Best Interest Meeting

[CT76]

Have my sons BIM this morning. Feeling sick about it all 😓

[Eeviee]

Good luck. Take notes. Ask for it to be recorded so you can remember what is said. You could use your phone. Be strong. There are so many people who have been or who are in your situation. You are not alone even if they make you feel that way.

[CT76 in reply to Eeviee]

I just feel that there have been a lot of contradictions from school and SW.. also options have not been thoroughly explored.. also my sons advocate has met him once

[Eeviee in reply to CT76]

Remember you know what is best for your son. You are his best advocate. I can’t remember if you are his deputy ? That carries extra weight.

[CT76 in reply to Eeviee]

No Im not his debuty 😑

[Eeviee]

I would definitely get that in place. I did it myself and didn’t have any problem doing it. Lots of forms mind but quite straight forward. Does your son have capacity to make these big decisions ?

[CT76]

No he doesn't x

[Tracidu in reply to CT76]

Good Luck . . You know your son best . Try to focus on his most difficult days , Hope all goes well

[Pogul44]

Hi CT76,

As you made references to school I presume your son is under 18. Therefore you still have parental rights and it is likely too early to apply for Appointeeship or deputyship at this time. It would be beneficial for you to investigate these options to make sure you have everything in place to apply the moment he turns 18 though, as at this age he is deemed an adult and you lose parental rights. As a deputyship application takes some months to approve an interim Appointeeship authorised and issued by the DWP is your best bet as it is issued much quicker.

As your son lacks capacity he may have Deprivation of Liberty Safeguarding (DoLS) in place in which case there is also the Relevant Persons Representative (RPR) role you should ensure you hold. I am uncertain if this is issued before 18 but you definitely want it in place after as it holds more weight than you have as a parent at this stage.

I hope all went well with your sons BIM yesterday, I have everything crossed that it went better than you anticipated.

Best regards,

[CT76 in reply to Pogul44]

Hiya. My son is 19 ( last year in school) . The BIM was to make a decision on the best placement moving on from school. We are very limited of services locally so decided on a residential college 2 hrs away. I dont have deputyship. I have the forms here to fill but they look daunting

[Pogul44 in reply to CT76]

Hi,

I would suggest you apply to become you son's appointee to manage his finances asap. The link below is taken for the gov.uk site and you should find what you need here:

gov.uk/become-appointee-for...

Once you have the Appointeeship it should help with any application for deputyship for Property and Financial Affairs. I do not have the deputyship for Health & Welfare as it seems to be difficult to obtain but I am using a solicitor to help ensure improved care now and good care into the future.

Does you son have DoLS in place as he lacks mental capacity? If so I suggest you check that you are registered as his RPR. If DoLS has lapsed and pending renewal they may say you cannot be his RPR until DoLS has been renewed, in which case you might need to keep onto them as to when it will be renewed. This has happened with my brother.

None of this is easy and this site is great to share info as there doesn't seem to be much useful info or help in general.

Keep strong and keep determined. Unfortunately that's the way you have to be at the mo.

Happy to help when I can so just post.

Best regards

[CT76 in reply to Pogul44]

Hiya, I am already my son's appointee.. since he turned 16.No he doesn't have DoLs.. who would I speak to about this..his SW?

[Pogul44 in reply to CT76]

Hi,

That's great!!

The link below explains what DoLS is:

scie.org.uk/mca/dols/at-a-g...

A brief extract is as follows:

DoLS ensures people who cannot consent to their care arrangements in a care home or hospital are protected if those arrangements deprive them of their liberty. Arrangements are assessed to check they are necessary and in the person’s best interests. Representation and the right to challenge a deprivation are other safeguards that are part of DoLS.

Therefore, if you look after your son at home it is not relevant but if he goes into hospital it becomes relevant.

You will find more info on it at the above link. I believe they have been trying to replace DoLS with something else the past few years but it is still in place as I think the new option was challenged. My knowledge on this is a bit vague I'm afraid.

Best regards,

[CT76 in reply to Pogul44]

Ah thankyou, my son is home atm but will be starting residential college in September

[Rupertthebear]

What is a BIM ? Stand for?

[CT76 in reply to Rupertthebear]

It is Best Interest Meeting