Just wanted to wish you all a very happy Christmas and good health with appointments on time and no operations cancelled, in 2023.
It’s been one Hell of a 2022 for me as some of you know. Losing John in May after his multiple strokes in January, it seems like the whole year as been me trying to get through each day.
Can I thank you all for the support you showed me, you might not think it helped but it did beyond measure.
I was talking to Johns best friend of over 60 years yesterday and said when does the pain stop he said it doesn’t you just learn to live with it!
So all have a wonderful Christmas take care of each other, we all have to remember to make the most of every day.
Very best wishes Pauline xxx
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Thinking of you Pauline - especially this Christmas after your difficult and sad year and thank you for your festive wishes. Hope 2023 keeps you in good health and the pain of losing your husband starts to become more tolerable. So true isn’t it, the saying: “grief is the price we pay for love”.
I have been thinking about you especially the last few weeks with Christmas upon us as last year we lost 2 loved one's and a few years now but my Mum and John's friend is right the pain never goes away but you do learn to live with it even though at times you feel you never will
I hope you have plenty of family ( your sons you might get to be with ) and friends surrounding you this Christmas and giving you the love you will need and deserve and John will be watching down on you he is always there and especially in your heart he will live on forever
Pauline I really am wishing you the Best Christmas you can possibly have and also I hope 2023 will bring you less pain and more comfort
Thank you for all your support you give everyone and I will say again and keep saying you were one if not the first people on here that accepted me just the way I am , gave me words of comfort and reassurance as I was heading towards my op and you will never know how much it helped me
Happy Christmas John as I know you are watching what we are up to and a Very Happy Christmas to you to Pauline 🎄 x
How are you? Hope you are feeling much better. I know how hard you find it with your anxiety. Sometimes you want to kick life in the teeth!! I was going to go down to Paul’s for Christmas but a month ago I thought I just don’t want to do it, I want to be on my own, and if I don’t want to get up or get dressed I don’t have to and if I just want a snack I can do that! When I was there in July it was such hard work keeping a smile on my face because I didn’t want the granddaughters to see Nana upset. So I will get through the 2 days as best I can, remembering the Christmas’s from times past with a smile on my face.
Hope you and your family have a wonderful weekend, wishing you a very happy Christmas and peaceful New Year.
I am not moving on and struggling and most days I feel like I never will but still doing my best which obviously is not enough
I wondered what you would be doing and Pauline with this there is no right or wrong in which way we do things and if this feels right for you then that means it is
I do not get on with Christmas at all and once when I was struggling one year someone said to me
It is just another day
It really helped me when I thought of it that way and I think I will try that way of thinking again
thanks, Jan as been a tower of strength, maybe because of what she went through with her Dad we seem to have things that happened to the both of us.
Life sometimes becomes difficult but with help and time we become able to breathe again. I am so very lucky to have a wonderful family, seeing the boys there he is from his very blue eyes to his crooked smile and his terrible sense of humour! Them and the granddaughters are his legacy so when we all get to the end if we can say I did my best that’s got to be a good thing.
Hopefully the weekend will be easier for you than you are imagining. I will be thinking about you.
Thank you for your words, I suppose being together for 53 years finding yourself with no one by your side takes some getting used to. But I know that he is somewhere out there making sure I am ok,
This will be the hardest Christmas you will ever have to face so lay a place at the table for him and raise a glass to him; put photos around and make it a time to remember the happy times. The pain never ever goes but you need to replace it with the happy times and memories so that in time, it becomes bearable. Cry for what's gone but also remember to smile at what was.
Hello PaulineI was only thinking about you the other day! Thank you again for all the help and support you gave me when I had my op, and which you continue to give others. It really does make a difference.
Will you be seeing either ( or both) of the boys over Christmas?
morning, hope your doing really well. I have made the decision to stay in Scotland, I was due to fly down to Southampton today, but when I was there in July to scatter his ashes it was such hard work trying to be smiling Nana so now if I want to stay in my PJs or just have a snack that’s ok! As it’s been said before it’s 2 days and the will come and go, can remember my Mum when I was young she used to say after Christmas lunch well it’s as far away as ever!
Hello Pauline, sending Christmas greetings to you too. This is a year of ‘new firsts’ and of some sad anniversaries, but will also give us memories to cherish and raise a smile.
I have put away the sympathy cards this week and put up both the Christmas cards and tree, time for a few steps into a new future.
The support of this group is invaluable and just knowing that someone will respond with an answer or some encouragement is a great comfort.
Enjoy Christmas and all the best wishes for a fulfilling and healthy 2023.
As you say it’s a year of firsts for both of us. It was my birthday at the end of November and the first without a card from John in 53 years, even when he was going to be away at sea he would buy a card before he left and post from somewhere in the world. Now Christmas and the 3rd January would have been our 53rd wedding anniversary. So they all seem to come one on top of the other!
Hope your doing ok, or as ok as we can be.
Have a peaceful Christmas
Love Pauline x
Hi Pauline
You are an inspiration to us all on here and I’d like to thank you for all the wonderful support you have given me and others throughout your own terrible year. Your loss was so cruel. Sending hugs if it helps at all.
I know you have a supportive family and wish you and yours all the best for a lovely Christmas. I hope 2023 is a positive time for you.
Hello Pauline, I hope you have a relaxing and peaceful Christmas and I hope that 2023 is a year of good health for you. Your support on this forum is very much appreciated. Take care, Judi
Many thanks for the lovely Christmas greetings Pauline which are warmly reciprocated. I will be thinking about you this weekend. Hoping that 2023 will be a year of healing and good health for you.
Happy and Peaceful Christmas Pauline. The first of everything without your loved ones by your side is the hardest but you will get through it and when you look back on the 27th Dec you will realise how strong you are and how resilient- more than you actually realise. John will always be in your heart and will give you strength. But do what YOU want to do over Christmas but try and give him a smile amongst the tears and treasure the memories you had together and remember how lucky you both were to have shared your life’s together ❤️❤️. You will get through Christmas, I know you will. Sending you love, joy and happiness and best wishes for 2023 ❤️🧚🏼♀️
in reply to Pauline and bekind28 in spite of all you have gone through you still give back to others . It means a lot to most on this forum that cannot open up to their worries and anxieties.
Your right Christmas is just another day.This year my husband and myself are alone because my family cannot stretch themselves and live away from us.I was feeling sorry for myself when two days ago my husband took ill and I feared the worst! Today he is back to his old self and that’s the one , if our loved ones and ourselves are well everything else is immaterial and trivial and sometimes we look for worries.
The pain your feeling is because of the love you have lost.How lucky was John.
The pain will dim with time and replaced by the best memories you hold dear.
You will get through the next few days with the love of your family and friends .Take care and continue being the loving caring person you are.That goes for you both.💕💕
Hi Pauline I have been thinking about you lately as I know how hard this time of year can be if you have lost someone. It is a day of thinking back to all the lovely times you had with John over the years and I am sure there will be many. I hope you will be all right, and I speak for many on this forum to say we all appreciated the time and support that you have given us over the years and we are here if you ever need a chat. Take care chary xx
Hi Pauline, Sending a hug 🤗 and best wishes for a better year for you - losing your husband is so traumatic but on good days try to think he’s always with you in heart and mind so everywhere you and everything you do he’ll be with you. Take him places you’ve never been and do things you’ve never do 🤗😊. Thinking of you xx
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This is what happens post ICD Happy Christmas all
Happy Christmas - 6th January 
Late Happy Christmas
