I don't know if you are all aware that Katiejj tried to delete her account yesterday. In her post she stated that being labelled a racist for her jokes, and all the furore was the main reason behind her decision..
However, I have heard from Katie, and she has asked me to let you all know, that the uproar and some of the abuse thrown at her was really just the straw that broke the camels back. In fact, she is having a really hard time of it just now, with a lot of personal issues going on, as well as being unwell. As we all know trying to resolve personal problem when ill is difficult to say the least, so in her own words, " I am in a dark place just now". She is aware that we all know what that is like, and wanted you to understand her reasons for feeling as she does.
I do not think now that she will delete her account, but may not post for a while, as she tries to sort things out and get thinking clearly. I know she will be appreciative of any support.
Let us hope she manages to sort her problems out soon.
You know you have our support Katiejj, so don't be a stranger, and take care.
hugs from Huggs xxx
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I really have done nothing, but passed on a message so that people are aware of the true situation as it sounds like Katie needs friends right now, but I was glad to be able to clarify the situation.
" huggs.... you have a Beautiful Heart, a Heart of gold and so caring, i am so happy that i am now one your friends. and i really hope that Katiejj starts to feel a whole lot better soon. a New Year looming. so hopefully for all of us a New Beginning. a New Beginning to a healthier New Year ahead for us all.Huggs!! ..HAPPY NEW Year!!!!. ((hugs)) For Huggs,,Megan.."
You are getting me all embarrassed now! Thank you, and I hope you had a nice Christmas with your lovely collies. I am a collie girl myself, but sadly I am unable to look after a dog now.
Katie will be appreciative of your support, as she will be of everyone's.
I will be glad to see the back of this year in a number of ways, but in another way there has been a silver lining as I have met so many lovely people, which ordinary I wouldn't have done.
Hi hugs, thanks for letting us know about katiejj, I am so sorry she is in such a bad place just now and hope she will be back on here with us soon and feeling much better.
Ahh that's horrible for Katie I don't know the post your talking of Huggs? But please tell Katie that she is part of our family and we do care. Nobody should feel as she has and I really hope she finds the courage to come back in don't forget there are hundreds of lovely souls here.
Thanks Huggs for letting us know. Blessings Janexxx
Katie posted yesterday, stating that she had tried to delete her account, but had been unsuccessful. I messaged her immediately, as we had 'talked' before about all the fall out from the jokes, and told her what you have suggested. I think the jokes were the final straw for her, but not the reason she is in such a dark place right now, and was probably hoping to open up or find someone through posting jokes, but it all went wrong, but I have urged her not to delete her account, but take a break if needed, and she can come on and read but not post if she doesn't feel like it. From what she said she just needs space, and time to think clearly about several issues.
I am pretty sure she will come back in time, she just has too many problems at the minute. I hope she is reading the messages for her.
Take care Jane, and hope you are not too tired after your lively day yesterday.
Ahh that's horrible for Katie I don't know the post your talking of Huggs? But please tell Katie that she is part of our family and we do care. Nobody should feel as she has and I really hope she finds the courage to come back in don't forget there are hundreds of lovely souls here.
Thanks Huggs for letting us know. Blessings Janexxx
Thank you Huggs, I can understand how easy it is to get hurt by remarks made online, and I am sorry Katie has suffered this way. Hopefully Katie will be back with us shortly, she will be missed. Take care and hugs to you and Katie xx
I am sure Katie appreciates your support and understanding. To clarify, she has been hurt by remarks made online, but that is not the reason she is not posting for a while or tried to delete her account. She has a number of personal problems as well as ill health that have to be sorted out with a clear head, and getting some hurtful comments on here didn't help, but that is not the reason she tried to delete her post.
Hi Huggs, sorry to hear about Katie, I don't really know her but can imagine how it must feel being the subject of of any type of abuse. I wish Katie all the best for 2015 and suggest that contempt is the best form of medicine for this sort of behavior. Good luck to Katie in trying to sort her personal issues. love Ruth x
thanks for that, and I don't really know her well either, but just happened to be around at the time. Katie will appreciate your support, but the person has reported several people about the joke issues.
Take care,
hugs from Huggs xx
Poor lady...and all she put on was a silly joke...these people who sit there huddled over their keyboard thinking of nasty things to say need to get a grip of themselves and have a think about how much they might be distressing someone...please give her my very best of wishes when you 'speak' to her next xxx
Thank you for replying for which Katie will appreciate I am sure. Its true that it is all to easy for people off a certain mindset to be a bit nasty, and unless a joke is downright offensive or distasteful there is no need for negative posts about it. If a person doesn't find it funny, just move on to something else.
I hope Katie will read these replies herself, as I think she needs time and space for clear thinking to sort her problems out, and I don't think I will be in touch for a little while, unless she gets in touch with me, as I want to respect her need for space and time.
She knows how to get in touch with anyone if she needs to, and I am sure all your messages will help her feel less rejected now. Katie did emphasise that it was her own problems which led to her post yesterday, and the reaction to her jokes were just the final straw.
Hi huggs, having been on one side of the debate about those kind of jokes, i just want to say here that i never though of Katie as racist. I do believe there is a place of this type of discussion and compared to previous ones a year or so back this was pretty civilised.
However i can quite see that being in a bad place Katie would find it disturbing. I feel sorry that my posts have probably contributed to this.
I do not believe Soulsaver's post was appropriate and while i think its ok to disagree with other members' posts, this always needs to be done sensitively as we are all to some extent treading a knife-edge managing our difficult conditions in an able bodied world and dealing with difficult emotions a lot of the time.
I didn't see Katie's post so thanks for alerting us huggs. I will be posting to her directly there.
I don't think that your posts would have distressed her at all. I do think that soulsaver was over the top in her response, but as you say we have to have the freedom to disagree, but there is a way to go about it, and there was no need for all of this.
Katie did make it clear to me, that despite the wording in her post, her real reasons were her problems that she is experiencing, and all the furore following the jokes, comments made etc were the final straw for her at the moment, which is another reason we have to be careful on how we respond to people, as we don't really know how a person really is.
I think if Katie had been in a better place, the comments made about her and her jokes would not have hurt her so much, but for now she needs time and space, and friends and reassurances I think. I am sure she will appreciate you getting in touch, but you did not cause any offence O2.
Cheers huggs - I have now located and replied on Katie's post. I may not have caused direct offence but it must have been disturbing to Katie to see the volume of stuff her post kicked off. At least i can imagine times when i would have been disturbed.
This is a good lesson to learn to put one's points in as sensitive a way as possible.
You just carry on being the lovely supportive person you are, huggs.
I am sure Katie will appreciate your post, which I haven't had a chance to see yet. To be honest, I think I would have been upset as well, because if you post something in innocence and with no intention of hurting or being malicious, it would be a shock and hurtful to be on the receiving end of some of the comments. We are all adults here, and can surely disagree without hurting another person in the process, and if we do it unintentionally then we should take responsibility for that. You have just done that, and there was no need to, because you didn't cause offence, but you have a conscience and were worried that you may have contributed to the overwhelmingness ( a completely new and made up word. lol) that Katie felt.
Thanks O2, and all the best for 2015, but I hope to be in touch with you when I get a minute as there is something I need to ask you.
It was you Huggs that Katie choose to confide in so yes thank heaven for people like you. Katie will need to find her way forward now and grow strong again. We can help her by supporting her wholeheartedly. Rehashing the rights wrongs of the past would be a step backward and that's the last thing she needs. Give her big hugs from me along with all the others. Like Bobbie said 'One day the sun will shine and drive that dark place away'. We do care and we'll all be delighted when she starts posting here again. Big hugs to you too!
Thanks for that, and I hope Katie is reading all these replies herself, as I am sure they will give her a boost and help wash away some of the negativity she felt. I, 100% agree with you, that there is nothing to be gained by going over what has happened. It is done now, and its time to draw a line under it, and move on, and learn a lesson along the way, which is that we should all reply to posts sensitively as we don't really know how a person really is, as its all to easy to put on a face, and not to admit to anything being wrong. We are all different and cope in different ways.
I couldn't agree with you more, and if we unintentionally hurt someone, and it is brought to our attention then anyone with integrity would apologise.
I believe humour is a huge part of our mental well being, and to be honest if this forum didn't have it, I wouldn't be here. There is also so much to learn here as well, and all the support and camaraderie so its all good, and when Katie feels better I am sure she will be back. She has to sort some things out first, but I am sure all these replies will boost her.
Take care,
hugs from Huggs xx
Please pass on my love too Huggs. I think we all know what it's like being in a dark place and she has my support. I hope she feels able to come back soon. x
I am hoping that Katie will be reading these replies herself, and once she has moved on from the darkness I am sure she will return, and she does know that we all understand these dark places, as that is what she said in her message.
Hopefully, it will not be too long before she returns, but at least she is able to see all the support she is getting, which must help her.
Please tell Katie that we genuine ones love and support her. Tell her to ignore the bigots, they are just sad people with nothing much in their lives. I do hope she manages to sort out any problems she has. When she is ready, she will be welcomed back with open arms. xxx
A big thank you hugs for keeping us in the loop. xxxx
You are welcome must carry on, and I am sure Katie will be reading these messages herself, and will be very grateful and maybe even surprised at the response she has received. The main thing, I think, for her is to get her problems sorted out, and that is difficult at the moment as she isn't well either.
Morning Hugs , feel so sorry for Katie, when you do get in touch with her remind her that, Friends are like stars, you don't have to see them to know they are there,, all the best for 2015. Bulpit
I am hoping she will be reading these responses herself, and being boosted by them. I know she will be helped by all the advice you have all given her, and will be welcomed back.
Thanks Huggs for letting us know that Katiejj is going through a rough time , I am sure when this is sorted she will come back to us or who knows in the meantime if she needs support hopefully she will turn to us xx
You are welcome, and I think as she is also feeling unwell, that when that passes she will feel stronger and more able to sort things out, and as you say, turn to people here for support.
thank you for saying that, but I am not amazing at all, just another person trying to soldier on and make the best of my situation. There are lots of inspirational people on this forum, but I don't think I am one of them lol. Take care,
Hi Huggs, thanks for letting us know about Katiejj, please pass on my best wishes for quick recovery from her health problems, and a good resolve to her personal ones. Hopefully she knows we are all here for her, and will be willing to offer any support she needs. Please tell her she is in my thoughts, and I will be pleased when she feels a bit better and can come in here again when she feels like it.
Sending her love and best wishes, (and you too for being such a kind, thoughtful person)
Hopefully 2015 will be a better year for all of us.
You are welcome, and I hope Katie is reading all these lovely messages of support for herself, and I hope you are right and she will see she will get plenty of support from people here if she needs it.
I hope she feels able to return soon, and when she feels less ill she might do that, you never know.
you just stick in katie, i cant imagine how anyone could complain about" jokes" a jokes a joke, and meant to make folks smile,make them feel better etc. some smile at one thing, while some another, we all have a different sense of humour,
,,,,,,,, but unfortunately you get the odd one who has absolutely no sense of humour whatsoever, this person has to be pitied ,,
i hope you feel better katie, and get your heath problems resolved lots of love jimmy xxx
So good that Katie hasn't deleted her account - much better for her to take 'time out' as this is such a good supportive website the majority of the time, and I think every one of us benefits from it. All good wishes to her and hope to see her back soon xx
Yes, it does say it all really. It is sad, and a lesson to us all, that although we all have the right to disagree, there is a way of expressing it, without being nasty or insensitive. All of us, are on this forum for a reason, which is health problems and we don't know how a person is feeling or what other things they are going through, so should bear that in mind.
A sense of humour is a must of most, to help get through the day and lighten our outlook for a while.
Hi Huggs, and Katiejj if you are still in touch on this site, I think I mentioned this before, everyone understands what it is like to be feeling down and just 'not well' here, and PARTICULARLY at this time of year. You are not alone in that respect, Katie. I had some input on your posting which was really quite lighthearted because I do laugh a lot at some of the jokes I read, no matter who they are about: blondes, Irish, you name it, I have laughed...If someone put a joke on about a Northern Irish brunette with bendy joints I'd have a shout but I'd still be laughing. That doesn't come over on the site unfortunately, because we can't see each other's expressions or hear the tone of voice but that's stating the obvious, isn't it! The main thing I want to say is that you didn't offend me or the majority of anyone else who responded. That's all you need to know. Take care dear lady and get back on the site, for goodness sake. In fact come back with another joke. The silliest one you can think of! Happy 2015.
Thanks for responding and I am sure Katie will appreciate it, along with all the other messages of support. We all have the right to disagree, and some things people will find funny and others not, but that is life, and unless a joke is downright distasteful, or offensive I don't think there is a lot to get stirred about, but also have to realise that others might find certain topics offensive even if there is no intent to hurt or be malicious.
I am sure Katie will really appreciate your comments and be the first to admit that what you say is true. Anyway, it was just the particular comments from one person that was the straw that broke the camels back, and I am sure that if she had been feeling better and did not have other problems, she wouldn't have felt like that, and she would still be posting jokes! lol
Take care,
hugs from Huggs xxx
Thanks Huggs, my thoughts are with Katiejj, and only echo your post. Sheila Xx
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