Frustrated: Why is it that so many people seem... - Making Space

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Frustrated

CUmbrialass profile image
4 Replies

Why is it that so many people seem to know better than you what you need, I love going out with my walking group once in a while (not every week so that other half is not left on his own too often although he doesn't mind) but well meaning people advise me it it too long to leave him without realising what he would lose if I left the group - meeting for coffee with them when walk cancelled due to weather, lunches on some walks and Christmas lunch with the group he used to belong to. (he is now an honorary member) All made for a very unhappy week. Sorry to rant on.

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CUmbrialass profile image
CUmbrialass
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Philip profile image
Philip

Hi, don't listen to the, do Golders, as what do they know about dementia? I have Dementia and I'm still living alone, I dare say it depends on how far is he from the bus stop.

This reminds me of my sister lol and goes abroad without him, for a week at a time , with friends

and he's ok with that but as he starts to get closer to the bus stop, things will have to change and he likes it by himself lol, ask him what he wants or is he happy to be alone for an hour two.

Best of British to you.

Philip

CUmbrialass profile image
CUmbrialass in reply toPhilip

Thanks, should read first

lell1 profile image
lell1

Hi maryk

You have a separate body to your other half I assume? That being so, you can indeed do things separately and apart. As long as little risk involved in leaving him on his own for a while, I would hazard a guess that you both enjoy 'time out to be me'? He gets to be independent, you get to spend time with friends. If anything like me, it is enough that you don't actually stop thinking about the one at home, a little like having a new child and constantly worrying about them whilst you're out, but knowing in reality that they will be ok? From what you say, he can join you at the lunches sometimes when up to it? But it's still important that you do get some time doing what you like doing, and anyone who makes judgement have never been where you are? Or,, if they have, maybe it's a reflection of the feelings that they have not dealt with? Keep your head, and carry on walking!!

CUmbrialass profile image
CUmbrialass

Thank you for that response, made me feel much better. Have spoken to support worker who thinks much the same as you. As you say other people on,y look from the outside - very different

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