Growing up and in physical therapy, I was supposed to wear a diaper so that it was fully used. I wouldn't get a change otherwise. Because of the huge waste associated with diaper use long term, this is an important goal . Obviously, it is uncomfortable to lay in a partly full diaper for hours, but i'm used to it by now. That means 4-5 briefs per day. I don't use insert pads but have in the past.
Most caregivers put on diapers way too lose. The only way to stop leaks - both solid and liquid is to make sure that the brief fits tightly and snugly. I hate when diapers sag when full and it's obvious walking around. So I put them on myself to make sure they are correct. I used to lay down every time, but now I can apply seni briefs standing easily.
It's hard to hide a bm. This is true for kids as well as adults. There are some things one can do to help conceal the mess' odor. One can use deodorant spray on diaper area and inside brief itself. One can also wear plastic pants and a onesie. I have a bunch of both. I also have waterproof pants so that if I sit down and create a leak it doesn't get on the chair or couch or bed.