Gordoncanada, I just read your post and found a lot of meaning in it for me. I too have the same unhappy relationship as Witsend. Every day I obsess if I should leave my undiagnosed Aspie husband and move closer to my daughter and grandkids in a different State or just hang in there. I have been hanging in there for 15 years and our relationship seems to be getting worse. I feel like I am walking on egg shells too and have many of the same issues as Witend. The only thing I have learned to do is to try and find a lot of close lady friends and at least I can engage in mutual fun conversation. Sometimes I even take mini vacations with these lady friends. The last big one I had with my husband was when we went to Spain and he left me in a restaurant. I had the flu and the flight was not fun with a low grade fever and coughing. As soon as we arrived in Madrid we found our apartment and walked a few streets down to a Irish Pub. We had pizza while my husband was engaged with a word game on his iPad. After eating I told him I was going to go find a bathroom and he said, "Um". After the bathroom break, I found him gone. The waiter didn't know where he was but the bill was paid. I stood by the men's bathroom for several minutes waiting for him to maybe come out. Finally after about 30 minutes of hunting for him I left. Fortunately I remembered the address of our rented flat. Nervously and upset , and having frequent breathless coughIng fits, I walked back by myself and found the apartment . I looked down the street and there he was walking toward me. I asked him why he left me and he would not apologize but just said "I didn't hear you and thought you went to a store." This is just one story of many I have; so now you know why I like separate vacations sometimes. We now have separate bedrooms too. What is left?