A little moan...

[Chrissie_up]

Feeling weak and shaky today. Just can't snap out of it... I have a university deadline next week, I have had to do washing, cook for my family and attempt to study today. I have work tomorrow followed by an evening class and feels like it's never ending. Trying to lead a "normal life" and not be consumed by lupus but it's catching up with me ... Sorry, had to have a little moan.

[Twdibwd Volunteer]

Hello Chrissie_up.

Your schedule would be punishing for any ordinary human being, never mind one with a Lupus condition. Are you sure you HAVE to do all that? My Dad (a very wise man I've come to realise) had 2 sayings "A willing horse is always saddled" and " The squeaky wheel gets the oil." Is there no-one you can delegate some of the work to, to even the load out and take the pressure off you? A "normal life" is only one that is tailored to the individual's needs and capabilities. The emphasis on 'individual'. By whose standards are you measuring your 'normal life'?

Go with the flow, Chrissie_up. Chill, take stock and prioritise. You can only do what you can do and the world is not going to blow up if you miss something. That sounds so much like a lecture, sorry. I'm coming up 67 years old and have had S.L.E. for 20 years and I believe I live a 'normal life' for me. Life is too short to make yourself ill trying to keep up with expectations, whether yours or others', of what you should be capable of doing.

Having spouted my stuff I'll now shut up. I do hope you are feeling better. I know, it's a pain, but work round it not through it.

Good Luck.

[Chrissie_up in reply to Twdibwd]

Thank you, I'm feeling better now. My lupus was really bad as a teen. I missed a lot of school as I was in and out of hospital so am trying to make something of my life and not give in to lupus...

I live with my mum as I was so ill (still get ill) and need support with my kids. She can sometimes be quite tough on me. She survived cancer and works like a horse and she pushes me to fight because as a mother, My children need me to fight, just like she did for me.

I get called selfish and that I am wallowing in self pity...which to a certain extent is probably true, but when you have a bad day, it's hard to focus on anyone but yourself.

I guess no one really understands unless they have the same pain and health issues...hence signing up to this website.

Thanks for your words of wisdom. Good to know there are people there to offer words of support

X

[Twdibwd Volunteer in reply to Chrissie_up]

Hi Chrissie_up (fascinating handle),

Ah yes. I get the picture. You are you and how you cope with your condition is your fight, your Mum is your Mum and her past illness is your Mum's history and how she coped with it was her fight. What do you feel? What do you want out of your life, Chrissie_up? How will you achieve it within the parameters of your Lupus? Decide that for yourself and you will have a clear way forward.

Anything is possible.