Sick of worrying😔

[Isabella1999]

Hi ladies,

I'm 30+6(31 weeks tomorrow) and I feel so unprepared. I am on maternity leave but don't get maternity pay and am waiting on hearing back if I am valid for maternity allowance. My car insurance is £160 a month, I can barely afford it. I owe my mum £450 plus due to not being able to pay anything back. My mum is moving away abroad and I'm going to be potentially homeless with a brand new baby.

I'm sick of worrying about all these things. How can I become more relaxed ? Or just forget about it for a few hours?

I honestly get so upset, it's everything I cry about, I can't seem to forget these things...

How am I supposed to support a family with no money, hundreds of pounds in debt...

Thanks in advance x

[roxannacar]

Have you spoken to citizens bureau agency? They will tell you if you are entitled to any benefits.

What about baby's father? Why is he not contributing towards baby?

Maybe you need to have a good look at your costs... do you truly need a car when you can't afford it? £160 a month on insurance is a lot of money!! Even if you get maternity allowance etc it's never going to cover such costs ... so you really need to prioritise

[Isabella1999 in reply to roxannacar]

Yes I have and I can't get anything till she's born. He is around, he was the one supposed to be paying my insurance but has left it up to me. I can't cancel my car until may when it runs out unfortunately. I would cancel all of my contract if I could but I can't... just getting so overwhelmed and like I can deal with it anymore😔

[Sisi14 in reply to Isabella1999]

Hey Hunni sorry to read your going through this at a time that’s so precious! Have you been to your local council office and spoke to them regarding your situation, with the homeless part as you don’t want to give birth and have no where to go ! When does your mum go abroad? Xx

[Isabella1999 in reply to Sisi14]

Yeah have filled in a council housing form, but it could take years.. and will hardly get any help from the government either.. just sick of feeling like this.. feeling like I can't do it anymore.. xx

[Sisi14 in reply to Isabella1999]

They have a duty to help you with a baby Hunni, it might be a mother and baby place or a one bed place but you will have something! Do you have a sure start place for mums ? Xx

[Lyndsaytw79]

You will be entitled if you are not having an income at all. Why aren’t you getting maternity pay? Does your partner live at your mums too? It won’t take years, you are high priority, they can’t expect you to be discharged from a hospital with a baby onto the streets!! Where do you live? You need to contact citizens advice ASAP

[Isabella1999 in reply to Lyndsaytw79]

I can't get maternity pay because I don't earn £112 a week, my partner lives with his parents.. I know I'm just scared as I have no trust or faith in the government .. am going to go down there today, see if we can sort something out x

[Lyndsaytw79 in reply to Isabella1999]

Good, you’ll feel much better after speaking to someone. Call first so you can take anything they need to see. How old are you lovely? x

[Isabella1999 in reply to Lyndsaytw79]

I'm 18. I know just need some help x

[Lyndsaytw79 in reply to Isabella1999]

Bless you sweetie, you’ll be okay, make sure you see CAB. Let us know how you get on x

[em00191]

It might be worth looking at whether or not you can get a Sure Start Grant. I think they're about £500 - gov.uk/maternity-pay-leave/...

[Isabella1999 in reply to em00191]

Thank you but I can't get it as I'm not in income support due to not having maternity pay. Maternity allowance and income support clash, you can only have one or the other and found that I won't be able to get it 😔x

[roxannacar]

What about job seekers allowance? Surely there is something you'd be able to claim on...

Also if your partner is not going to contribute then I would seek legal aid... it's his baby too hence his responsibility too.

[Isabella1999 in reply to roxannacar]

He is helping where he can, can't really help much but he is helping .. and I have no idea.. filled in the maternity sure start form today and will be sending it off within the next couple of days x

[Lyndsaytw79 in reply to Isabella1999]

There are benefits calculators online which when you enter your your details it will tell you what you can claim. Google benefit calculator xx

[roxannacar in reply to Lyndsaytw79]

Yes I think money saving expert has one too