Coughing etiquette.: We now have a... - British Lung Foun...

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Coughing etiquette.

Don-1931
Don-1931
β€’28 Replies

We now have a etiquette

Which we must follow through

We must not cough just in our hand

As we were taught to do

Cough into a tissue

To catch that horrid glue

What you do with it after that

I suppose is up to you

If we have no tissues

And this I can't believe

The coughing etiquette clearly says

We have to use our sleeve

Now I remember years ago

When as a little lad

Wiping my nose upon my sleeve

Was really really bad.

So all those times I was given

I telling off instead

I should have been commended

For being years ahead πŸ™‚

28 Replies
oldest β€’ newest
JANET127

OH MY...YOUR GREAT!!! WOW! JANET127

3 likes
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Don-1931
Don-1931
in reply to JANET127

Stop it, you silly girl!πŸ˜‚πŸ˜

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Whitechinchilla

Aaaaw Don

Another pearl of wisdom falls from your lipsπŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚x

1 like
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Don-1931

Dribbled down my chin more likely. πŸ™„

2 likes
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Whitechinchilla

πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚xx

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soul-123

Bless you my child X

1 like
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cofdrop-UK

Oh I remember that Don (my father flys an aeroplane (wipe) and he has a stripe down his trousers (place). Yuk!

Serioiusly though it makes sense to cough into your sleeve. What’s the point in coughing all the germs into your hand and then shaking someone else hand.

Cx

2 likes
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Don-1931
Don-1931
in reply to cofdrop-UK

I find shaking hands a dodgy business now and I never used to do. When working I must have shaken hands many thousands of times without giving it a thought. Now if a hand feels a bit damp or sticky my mind runs riot. I'm think rubbing noses is perhaps not so bad after all.

3 likes
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Jaybird19
Jaybird19
in reply to Don-1931

Went to see a hip consultant on thursday ( he was hip definately) but actually a hip surgeon and he shook my hand but i dont think he would have appreciated me rubbing noses.!

He must have shook a number of hands that morning too and i forgot my sanitiser.

1 like
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HungryHufflepuff

I saw a thing that said you should cough and sneeze on your elbow. I almost gave myself a pain in the neck ( puns intended) practising coughing and sneezing on my elbow. πŸ™ƒ

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Don-1931

Watch you don't end up giving yourself a half-nelson. πŸ˜‰

1 like
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SquirrelsHolt

Good late afternoon Mr.D and either you are a mind reader or you've moved next door to me and I've kept you up half the night with my hacking cough!πŸ€” ..... 😀 ..... 🀧 ..... πŸ˜·πŸΏπŸ’ž

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PMRPete

That only applies to Bison in Manitoba!

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Don-1931
Don-1931
in reply to PMRPete

I must admit that puzzled me a bit. πŸ€”

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pegbl

Well done again, had a good laugh at this mainly cos that's just what I tell my grandkids πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ€§πŸ€·β€β™€οΈ

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Oshgosh

Brilliant poem.

I must have decimated the rain forest with the amount of tissues I buy.

But seriously and not to cause any offence to anyone,I think the poster is aimed at β€œ people with *ordinary *coughs”,not people like me who are regularly cough up industrial amounts of sputum.

I do try my best to inspect the colour/ consistency in private..

Alcogel rocks!

PS. I would like to have written a poem,but am not up to your standard Don.

Hope Midge is keeping warm

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Don-1931
Don-1931
in reply to Oshgosh

Well yes, the poster is aimed at bog standard coughers. We've long since given up expecting special treatment for us professional coughers. But then a cough is a cough, no matter what you are launching off. πŸ˜‰

Midge is doing very well thank you, thinking that she won the battle of the diet. Her determination to not eat her special diet resulted in her losing weight anyway. So now she is back on her normal food but smaller portions which she doesn't seem to have noticed.

1 like
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majji
majji
in reply to Don-1931

I have a feeling I suggested that Cap'n - hope you spread it around a larger plate or was it a smaller one? Did you check out the Royal Canin reviews - Midge obviously did :-)

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skischool

So bog standard coughing is not good enough says Don

Have we now joined an elite group with sputum added on

But will we look so superior with our little sample pot

I would rather be a peasant who didn't produce so much snot

As for where to put it in a hanky or on your sleeves

I better ask my butler the man called Mr jeeves :) x

4 likes
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Oshgosh

That’s good.. I’m now a professional cougher. Hooray.

I,am glad Midge has adjusted to her new regime. Has she forgiven you yet ? Look after yourselves in this horrid weather

1 like
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RoadRunner44

Oh, you've taken us back in time yet again Don! If I remember rightly it was mainly the snotty nosed boys who wiped their noses on their sleeve and didn't care who saw them do it. My mother pinned a handkerchief to my cardigan each day when I was little in case I needed to wipe my nose. But I remember doing just that too, wiping my nose on my sleeve but doing it without anyone seeing me. Oh, those were the days. Such find memories.

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majji

I have just managed to put up the wrong bit of a pic on here so I hope you still recognise me Cap'n. JUST DASHING ON TO SAY HOW... ACTUALLY CAN YOU POSSIBLY PUT THE MESSAGE I SENT YOU CAP'N IN FULL ON HERE FOR ME COS I CAN'T REMEMBER HOW TO DO IT - WITH MANY THANKS IF YOU CAN XX

1 like
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Don-1931
Don-1931
in reply to majji

πŸ‘

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majji
majji
in reply to Don-1931

Lotsalols and the worst thing is the Cap'n is aware that I never can access the meanings . . . . .

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stamford1234

Ha ha ha

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dickinson1954

Wonderful wit there Don. x

1 like
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Nik5769

I cough into tissue but I cough so much people e. g. On a bus think I have something contagious some of it is asthma. I avoid being in public.

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