example I went for another ct scan before but left icu & went to another ward. The experience I had was so surreal but to me it happened! I looked up pictures of the ct scanner & read about what happens & realised how I had interpreted the process. This has really helped me. Maybe if you can ask someone to explain things to you it may help you understand what you went through. I hope this helps!
Thanks 7witchywoman7 for sharing your experience. I am finding it hard to discuss with people around me because it sounds so silly but I am still sleeping with the light on just in case it happens to me again. Each night I relive what it was like in intensive care and each time I have a headache are pain in my neck I think that this is my time. It really helps to hear that others have felt the same as me. Thanks 
Its not silly to want the light on I understand exactly how you feel! My main fear is that I wake up in intensive care again! I have had bacterial meningitis twice in 2 years so I understand your fear when you have an ache or pain! I do think talking about your experience will help so if you can't talk to family try counselling. Maybe when you can open up your family can help fill in the gaps! This forum is great to connect with people who have been through it & sharing experiences. Its good to know you are not alone! Good luck! Love & light x
Hi there sorry to hear that you are suffering from flash backs of your hospital stay. This is very common especially if you have been in isolation or intensive care. I fully understand as I have gone through this myself the best advice I can give is to talk about what you are visualising to people who were with you whilst you were in hospital as they might be able to put a different perspective onto what actually happened to you whilst in hospital another suggestion is to re visit the unit you were hospitalised in it may look totally different from your memory Hope this helps it will get easier I'm 4 years past and only now can I watch hospital programes on the TV without visualising what happened to me - good luck
Thanks cassie.
Have not really spoken to anyone yet about what happened I think I have tried to put it to one side as though it never happened but i know now that i need to open up more.I know what you mean about watching hospital programmes I get all upset just from the opening titles.
i had exactly the same, the hallucinations were so real to me and frightening too, also flash backs and nightmares when i left hospital were awful i wouldnt close my eyes in case i didnt wake up again, i asked a lot of questions from family and friends to try and piece together what happened during my coma, this seemed to be a big thing for me i didnt like the thought of losing 5 days, the next 10 days in hospital didnt seem real, it really is an awful thing to go through, the meningitas trust were very good and arranged coucelling for me which really helped me get over my nightmares, im now 18months down the line and although i still get some flashbacks i can now cope with them, i hope the replies help you.
Thanks ceris
It's really strange to see everything you have written down is exactly how I am feeling. It helps to know that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. I think I might look into counselling. Thanks
let me know, on here, how things are going for you, the lady i saw taught me how to distract myself whenever a flashback appeared i still need to do it at times, there is a light at the end of the tunnel but dont try to rush things, it will take time but you will get there. take care. xx
Thank you. X
Malaga1981, This too shall pass. My medical records read that I "coded out" (died) twice in the ER. I was EXTREMELY happy in my life when I was struck down with Meningococcal Septicaemia & DIC. Yet, as I was dying, I vividly remember thinking, "Ho-Ho, I am out-of-here!" and feeling an extraordinary euphoria.
After 6 months in the hospital, I was released and still had pain in my lower legs & feet (8 on a scale of 1-10). Nightmares and flashbacks had stopped. Only pain remained.
Now, 35 yrs later, I NEVER have nightmares or flashbacks. My foot pain has greatly dissipapted (3 on a 1-10 scale).
I had no nightmares or flashbacks BUT I also took zero medications upon release from the hospital. Nothing. Are you taking any medicatios?
I had the same as you ignoreit. I have been taking tablets for the pain in arms, legs and feet and I also have pain patches. Some days are worse than others and I was glad to get home but still have support as I have felt suicidal at times. Dont know how you coped without meds.
Hi PamelaFrance, you ask how I was able to cope with the aftereffects pain after being released from the hospital.
I distinctly remember, while still in the hospital being told, "I'm so sorry but the drs have now taken you off all painkillers except Tylenol."
"Tylenol!??? Tylenol!??? You've got to be kidding!" I exclaimed. "You've been on pain narcotics for 3-4 months now and the drs don't want you to get addicted." (Even those narcotics were reducing my pain down to only about a 7 on a scale of 1-10.)
With only Tylenol in my system, I endured the dr debriding my toes. (That means cutting the coal black skin away, leaving live bloody toes...while I bit down on a washcloth.) Each time I would shake for 2 days afterwards.
Therefore when I was released from the hospital, my pain was sooooooo much less than my debridement pain that I just accepted the fact that this pain was a necessary part of my recovery.
Hi ignore it. It sounds like you had a tough time. I am not taking any medication have just basically been told to get on with it. Easier said than done.
Yes I do all the time and ive been home now 10 months.
Dear Malaga I had a lot if fear in hospital too although I was not in a coma. At night I could feel how close I was ... To something, but I was not sure what to name it. I had some scary seizures that I meditated through to manage. It's like you know that life and death are separated by a thin line. It's profound and scary. After I had fear of simply never functioning again. Eventually I accepted it but I still tried to recover. It's a very hard time. I reckon talk to someone, a good shrink, and talk to us. We all went through it in some way. I hope you feel better knowing it's not just you. Xx
Thank you rowenafly, your message means a lot. Reading these replies from people who have gone through the same things is a big help, knowing that it is not just me is helping me to think a little clearer.x
Thank you all. Just keep going.It does improve. I had pnuemococal meningitis in 2010. Don't have nightmares/flash backs. They must be dreadful. Don't really remember my 3 month stay in hospital at all as was in an induced coma for 5 weeks.
Enough of me. Hope all goes well for you all.
