An ode to hep c.

[cityman62]

Beaten up,

Kicked down,

Feeling frail,

Friends regard you with a worried frown.

Keeping it dark,

Keeping it deep,

Running on normal,

Feeling like a freak.

Talking the talk,

Walking the walk,

Itching at nightfall,

Spasms in the dark.

Paying off old debts,

With nocturnal cold sweats,

Maybe now regretting,

Those reckless old bets.

[Tatjana]

Wow! what a poem cityman62. I just wrote to Bolly that I cannot describe how I feel and you have just written how I feel except I do not think I have any reckless old bets to regret lol! Well done you! xx

[cityman62 in reply to Tatjana]

Cheers,just scribbling,how are you coping with the drug regime?I've just about completed a week now,minimal side effects thankfully.Though a couple of mornings I felt really zonked first thing.Just like I'd been chemically coshed',which I suppose I have been!xx

[Tatjana in reply to cityman62]

cityman62 I believe you get tested for viral load next week? However you feel:

Remember:

Do NOT give in

Do NOT let HCV win!

I must now practise what I preach lol! xx

[cityman62 in reply to Tatjana]

I do have bloods on Monday morn,the policy here is not to tell you anything about your viral load etc,until AFTER the whole 3 month course is completed.xx

[dckimberly]

I loved this, thank you....to be honest, I've always figured what the Hep C was doing to my liver was karma, or, it was merely the consequences to bad decisions, you know? Being in the 12 step program, I get it about paying off old debts. Then I got the harvoni treatment, the brand new drug and in 12 weeks it was gone...now, two weeks post transplant all I can think is that along with 7 years clean and sober, maybe my debt is paid, in full ...I hope so, but either way, I know that gratitude is an action, not a feeling...and I will spend my life being greatful for having Hep C, and then terrible liver disease and now this gift of new life.....

I wish you joy......

Xxxxxxxxxx

Kimberly

[Tatjana in reply to dckimberly]

Yes Kimberley, you have done so well. How are you now? You have been through so much. All I can say again is congratulations. xx

[dckimberly in reply to Tatjana]

Thanks so very much! Big smile and hug from me! Xxxxxxx

[cityman62 in reply to dckimberly]

You know,in our society,I believe we're all a little bit prone to wringing our hands,and crying 'why me?',I firmly believe in the 'why not me' school of philosophy, nobody said life is fair,and nobody promised a winning ticket in the lottery of life.I think leaving aside 'bad lifestyle' choices,when you factor in genetic/environmental stuff and the rise of quick fix living-processed food,hermetically sealing our dwellings,suspiciously cheap/remotely sourced red meat,chemical overload etc,etc,its a bloody miracle any of us see 50 to be honest.Leaving aside our own specific liver issues,When you note the huge rise in young women's breast cancer and the frightening rise in Alzheimer's and Parkinson's disease its pretty bloody obvious were doing summat wrong here in the Western World-and we need to put it right-fast.End of rant,;-).Take care x

[dckimberly in reply to cityman62]

Nods..well, I'm a firm believer in the idea that some days, it's just your day to have a bad day..nothing to do with with bad choices or anything else..it's just your turn..so you deal with it..trusting that this too shall pass! Lol..and it does.

For instance, I had a fever in here for two days, they still can't sort out why, and just 5 minutes ago they ran in here to take MORE blood because my hemoglobin is 6.2. So they are rechecking it in case I'll need a transfusion in the a.m. Which of course I will..god, in the states, they won't let you drop lower than a 7.1 sighs. Still, it's a pain, especially since I'm a rare blood type with antibodies and I just had surgery 3 weeks ago on Monday..anyway, it's just my turn, I guess, to have a day that will not be so optimal..and I'll deal with it as it comes..what else can I do? Lol..ps I completely agree with you about Western Civilization . We are so far off the mark, and our loss of humanity is appalling to me, at best.

Cheering you on!

Kimberly

[cityman62 in reply to dckimberly]

I do hope you're feeling brighter today,I guess its going to be a 2 steps forward,1 step back situation for a bit for you,you've ticked off the biggest box though,keep on trucking,we're rooting for you.xx

[dckimberly in reply to cityman62]

Your right city man,and I'm trying to stay focused,and not be such a silly selfish girl and feel sorry for myself..goodness knows, I have been given the greatest gift any human can get...

Maybe I need to write some gratitude poetry!

xxxxxxxxxx

Kimberly

[cityman62 in reply to dckimberly]

Nah you're doing fine but you must expect 'hiccups',its astonishing, its like having a new lung,heart,even brain,(I'm on that particular waiting list ;-),you'll have highs and lows,I'm sure,but you WILL get there,a big high 5 from all us at healthunlocked.xxx

[dckimberly in reply to cityman62]

Omg.....giggles outrageously ...don't make me laugh, it still hurts..look I'm still on the new brain waiting list also...any clue how long that might be?

xxxxxxxx

Kimberly

[cityman62 in reply to dckimberly]

Christ NO,don't write poetry,you've witnessed the damage I've wrought with 2nd rate poetry on this forum,its not big,its not clever,and Frankly,I'm amazed the moderators havnt blocked me yet ;-),just be good,do as you're told,nod submissively,store it up for later,and then kick that nurse/doctor/consultant on your way out-,you know it makes sense...... X

[dckimberly in reply to cityman62]

Actually, I'm an artist, so I'm sketching..today is the first day, I'm looking forward to it..the stitches just came out! Woo hoo! Best looking backwards L EVER!

xxxxxx

Kimberly

[Bolly in reply to dckimberly]

It's only 3 weeks, you are doing so well... Stitches out..fab! Hope the fever goes and the Hb is back up soon.

[cityman62]

Excellent to hear your flying along.It IS like a miracle to be told your slowly being devoured by an incurable virus,then suddenly,someone hands you a get out of jail card in the shape of a harvoni pill/transplant.Its all a positive experience whatever life throws at us.If I had my time over again,I would live like a saint until I was 50-then like a Devil until I was 90,unfortunately-I did it the wrong way around.. xx

[cityman62]

Haha, you cunning swine you,I don't need to ACT stupid.....

[Tatjana in reply to cityman62]

Promise me one thing cityman, however you feel after next week, keep in contact. We both need each others support to get through this. xx

[cityman62 in reply to Tatjana]

I certainly will,so far,no drama here,you seem to imply my next week is gonna be nasty tho!?Don't tell me,all my teeth and hair will fall out,I'll rip off my shirt and start howling at the moon,or is it going to be even worse and I'll start slapping random small children in the street? Xxx

[Tatjana in reply to cityman62]

All I am saying lol! is we can support each other and that goes for anyone else on this HCV treatment.

Honestly, no teeth have fallen out, nor is there anything wrong with my hair, I asked my hair messer to check. I have not howled at the moon, anyway the moon is far to far away to hear me! And I have been with my grandchildren, so no worries there. Any more questions lol! xx

[cityman62 in reply to Tatjana]

Hey,that's heavy stuff,forgive my flippant attitude-its just how I deal with stuff.Quite a poem,and quite a story.xxx

[cityman62 in reply to Tatjana]

Perhaps we should all howl at the moon a little bit more often than we do,(he reflects darkly),suppose the neighbours wouldn't like it,thankfully,I don't have any...