Saw my consultant yesterday at my local hospital. I see her every 6 months and my consultant at Newcastle every 4 months. It was just a check up and a chat about how I am feeling etc.
I told my consultant about the swimming and joining a gym and undertaking gentle exercise on the treadmill and exercise bike. She was very pleased about this but then I mentioned my concerns about my O2 levels dropping when I exercised and the knock on effect this might have on my heart. It was at this point she mentioned having a 6 minute walk test to see if I needed oxygen when I exercised. This has sort of knocked me for 6. I know I will be rubbish at it and I really don't know if I can bring myself to use the oxygen at a gym if that is the case.
I know this sounds ridiculous and really rather petty when I know so many of you struggle on a daily basis and use it all the time but to me it represents a further step in my demise due to this bloody awful disease. And a step closer to possible transplant (I have yet to decide if this is a path I wish to follow).
I know I am going to fail the test and be put on oxygen - just feel like all my hard work trying to keep as well as possible has been in vain.
This is the post I typed the other night which I promptly went and lost.
Just feels better for writing it down.