A Poem.
I have a little Satnav
It sits there in my car
A Satnav is a driver's friend
It tells you where you are
I have a little Satnav
I've had it all my life
It's better than the normal ones
My Satnav is my wife
It gives me full instructions
Especially how to drive
"It's thirty miles an hour", it says
"You're doing thirty five"
It tells me when to stop and start
And when to use the brake
And tells me that it's never ever
Safe to overtake
It tells me when a light is red
And when it goes to green
It seems to know instinctively
Just when to intervene
It lists the vehicles just in front
And all those to the rear
And taking this into account
It specifies my gear.
I'm sure no other driver
Has so helpful a device
For when we leave and lock the car
It still gives its advice
It fills me up with counselling
Each journey's pretty fraught
So why don't I exchange it
And get a quieter sort?
Ah well, you see, it cleans the house,
Makes sure I'm properly fed,
It washes all my shirts and things
And keeps me warm in bed!
Despite all these advantages
And my tendency to scoff,
I only wish that now and then
I could turn the bugger off!
Read more about...
Like (12)Save post Report
The ability to reply to this post has been turned off.
Learn more Hidden 11 years ago
Loved it Berwick, that's a corker! xxx
(1)Report
Are you sure this poem wasn't written by my husband.
lol xxx
(0)Report
Very funny ...Audrey
(0)Report
That was good to start the day with.Lola
(0)Report
Hidden 11 years ago
Loved it, and I'm female. Sounds like my mum.
(0)Report
Love it. Sounds like my husband until, cooks and cleans.
(1)Report
Brilliant love it lol.
(0)Report
Clever, Berwick, if you make a mistake and ignore the satnav?
(1)Report
I just love this and to be honest, it sounds exactly like me lol
(0)Report
And me.
(1)Report
Hey Berwick who can we shout at (when we're alone of course!), use foul language to and say the rotten things to, we'd otherwise get arrested for but the blasted sat nav. We can even murder it by firing it out the car window in a rage (as long as we are careful to make sure no one is watching!) and we won't get sent away! Sara.
(0)Report
Think I missed the point on this one!!!
(0)Report
Haha, that was totally my mother in law. ...... indicate George ...... change down George ...... right hand down a bit George .......
(0)Report
Very funny and good.
I don`t have the distinction between wife and the tomtom, I argue with both, about where I am and where I`m going.
one doesn't argue back, and the other.............makes me sleep on the sofa.
Tom
(0)Report
Really great and so true, thanks.x
(0)Report
Sounds like my old man apart from cooking and cleaning. If he did the cleaning he could satnav me all day.LOL
(0)Report
That's a cracker to coin a phrase
(0)Report
Oh Berwick. I think this is absolutely fantastic. Laughed my head of and read it to my husband. Does you good to laugh. Thank you
(0)Report
Pergola 1 well then it WILL have to have the last word!
(0)Report
Pergola 1 then it WILL have to have the last word if it kills it!!!
(0)Report
Hidden 11 years ago
That's a corker. Was feeling a bit low today but that has helped. popplewell
(0)Report
Brilliant absolutely brilliant.
(0)Report
That was so enjoyable !
(0)Report
Brilliant Berwick just what we needed to cheer up a dreary Sunday thank you
(0)Report
Love it berwick. So much i copied it to my facebook page
Keep them coming!
(0)Report
LOL wonderful - thank you xx
(0)Report
We've just returned from a journey from Devon to Windsor using sat-nav for the first time ever so this made me chuckle. Thanks.
Beetroothead.
(0)Report
Great one Berwick. Doesn't say much for us woman. Or is it that all men are bad drivers. X
(0)Report
Or does it mean all men need looking after and telling what to do.x
(0)Report
Loved it Berwick. Does that mean all woman are the same. Or. Are all men bad drivers. Ha! Ha! X
(0)Report
Definitely Steph57. X
(0)Report
"Ha ha ha! Brilliant keep the poems coming! This poem caused me to laugh straight away,needed a good laugh Thanks,I love it, have a good week with many more to come!
(0)Report
that one is really clever berwick,, and very funny ,, great
(0)Report
A woman's intuition has to be expressed! She would be at a loss if it had to be kept a secret! God created Eve and gave her a big mouth!!!
(0)Report
I met one like that and she dances quite well, doing all those old time and new vogue styles. The problem and issue is when the music stops she starts just as per the above description- because she's a born and bread natural winging pom! some sort of press button gagging device would be helpful at times.
(0)Report
The ability to reply to this post has been turned off.
Learn more Not what you're looking for? You may also like... I have a little Satnav
It sits there in my car
A Satnav is a driver's friend
It tells you where you...
While walking down the street one day a "Member of Parliament" is tragically hit by a truck and...
Her First Date
I hope you're sitting down when you read it.
This is probably the funniest date...
- Subject: Afraid
People were talking in their church pews. Suddenly, Satan appeared at the...
I do not like Del Taco, but I was in California on business, there was one right next to my hotel,...
View more posts