Caregiver trauma

Interesting article regarding the toll cancer takes on caregivers.

medpagetoday.com/psychiatry...

[erjlg3]

An interesting article. Thank you for posting Bill. Caregiving is tough.... so be kind everyone....even when you feel like you can't. It will make it easier on our health which in turn will help your health

Most sincere 🙂

🌼Jackie

[teamkv]

Yes it’s tough. But I would do nothing else than give my husband 200% of my focus into research, study, reading and searching to give the best QOL possible. The deepness and richness of our relationship now is very priceless to me. It’s not just the two of us at home as our son (who has autism) is 19 and lives with us. So this ole gal is a bit thin. My husband was diagnosed in June of this year. The jury is still out on what stage. He’s a Gleason 7, PSA 60 and perhaps in the tailbone. Ct said no, bone scan was possible in the tailbone. No pain so? I think it was probably starting there with such a high PSA. Anyway he got a Lupron shot and was on casodex for two weeks. Been approved for Zytiga and I noticed an insert on the stuff they gave use for doxitel. So who knows what they will recommend.

Kinda hard to swallow that this is our life from now on. But it is what it is. We are 57. Married almost 28 years. Not gonna lie, I cry when I’m alone a lot.

[Steph1234 in reply to teamkv]

Aww, Hugs to you.

[Scruffybut1 in reply to teamkv]

I have incurable metastatic prostate cancer. My wife is a nurse and I hate the fact she nurses patients in hospital all day and comes home to me

I try to be positive. My treatment is mainly hormone therapy and boy, I cry a lot too always without reason unlike you, all caregivers are our life and loves and we need them more in our present states than ever before. My tailbone has been hit heavily with tumours in the past month. Damn cancer has returned and brought his mates with him. God bless.

[erjlg3 in reply to Scruffybut1]

I'm so sorry that it's returned scruffy

Hoping, wishing and praying that there is more to beat it down.

Most sincere,

🌼Jackie

[Cooper63 in reply to teamkv]

My heart is touched by your post. I try to be so positive for my husband and live in the present moment, but when someone asks me how I am doing, I start crying. It is hard being the primary caregiver but I feel blessed that I get to spend this precious time with my husband and make so many new memories. We have learned how to be so much more open with each other and this has allowed us to become so close and so much more in love. You are an amazing mother and caregiver and they are so lucky that you are on their team.

[Scruffybut1 in reply to teamkv]

Just catching up. I cry a lot too. The emotional side of my my has changed so much. I was a hard nosed businessman. Now my quarterly Zoladex has washed me out But...I have learned that these new emotions are there to be valued as part of my new life. I don't feel pain or depression. I can be talking happily to my dog and that's it. Tears fall on him.

[Beermaker]

That is an important post, and informative. I have been on this road since 2011, and my wife is really my only caregiver. My sister is a PhD nurse practitioner who does hospice care - she hasn't call me in a couple of years. It is so hard on my wife it tears me up. It seems harder on her than it is on me. I see her crying softly to herself after something brings the subject to mind. All of that makes me want to not bother her with what is going on with me. Certainly not the best of all possible situations.

She does give me great care. But she can do only so much. Caretakers deserve much more credit for what they do for us. I also think they could use better support. My wife will not go to a support group. She will not talk to her Dr. about what to do for all the worries and anxiety. She will not admit she needs a little help. I suppose having been a clinical therapist for most of her life has something to do with that reticence. I wish I could figure out what to do for her. I love her so much, and wish I could make her happier somehow.

[Cancer09]

for better or worse till death do we part ...till death do we part just wasn't long enough. I loved every minute as a wife caregiver and nurse taking care of my wonderful husband of 45 years ..he depended on me I depended on him ..support groups help after !! and "Understanding your Grief " book explains it all after ...Everyday was a gift .!! You would all take care of your wives the same loving way

[j-o-h-n]

To all the female caregivers in the world A GREAT BIG KISS FROM ME. To all the male caregivers in the world A GREAT BIG FIST BUMP FROM ME. And to my wife I think I'll give a big treat this coming Saturday and take her to Costco.

Good Luck and Good Health.

j-o-h-n Tuesday 08/28/2018 5:55 PM EDT

[erjlg3 in reply to j-o-h-n]

Thanks John .....and thanks for the laughs lol.

🤗Jackie

[BigRich]

I am in a lot of pain from a bad fall. Have to be more patience with my wife. Twenty years fighting this disease has taken an emotional toll on her, more then on me. She really has been doing yeoman service. We are blessed to have good caregivers-I know I am.

Rich

[erjlg3]

I hope you get better real fast Rich!

🌻Jackie