Feeling a little guilty

I was raised in church in my hometown about an hour drive from where I live now and have raised my family. As I grew into adulthood I slowly stopped going to church at all, with my recent cancer diagnosis my father (who still goes to the same church) and practically all of the members of his church have been praying for me constantly and I'm convinced those prayers have helped me immeasurablely . I have recently been feeling bad with this feverish feeling and having rib pain so I have not yet been to church to see them. I told my dad I would be there this morning but woke up feeling bad and did not go, therefore I feel guilty. I hope once I finally start treatment I will feel better so I can go to church to thank all those who have sent their prayers daily, I hope they don't think I'm being disrespectful for not going these past few weeks . Thanks for listening,


9 Replies

  • If they truly want you to heal they will understand. You might send a thank you note to the pastor asking him to share it with the congregation.

  • Thanks Denzie for responding, by the way I noticed in your bio that you was treated with cisplatin. Do you think it is a lot better than carboplatin? They have mentioned using carboplatin on me.



  • Cisplatin is marginally better. The average progression free survival (PFS) time difference is just a couple of weeks between the two. Cisplatin side effects are much harsher. The neuropathy being the toughest one (my opinion there). You're more likely to experience nausea with cisplatin. Then tinnitus, sometimes it drives me a bit crazy. 6 years out I still have neuropathy in my feet. It never healed but it improved. I'll try to find a resource on the PFS time.

  • I haven't walked down the chemo path yet, but it lies ahead. Both of my oncologists have said that Carboplatin is the best choice for me because I already have tinnitus and neuropathy in my hands and feet from MS. Lots of time the decision of which to use is based on a big picture of the patient - your doctors want to minimize harm, and some patients come into treatment with risk factors that forecast potential problems.

  • Am not religious BUT could answer prayer by getting better SO would notlet guilt get in way of of your treatment recovery BUT thank you note would not go Amis

  • Your faith, whatever it may be, contributes to your overall well being. IMHO - if, via your own prayers, you are thanking them and the LORD - you need not feel any guilt. Concentrate on getting better then you will have your day(s) to thank them personally.

    A Servant of Christ


  • They will be happy to see you whenever you show up. One of the sweetest things I learned after I was diagnosed was that a couple of local churches had added my name to their prayer lists. It's a wonderful feeling knowing that others care.

  • RwHayes,

    Most "church people" understand why you haven't been coming. Don't be too hard on yourself and don't let yourself be too discouraged. Things will get better but not right away. Have faith inthe one great physician, Jesus Christ, and trust Him to carry your burden.

  • Rw,

    STOP the guilt! I was a full time parish nurse (faith community nurse) for a decade. We prayed for anyone we knew needed it. They didn't have to be members of the church, or even believe themselves, we just talked to God about their needs. It was done out of love. You have nothing to feel guilty about, you are listening to your body, and that is what you should do. Give the pastor a call, or send a note via your Dad, if you want to, but meanwhile God knows where you are and understands.


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