British Lung Foundation
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My mum has end stage COPD and is receiving palliative care in hospital.Does anyone else have experience/advice on this?

My mum collapsed 7 weeks ago, was resuscitated and has been in hospital ever since. They put her on a syringe driver and we've been told on several occasions to say our goodbyes. However, since then she has fought off a chest infection, a urine infection and some days is sitting up laughing and chatting whilst other days is asleep all day. The doctors have said they've never seen anything like it and can't believe she is still with us. It's an emotional rollercoaster! Has this happened to anyone else?

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ha how old is mom,bernice

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Your mum is a fighter. She knows what is going on and wont give in. Tough on you but appreciate the good moments, while you can. All the best wishes - love Annie x -

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Sorry I can't help with any advice but my thoughts are with you. x

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Thank you! She certainly is a fighter. She's 74 years old and has had COPD for about 15 years. I live in England but I have moved back to Scotland temporarily with my 9 month old baby to help look after my dad and I guess I am just hoping for a miracle.

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ha never say never,to dream a dream and miracles were are they we never no but keep on holding on,be strong for mom she will feel it,she nos your there.bernicexx

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At this point in your mums life, all experiences are probably unique..... and precious and impossible to compare with others

I think you have to live minute to minute with your mum and rejoice in each minute .... as it true for all of us .. every minute counts ... she may move on and her health improve ... she may not ....

all you can do is be there as much as pos

live for the minute, hope for the day but do not let despair rule you

Beth xx thinking of you both xx

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Thank you everyone for taking the time to reply. Every minute we have with her is precious and I am drawing on her strength to help me x

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ha mom is lucky shes got you,her strength will see you through this and her fighting spirit will live on ,in you,bernicexxx

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Hello Scottishgaynor such difficult times for you its exhausting for you never knowing where the winds blowing next,as everybody has said enjoy those good moments you may well have lots more,and .........Breathe ...take ten minutes for you when you can and eat keep your strength up you use so much energy in this situation.Come on here and talk about your mum ,we are a friendly bunch of people.Takecare now Janexx

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Hello, You have your hands full! I am sorry I don't have any practical advise regarding your Mum. From what you say she seems to be a fighter and is no rush to leave! Try to enjoy every minute when you can but please take a few minutes for yourself - if you can. Take good care, my thoughts and prayers are with you TAD xx

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Hi just joined this forum tonight , and came across ur post. The same thing happened to my mum 4 years ago in May . Was told there was nothing Elise they could do and that she had a matter of hours left as I said that was 4 years ago never ever give up hope , and just because professionals say it they aren't always right my mum is living proof .. Thinking of you xxxx

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Hi,

I am sorry to read that your Mum is in hospital and not well. I care for my Mum with end stage COPD, she was in hospital 3 weeks ago but no where near as seriously ill as your Mum (this time) is at the moment and is back home.

That generation were sure built strong I think, sounds like your Mum is a fighter indeed.

One of the hardest things I find is the powerlessness I have to fix her and in accepting what is happening. I thought I had a bit of an awareness around life and death and our mortality but as usual logical rational awareness does nothing to help my subconscious emotions and processes.

I always remember talking to a very lovely old lady years ago. We were speaking about the First World War where her father had been a captain in a Scottish regiment and won a medal for bravery.

I remember her saying of his death;

‘We all come and go, dear. You are in my life today and you will go from it, I have been alive many years and I will go one day’ not in a sad way but as a matter of reality and fact.

It really stuck with me, she was lovely.

Your Mum and Dad are lucky to have a caring daughter and I would hope my daughter would do the same for me.

Best wishes

Phil

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Hi Phil.

I love that story. They are truly good words to remember. I hope Scottishgaynor sees this, for I would like to know how their mum is doing. This post is four years old however, so perhaps the situation may have changed slightly.

I hope you and your mum are well. Hopefully, spring is around the next corner.

Have a lovely Sunday.

Cas xx 🌻

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Hi,

4 years old? I didn’t see that what a twit. I get less observant on a daily basis.

Thanks for your reply though, I woke up early and couldn’t sleep so was looking through the forum.

Hope your day is good and health is well

Phil

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Not a twit at all. I'm just being a bossy know it all anyway. 😊😀 Funnily , I had a hard time sleeping last night. I rarely ever have a really good night to be honest. I got up at four am and just sat there.

Take care. xx 🍀

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